I was 128lbs when I married (5'6") and now after three kids I'm 142lbs but I don't look particularly fat. I run, lift weights, sleep well. Maybe an objective observer might think I'm plump for my frame. But I don't feel plump. :/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is fascinating.

Im assuming the majority of responses are from white women. Weight is a defining standard of beauty the way complexion? Hair texture? Is for people of color.

I know where our issues stem from. Where does your weight obsession originate?

I have been married 20 years and have no idea how much I weighed on my wedding day. Maybe 140? I'm 170 now.

Maintaining a weight from your youth is an accomplishment, I think. At some point, most people give up on themselves and may be beaten down by life. It's easier to eat the chips and chug the wine than it is to exercise and go to bed early. My $0.02.

or you have little value if you gain weight and men will toss you aside or never look at you. if you had other value this would be less important.

It's not that deep, or should I say "shallow"? It's not about turning heads, it's about staying vital, fit and healthy. Looking great is a bonus.

This.

I am sorry but most older white women do not look "great" when they are a size 0-2. They wrinkle a lot faster. A white woman will keep a more youthful, fit and fresh face around a size 4-10. Generally speaking ofcourse - there are always exceptions.

I'm the $.02 poster. 5'7, 135, size 6/8, late 40's. My face and body both look good. Thankyouverymuch. I'm not competing with 20 year olds or anyone else. I am aging naturally and that's the way I want it. I want to stay fit and vital.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I was 5'8" and 120-125 when I got married. 15 years and two kids later, I'm 130-135. Shrug.

Wow. I’m surprised you were able to get pregnant. Most women I know stop menstruating at that height/weight.

Oh brother. PP is and was a normal weight. People are built very differently. I am 5’7” 120lbs and I do not look too skinny. I have a small frame. My wrists are too small to wear any bangles and I have skinny ankles. But I have muscle in my legs and arms and am a bit too soft in the tummy from not having worked out for a few years. I’m healthy, so is PP. I have friends who are my height who would look ill at my weight. I also have a friend who is 5’5” and 105lbs and that is just her body. I know her well enough to know she’s healthy. I also know my 5’5” friend who weighs 150lbs well enough to know she’s healthy too. I’m sorry about your hang ups, but don’t project.

That’s a good point. I’m sorry, pp. If you have skinny ankles, then your low BMI probably wasn’t the reason you struggled with infertility.

What? I’m the PP. I never said I struggled with fertility. As a matter of fact, I conceived my two kids the second month I tried with each.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is fascinating.

Im assuming the majority of responses are from white women. Weight is a defining standard of beauty the way complexion? Hair texture? Is for people of color.

I know where our issues stem from. Where does your weight obsession originate?

I have been married 20 years and have no idea how much I weighed on my wedding day. Maybe 140? I'm 170 now.

Maintaining a weight from your youth is an accomplishment, I think. At some point, most people give up on themselves and may be beaten down by life. It's easier to eat the chips and chug the wine than it is to exercise and go to bed early. My $0.02.

or you have little value if you gain weight and men will toss you aside or never look at you. if you had other value this would be less important.

It's not that deep, or should I say "shallow"? It's not about turning heads, it's about staying vital, fit and healthy. Looking great is a bonus.

This.

I am sorry but most older white women do not look "great" when they are a size 0-2. They wrinkle a lot faster. A white woman will keep a more youthful, fit and fresh face around a size 4-10. Generally speaking ofcourse - there are always exceptions.

LOL why do you think Botox and fillers were invented?

Anonymous wrote:I don't believe all the 5'8, 120 lb women on here. Those are models standards.

Not really. Model standards is more like 5'10 + at 120 lbs.

In the 90s, when I was a teen, it was 5'10 110.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is fascinating.

Im assuming the majority of responses are from white women. Weight is a defining standard of beauty the way complexion? Hair texture? Is for people of color.

I know where our issues stem from. Where does your weight obsession originate?

I have been married 20 years and have no idea how much I weighed on my wedding day. Maybe 140? I'm 170 now.

Maintaining a weight from your youth is an accomplishment, I think. At some point, most people give up on themselves and may be beaten down by life. It's easier to eat the chips and chug the wine than it is to exercise and go to bed early. My $0.02.

or you have little value if you gain weight and men will toss you aside or never look at you. if you had other value this would be less important.

It's not that deep, or should I say "shallow"? It's not about turning heads, it's about staying vital, fit and healthy. Looking great is a bonus.

This.

I am sorry but most older white women do not look "great" when they are a size 0-2. They wrinkle a lot faster. A white woman will keep a more youthful, fit and fresh face around a size 4-10. Generally speaking ofcourse - there are always exceptions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I was 5'8" and 120-125 when I got married. 15 years and two kids later, I'm 130-135. Shrug.

Wow. I’m surprised you were able to get pregnant. Most women I know stop menstruating at that height/weight.

Oh brother. PP is and was a normal weight. People are built very differently. I am 5’7” 120lbs and I do not look too skinny. I have a small frame. My wrists are too small to wear any bangles and I have skinny ankles. But I have muscle in my legs and arms and am a bit too soft in the tummy from not having worked out for a few years. I’m healthy, so is PP. I have friends who are my height who would look ill at my weight. I also have a friend who is 5’5” and 105lbs and that is just her body. I know her well enough to know she’s healthy. I also know my 5’5” friend who weighs 150lbs well enough to know she’s healthy too. I’m sorry about your hang ups, but don’t project.

That’s a good point. I’m sorry, pp. If you have skinny ankles, then your low BMI probably wasn’t the reason you struggled with infertility.

There is a big range of healthy weights for each height but not all body types look best or are healthiest at the weight that would be best for another.

I'm 5'4, I fluctuate between 116-122. This works for me, but most people tell me I'm very skinny. I have a very low body fat %, and it's messed with my period in the past. I have a wider set bone structure (big broad rib cage, wide set hips). My legs are pretty thick and strong, but you can see all my ribs and my abs. If I tried to be 110 or under I would probably die. The lowest weight I've been at as an adult was 112 after a nasty stomach flu.
I have also been as high as 130. I was in college and on a particular birth control pill that made me feel gross and bloated.


This doesn't mean that another 5'4 woman would be gross and bloated at 130 lbs. It also doesn't mean that a 5'4 woman at 110 lbs would be at death's doorstep. Every BODY is different.

I was probably 140. I'm 130 now, but have been down to 114. This Covid 19 pushed me over the edge.

I was a little chunky when I got married.

Anonymous wrote:I simply don't believe most of these numbers. The one posted above is a BMI of 18.0, which is clinically underweight.

I'm 5'4'' 122. At my lowest weight, I was 5'3'' 105, which is an 18.6 BMI. That required me to essentially be anorexic.

I've since developed a healthier relationship with food.

What is the circumference of your wrist?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I was 5'8" and 120-125 when I got married. 15 years and two kids later, I'm 130-135. Shrug.

Wow. I’m surprised you were able to get pregnant. Most women I know stop menstruating at that height/weight.

Oh brother. PP is and was a normal weight. People are built very differently. I am 5’7” 120lbs and I do not look too skinny. I have a small frame. My wrists are too small to wear any bangles and I have skinny ankles. But I have muscle in my legs and arms and am a bit too soft in the tummy from not having worked out for a few years. I’m healthy, so is PP. I have friends who are my height who would look ill at my weight. I also have a friend who is 5’5” and 105lbs and that is just her body. I know her well enough to know she’s healthy. I also know my 5’5” friend who weighs 150lbs well enough to know she’s healthy too. I’m sorry about your hang ups, but don’t project.

I simply don't believe most of these numbers. The one posted above is a BMI of 18.0, which is clinically underweight.

I'm 5'4'' 122. At my lowest weight, I was 5'3'' 105, which is an 18.6 BMI. That required me to essentially be anorexic.

I've since developed a healthier relationship with food.

5’7” 115lbs when married, 120lbs now two kids and ten years later.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is fascinating.

Im assuming the majority of responses are from white women. Weight is a defining standard of beauty the way complexion? Hair texture? Is for people of color.

I know where our issues stem from. Where does your weight obsession originate?

I have been married 20 years and have no idea how much I weighed on my wedding day. Maybe 140? I'm 170 now.

Maintaining a weight from your youth is an accomplishment, I think. At some point, most people give up on themselves and may be beaten down by life. It's easier to eat the chips and chug the wine than it is to exercise and go to bed early. My $0.02.

or you have little value if you gain weight and men will toss you aside or never look at you. if you had other value this would be less important.

It's not that deep, or should I say "shallow"? It's not about turning heads, it's about staying vital, fit and healthy. Looking great is a bonus.

This.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where are all of you people? I have not seen more than a handful of not overweight/too muscular women in my 2 years in the US (outside of NYC.)

I'm in Alexandria. Most of my colleagues (well, last time I saw them was pre-COVID) are females who are of a healthy BMI.

There is healthy BMI and then there is underweight. The numbers posted here are ridiculously underweight. You'd have to have freakishly small bones, a narrow figure, and/or very little muscle tone

-someone who has an actually healthy weight, with muscle.