"100% of your peers had relationships? Really? I had boyfriends in 8th grade where we went places, went to parties but I found it claustrophobic and only had very casual non exclusive relationships until my husband.


You can’t speak for an entire group of people."

The vast majority of people who have hit puberty by age 14 are sexually and romantically drawn to members of the opposite (and sometimes same) sex. And most of those will have a chance to act on and will take it. That doesn't mean they are all having PIV, but some are.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never. I will teach about safe sex. But, I will not provide contraceptives. I do not condone sex out of wedlock.

*Puke*

Why puke? I feel the exact same way. Sex should be saved for marriage.

Yeah, but horny teenagers don't feel that way which is why we need to prepare them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You do realize that condoms basically ensure they will get pregnant, right?

This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever read on DCUM. The only form of male birth control is condoms. I have sons, they have access to condoms. I talk about it often, and will continue to talk about it. I will continue to provide them. Should they be able to buy them on their own? Yes. Do teenage males always think ahead or stop in the heat of the moment? No.

Not to mention that condoms reduce the chance of STDs. Female birth control does not do that.

I keep condoms in the glove department, in their backpacks, wallet, and bathroom cabinet. If they get someone pregnant, we will cross that bridge, but at least we cross it knowing they knew better & were educated on safe sex, and I provided them with direct access.

+1. (Coming from a millennial married mom of two who uses condoms for birth control and they have never failed)

+1M
-- another millennial mom who successfully used condoms for 18 years without a pregnancy scare, and became pregnant the first time I didn't use condoms. They work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - a sincere and heartfelt thank you to whoever wrote "The problem is that OP is trying as hard as she can to get her son to understand that he shouldn’t be having sex this young, but it looks like he’s just going to do it anyway." That is exactly the case.

I have no desire to break them up. She is an admirable girl, and they have a healthy relationship. (Most importantly - neither is the boss.) It is in face very likely that they won't have sex anytime soon because she is levelheaded. But my son is most certainly a romantic who sincerely believes himself ready for many adult things. (He'd like to vote and drive as well!) Of course I know that this very delusion proves that he's immature. This situation shouldn't be happening, But it is. So what would you do?

14 is young even for dating, much less a serious relationship.

You didn’t date as a HS freshman?

Nope

Interesting. My Gen X peers and I had Gf/Bf relationships then.

100% of your peers had relationships? Really? I had boyfriends in 8th grade where we went places, went to parties but I found it claustrophobic and only had very casual non exclusive relationships until my husband.


You can’t speak for an entire group of people.

Anonymous wrote:Is there some reason your kid can’t walk into CVS and buy his own?

Because they most likely won't and proactively providing mitigates a huge risk.Duh.

Anonymous wrote:I would really worry about my 14 year old having sex. I don’t know any 14 year olds emotionally mature enough to make that decision and deal with the emotions that come with the act. Have you talked to gf parents? It might help to be on the same page on this, so you are both thwarting opportunity. Obviously, it could still happen and you want them prepared, but at this point delaying would be my primary goal.

They are going to find a way if they want. My daughter and her boyfriend were very attached in 8th and 9th grade. His mother was annoying. She would call me and ask if my dd would get an abortion if she got pregnant. It was never pleasant dealing with other mothers. Just do what you need to do.

At this age girls should have already had HPV vac and a gyn exam and discuss birth control with doctor.

Anonymous wrote:Is there some reason your kid can’t walk into CVS and buy his own?

Is the Supreme Court still allowing minors to buy them?

Anonymous wrote:WTF? Never. If he can’t buy his own condoms he’s not ready to have sex.

This is not a thought a 15 year old would have. Ever.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never. I will teach about safe sex. But, I will not provide contraceptives. I do not condone sex out of wedlock.

*Puke*

Why puke? I feel the exact same way. Sex should be saved for marriage.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, answering the question: Is there some reason your kid can’t walk into CVS and buy his own?

Yes. He's 14. GF is 15.

he can still buy them, but omg, waay too young.

My DS had them at 17, I think. He bought them himself. I found an unopen packet in the basement. We've had several long talks about unprotected sex and birth control.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, answering the question: Is there some reason your kid can’t walk into CVS and buy his own?

Yes. He's 14. GF is 15.

Girl's mom must love you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Them I’d make him practice putting it on a medium sized zucchini. Needs to go 5 for 5. Lights off.

With music blasting!

And someone screaming thats the wrong hole.

Lol

I put a bunch under their sink (shared bathroom) at 16y (B/G twins.) Found out DS was having $ex (found condom wrapper) at 17y and made sure to stock up appropriately.

We started by condoms when he was 13. He Was not dating yet we wanted to set the expectation. My daughter was also aware that we had condoms in the bathroom.

we were very open about what our expectations were about safe sex.

"You don't buy condoms for your son. Or daughter.

You have condoms in the house. In the linen closet. Someplace common and accessible. Like soap, shampoo, extra toothbrushes. You stock enough that it doesn't look like you'd count inventory (you make sure the expiration date is ok ... btw)"

This made me laugh, but for a funny reason. I'm divorced and I kept a big Costco box of condoms in a "shared" spot in the house and made it clear that I'd have no idea whether he took one. I also encouraged him to share them with his friends so that he'd have a plausible reason for taking a lot of them besides personal use. I only recently have told him about someone I'm seeing and that I'd like them to meet. This sparked a conversation about me dating in which I learned that all this time he thought I and his dad (my ex) had never had sex again since we'd divorced. LMAO!