Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question to those who feel the phrase "Full-time mom" is a dig at WOHMs --- what word do you wish the "full-time moms" would use for themselves?

"I don't work."

This is weird.

People define themselves by what they do, not what they don’t do. When people ask you about your job, do you say “I’m not a doctor” or do you say “I’m an engineer.” It’s really strange to want SAHMS/full time moms to be the only ones to list what they don’t do for a living.

Agreed. What new circle of mom shaming hell is this when now SAHMs are the only who can claim full time mom? Even if you work outside the home you are still a full time mom. Once you have a child, you're a mom period; Not just part of the time, all of the time.

Can you still say you are a "full time mom" if you put her your kid in daycare part time to "get a break" or go to the gym, or if your child goes to preschool half or full day? Or what about when they go to elementary, middle or High school and you are alone for 8 hours a day. What about those "full time moms" that hire nannies or maids? Technically don't you become "just a housewife" because you are "outsourcing your childcare" or hiring someone else to help you in your home responsibilities? Either you own make money through employment outside the home or you don't. It's really that simple.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell me please —
Is this supposed to imply that moms who work are “part time” moms? Or is it just to tell the world that one is on full time duty? Maybe I’m being dense; just want to know if this is a dig....

np Maybe stop asking the question, "what do you do?" That in itself can also be seen as "judgement" As if your work equals your self worth.

You are way too sensitive!

DP. You can't simultaneously tell people to stop asking the question "what do you do?" and say that someone else is way too sensitive.

Anonymous wrote:SAHM/SAHP doesn't mean you literally stay at home all day. I don't see the issue with this term. To me it means you are not working a job that is paid, receiving a W-2, etc.

It doesn't mean you are sitting at home eating bonbons and watching PBS kids all day.

I've been on both sides of staying at home & working. But I do have an issue with "full time parent". Shrugs.

Yeah, I never had a problem saying I was a stay at home mom. I don't get why it's not okay? Nobody literally thinks you are at home all day.

I don't think full-time parent is necessarily meant as a dig, but I have found that people who use it can be annoying in other respects, so it's a bit of a tell for me. I do run into it occasionally.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question to those who feel the phrase "Full-time mom" is a dig at WOHMs --- what word do you wish the "full-time moms" would use for themselves?

"I don't work."

This is weird.

People define themselves by what they do, not what they don’t do. When people ask you about your job, do you say “I’m not a doctor” or do you say “I’m an engineer.” It’s really strange to want SAHMS/full time moms to be the only ones to list what they don’t do for a living.

YOU DONT HAVE A JOB.

So? And you’re not a doctor/lawyer/teacher/(whatever field you chose not to go into.)

Do you list all the things you DO NOT do or do you just tell people what you do when they ask?

To quote you, assuming you're PP:


When people ask you about your job, do you say “I’m not a doctor” or do you say “I’m an engineer.”

I'd say "I don't work."

lol okay. I’ll say “I’m not an Olympic skier, I’m not an astronaut, I’m not a waitress, etc!...” It will be like a fun game of charades every time someone asks an innocent question. All so that a certain group of insecure working moms don’t get offended. Understood.

What are you talking about? Do you have no sense of logical reasoning?

At the end of the day and behind closed doors moms that work full time outside of the house and moms that care for the children and home all kinda hate each other and think the other has an easier job.

Anonymous wrote:Tell me please —
Is this supposed to imply that moms who work are “part time” moms? Or is it just to tell the world that one is on full time duty? Maybe I’m being dense; just want to know if this is a dig....

np Maybe stop asking the question, "what do you do?" That in itself can also be seen as "judgement" As if your work equals your self worth.

You are way too sensitive!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are women so touchy about their roles. Full time mom, working mom! why does it matter to you. You do you!

The sensible response. Whatever we moms call ourselves, we've all found time to be on DCUM putting in our 2 cents, loll. This is what unifies us.

Haha! So true

This argument always always comes down to women who are employed want women who do not work outside of the home to say "I don't work".
That's the only response to "what do you do" that satisfies the women in the "workforce" as that term is defined by the Dept of Labor and elsewhere.

Anonymous wrote:To answer the above question, we moved away from saying "housewife" because feminists correctly pointed out that this was inaccurate and belittled the the valuable work that women have always done and many continue to do outside the corporate, paid workforce.

+100

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I truly think and hope it is not the case that "Any implication that SAHM/full time moms provide value to their families is personally offensive" to WOHMs.

But some of the posts here really do seem to come down to the message to SAHMs that they have no value.

I don't think anyone's saying they have no value. I think people are saying the term 'full time mom' is silly.

Anyone who is a mom is a mom full-time. Doesn't matter if she's with her kids physically or not.

But they also reject any alternative answers, saying that everyone does all those things already.

Or was "housewife" a sincere and not sarcastic suggestion?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question to those who feel the phrase "Full-time mom" is a dig at WOHMs --- what word do you wish the "full-time moms" would use for themselves?

"I don't work."

This is weird.

People define themselves by what they do, not what they don’t do. When people ask you about your job, do you say “I’m not a doctor” or do you say “I’m an engineer.” It’s really strange to want SAHMS/full time moms to be the only ones to list what they don’t do for a living.

YOU DONT HAVE A JOB.

So? And you’re not a doctor/lawyer/teacher/(whatever field you chose not to go into.)

Do you list all the things you DO NOT do or do you just tell people what you do when they ask?

To quote you, assuming you're PP:


When people ask you about your job, do you say “I’m not a doctor” or do you say “I’m an engineer.”

I'd say "I don't work."

lol okay. I’ll say “I’m not an Olympic skier, I’m not an astronaut, I’m not a waitress, etc!...” It will be like a fun game of charades every time someone asks an innocent question. All so that a certain group of insecure working moms don’t get offended. Understood.

Anonymous wrote:I truly think and hope it is not the case that "Any implication that SAHM/full time moms provide value to their families is personally offensive" to WOHMs.

But some of the posts here really do seem to come down to the message to SAHMs that they have no value.

I don't think anyone's saying they have no value. I think people are saying the term 'full time mom' is silly.

Anyone who is a mom is a mom full-time. Doesn't matter if she's with her kids physically or not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, please point out instances where this phrase has been used. Because it’s not.

I'm a SAHM who has never used the term, but older gentlemen have used it towards me ("oh, you are a full time mom") in conversation. I've always thought of it as an outdated phrase.

Same here! I haven't heard anyone use it in years, other than older people my mom's age (70s).

I truly think and hope it is not the case that "Any implication that SAHM/full time moms provide value to their families is personally offensive" to WOHMs.

But some of the posts here really do seem to come down to the message to SAHMs that they have no value.

SAHM/SAHP doesn't mean you literally stay at home all day. I don't see the issue with this term. To me it means you are not working a job that is paid, receiving a W-2, etc.

It doesn't mean you are sitting at home eating bonbons and watching PBS kids all day.

I've been on both sides of staying at home & working. But I do have an issue with "full time parent". Shrugs.