Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:43     Subject: Re:Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
If the man can’t even bring home a paycheck why would any sane woman take on all the family responsibilities?


Is the issue in this area the man can’t bring home a paycheck, or is the issue that the paycheck isn’t statistically way abnormal?


The issue is, that in this area - the person who can't bring in a substantial paycheck USUALLY quits the workforce to take care of the home of the kids.

Except in the 21st century its now possible that it could be the husband or the wife without a good income.

Most women who are planning to marry aren't interested in being the breadwinner with a husband who can provide nothing but childcare (and still none of the childbearing responsibility).

There's also the fact that if the woman is earning this much, I would look at the man and say - why aren't you a success? Are you lazy?


mental disorders around here are for real. especially if their mothers did not get them help or treatment, instead enabled them throughout their teens, 20s and 30s. and this is middle and upper class families. not the mental disorders of the poor or drug abusers.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:40     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why do you think there is such a shortage of men who are "economically attractive" to women?


Opioids


Incarceration.

Ooops, we're cutting down on that since it's racist to jail someone, even repeat repeat repeat offenders.

- I say this as someone who just finished 13 sessions of Grand Jury duty for Montgomery County. Folks, it's a $hit $how out there. Stay in your bubble.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:34     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:My guess is there has always been a shortage, but now women don’t need to rely on a man to survive. Easier to work than be married to a loser.


also easier to have a child by choice + manage an au pair or nanny or after care than be married to someone who just works at the office, makes messes in the house, and can't/won't be a partner on the homefront / child-rearing front. money schmoney -- if you don't know wtf is going on with your home or kids you are not a father nor life partner.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:18     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:So women want a penis and am ATM. Not much of a surpirse


Pretty sure they don’t want a penis. Most women would take a helpful man over a great penis any day.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:17     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
The next sexual revolution will be in our households. Women need to demand equal partners. I’m a millennial and I do feel like my generation was better at picking equal partners. I passed on so many scrubs. I married an equal partner who does chores, cooks and cares for our kids equally.

No scrubs
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:03     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
So women want a penis and am ATM. Not much of a surpirse
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 20:00     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Weird responses here. I am a man. I work full time and take care of the kids for almost all activities. I also do more of the cooking and cleaning than the wife. Also do lots of DIY, pretty much rebuilt the whole house. Have masters degree and am well traveled. Honestly I think plenty of women making big money would value quite a lot of this. If they are that hung up on money though, I probably wouldn’t be that interested in them anyways due to the social pressure they put on themselves.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 19:57     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:All I can say is wow.

When the tables turn it’s all about the money. Well, you gotta give the women credit - they are very clear in the terms of the transaction.

My only regret as a high earning DH is I should have been as clear with my expectations and demands.


I don’t think that’s what we (most of us) are saying. I posted that if you’re not the breadwinner you’d darn well better be an equal partner at home (and if the pay differential is that large, be willing to be the point person with house and kids- stepping back from your work if needed). Nothing more than men expect of women, frankly (if the scenario were reversed). Women just don’t want to be the breadwinner AND do everything at home. Rightly so.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 19:39     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

Because some women think they are deserving of a Kardashian existence -- too much reality television.


Unmarried woman here. I make much more than 100K a year, own my home, and have a degree. I'm not at all uncommon in this area.

Why should I marry a guy who makes less than me? Doesn't own a home? And can't provide me a higher standard of living than I can for myself?

Especially considering the childbearing years and work would effectively halve my own income.

I'm genuinely curious.


You're still single, so I would guess you're not pretty enough to attract men who earn more than you. So that's a reason you might marry down.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 19:10     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
All I can say is wow.

When the tables turn it’s all about the money. Well, you gotta give the women credit - they are very clear in the terms of the transaction.

My only regret as a high earning DH is I should have been as clear with my expectations and demands.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 18:54     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:https://www.cnn.com/videos/business/2019/09/09/marriage-rate-study-economically-unattractive-mxp-vpx.hln


This story discusses a Cornell study that says the reason that US marriage rates are at an all time low is because there is a shortage of economically attractive men. They are labeling economically unattractive as lacking a bachelors degree or making less than $40,000 a year. Apparently women are reluctant to "marry down" so are remaining single instead. Assuming this study is valid, why do you think there is such a shortage of men who are "economically attractive" to women?


When will politicians discuss serious affirmative action programs to help poor men get married?
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 18:49     Subject: Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:A lot of women overlook men working in the trades.
The men I know working in the trades are making
big money and seem to be much happier than
office workers.


They are not "socially acceptable"


Eh, I know a few professional office working women with construction/contractor husbands. It’s less common, but I don’t think it’s socially unacceptable. They own their own businesses and have pretty flexible schedules.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 18:16     Subject: Re:Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
Marriage:

(Your earning power + my earning power)
- mortgage
- domestic labor
- parenting
- college
- job loss
- financial crisis
- elder care
- marriage crisis
- your health crisis
- my health crisis
- mental/physical decline
- slow, burdensome death

= what you have to show for it

Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 17:53     Subject: Re:Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
This situation also highlights some of the ADVANTAGES that "power couples" have. Two focused parents, two high-end earners, and two strong social networks provides exponential value to the family. Been around a lot of women who earn north of 500K even after stepping back from their careers for a few years when their kids were young. Their husbands all make more. Its the optimal way to proceed and I can see why younger women are pursuing that path - I did and there are too many examples around to miss the value.
Anonymous
Post 09/10/2019 17:43     Subject: Re:Shortage of "economically attractive" men reason for marriage decline according to new study
I remember reading an article years ago that noted how Russian women had had it with loser Russian men ... it has now happened here!