Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:No updates from OP. Guess she found what she was looking for.
Still looking. Will get there. It’s a work in progress.
Anonymous wrote:No updates from OP. Guess she found what she was looking for.
How did this happen? I thought once women’s interest is gone it is gone (for you at least.)
I have no idea how female sexuality works. I am sure part of it was the kids getting in school full time and she got off the pill. Still, its not a great frequency.
As to wives of SAHDs, my perception is women lose respect or perhaps its jealousy. I think the biggest problem comes when these women network with successful, attractive and powerful men which is the trifecta of stoking desire. And a complete contrast from what they have at home. Its not fair or right of course, and men should be able to stay home just as women should.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Married man here and this thread is a hoot. I’ve had plenty of options to be unfaithful (successful businessman, a lot of travel, decent looking) but the option I have at home is still as good as I need. After 28 years she can still surprise me as she did a couple of weeks ago when she pulled out a set of handcuffs and said this might be fun. Like every other guy I fantasize about being with other women but I don’t need to be with another woman.
Married business man here, same situation except my wife is very low drive, never initiates, often rejects, and wouldn't dream of suggesting something fun. I haven't been so faithful but I can see being in your situation with a fun, sexually adventurous wife and looking at affairs as not worth the cost.
Point being, those who say cheating isn't about sex, you and I disprove the point.
The only ones who ever say that cheating isn’t about sex ... are women. Men all seem to know that cheating IS about sex. I don’t cheat. But that’s because my wife and I have regular sex. If she was rejecting me, I would not even consider it “cheating” but just a normal way of dealing without sex at home.
Man here, this is spot on. Not proud of it but I had a couple of affairs at a point in my marriage where my wife shut down sexually. My APs were really wonderful women and they enjoyed the sex for sure but it wasn't about sex for them. One was married to an introvert who totally ignored her, the other to a stay at home dad she didn't respect. They are both divorced now.
For me it was almost exclusively about sex. Now that I am older, my libido has calmed and my wife has some interest again, affairs aren't nearly as tempting
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Married man here and this thread is a hoot. I’ve had plenty of options to be unfaithful (successful businessman, a lot of travel, decent looking) but the option I have at home is still as good as I need. After 28 years she can still surprise me as she did a couple of weeks ago when she pulled out a set of handcuffs and said this might be fun. Like every other guy I fantasize about being with other women but I don’t need to be with another woman.
Married business man here, same situation except my wife is very low drive, never initiates, often rejects, and wouldn't dream of suggesting something fun. I haven't been so faithful but I can see being in your situation with a fun, sexually adventurous wife and looking at affairs as not worth the cost.
Point being, those who say cheating isn't about sex, you and I disprove the point.
The only ones who ever say that cheating isn’t about sex ... are women. Men all seem to know that cheating IS about sex. I don’t cheat. But that’s because my wife and I have regular sex. If she was rejecting me, I would not even consider it “cheating” but just a normal way of dealing without sex at home.
Man here, this is spot on. Not proud of it but I had a couple of affairs at a point in my marriage where my wife shut down sexually. My APs were really wonderful women and they enjoyed the sex for sure but it wasn't about sex for them. One was married to an introvert who totally ignored her, the other to a stay at home dad she didn't respect. They are both divorced now.
For me it was almost exclusively about sex. Now that I am older, my libido has calmed and my wife has some interest again, affairs aren't nearly as tempting
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Married man here and this thread is a hoot. I’ve had plenty of options to be unfaithful (successful businessman, a lot of travel, decent looking) but the option I have at home is still as good as I need. After 28 years she can still surprise me as she did a couple of weeks ago when she pulled out a set of handcuffs and said this might be fun. Like every other guy I fantasize about being with other women but I don’t need to be with another woman.
Married business man here, same situation except my wife is very low drive, never initiates, often rejects, and wouldn't dream of suggesting something fun. I haven't been so faithful but I can see being in your situation with a fun, sexually adventurous wife and looking at affairs as not worth the cost.
Point being, those who say cheating isn't about sex, you and I disprove the point.
The only ones who ever say that cheating isn’t about sex ... are women. Men all seem to know that cheating IS about sex. I don’t cheat. But that’s because my wife and I have regular sex. If she was rejecting me, I would not even consider it “cheating” but just a normal way of dealing without sex at home.
Anonymous wrote:Married man here and this thread is a hoot. I’ve had plenty of options to be unfaithful (successful businessman, a lot of travel, decent looking) but the option I have at home is still as good as I need. After 28 years she can still surprise me as she did a couple of weeks ago when she pulled out a set of handcuffs and said this might be fun. Like every other guy I fantasize about being with other women but I don’t need to be with another woman.
Married business man here, same situation except my wife is very low drive, never initiates, often rejects, and wouldn't dream of suggesting something fun. I haven't been so faithful but I can see being in your situation with a fun, sexually adventurous wife and looking at affairs as not worth the cost.
Point being, those who say cheating isn't about sex, you and I disprove the point.
Married man here and this thread is a hoot. I’ve had plenty of options to be unfaithful (successful businessman, a lot of travel, decent looking) but the option I have at home is still as good as I need. After 28 years she can still surprise me as she did a couple of weeks ago when she pulled out a set of handcuffs and said this might be fun. Like every other guy I fantasize about being with other women but I don’t need to be with another woman.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have had luck on Ashley Madison.
Still the best site for affairs. Even better after the big bust. Just have to know how to work it.
How do you work it? Tried it and it has been largely a bomb - advice welcome.
It's about 10 men for every woman on there, if you exclude hookers and bots. Which is fairly representative of real life, for every woman looking to cheat, 10 men are available which is depressing to think that most married men are DTF if the opportunity presents itself. If you are a woman, be prepared to be inundated
Accurate^^. But it’s not depressing for the reason you stated. Most of these men wouldn’t be on AM at all if not for their disinterested wives. The men would happily remain faithful if not for infrequent sex at home. So for men, AM is a marriage survival tactic. The depressing part of this is how few wives actually want to f$k their husbands. That is why every married man in DC is available to any woman who approaches.
Married man here, and while I partially agree that in general, men are about as faithful as their options, it isn't true any woman can seduce any man. Some men are rock star faithful although they are in the minority. Most are like me, somewhat sex starved and dreaming of an AP, but if some random woman walked up to me and propositioned I would assume I was on candid camera.
I have turned down propositions before, from unattractive women, but also because nothing is free. If you want to know my skepticism, google professor Bruce Hay at Harvard to see what happens when a married man is gullible enough to think an attractive woman is offering NSA sex.
The thing is most APs eventually call the wife. Or let her know in some way because they end up jealous. They know their life is crap, when DH leaves it's reminds her she has no one. She knows she's only a hole in the mattress. fyi there's always strings attached. Imo it's never worth my spouse or kids hating me, over a stranger - no way. No pos is worth that. Bruce Hay got what he deserved, cheaters get with other cheaters so no surprise. His wife and kids didn't deserve any of that. He brought criminals into their lives. That's what cheaters do, they are bringing in who knows what kind of element.