I am on the board of a PTA of a title 1 school in FCPS. Our PTA pays for the school assemblies, buses for field trips, movie night, a school gift, and a few other school-wide events. In order to do that, we need to fundraise. If everyone contributed 1-2 hours a year, we'd be set, but because of moochers and slackers like you, others have to do more.

I work full time and made it clear that I cannot be at the school all of the time, but there is lots I can do at home in the evenings or on the weekends. If you cannot give of your time, give more money. You may not value the activities, but your kids do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I SAH and my friends have learned I am generally a “no.” I’m good for a discrete commitment like help with Bingo night set up, helping distribute spirit wear, etc. But I’m not interesting in an ongoing commitment. I feel zero guilt because it’s a lot of bored moms creating make-work. Some of it is really over the top.

This. So much of this is unnecessary and just a way for moms to stay busy, socializing with their friends. At least IMO.

Yeah...I'm sure it's this and not because your school could benefit from new computers or the teachers need extra money for school supplies in their classroom. They should just stop doing all that silly work that is unnecessary.

Fast-forward to next year: Oh, what's that, PP? You're wondering why none of the laptops in your child's classroom seem to work? And why your kid's 4th grade class didn't get to go on the cool field trip that previous years went on? Oh well!

Well I for one don’t want my kid playing dumb “math games” at school on a computer - I’d like the teacher to teach. And students pay for their own field trips at our school anyway. If a teacher sends home a request for something the classroom needs, I provide it immediately.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.

So what part needs to be done?

At an affluent school? Very very little. Uh, 5th grade graduation? Some parent volunteers for field day and class parties (which at our school is not even handled by the PTA), maybe a bingo night or something (optional), THE END.

What if it’s a mix of affluent and not affluent?

Should PTAs stop paying for school/teacher resources that help kids? Math & reading tools. Classroom supplies. Etc.

Sure. But do a cash drive asking people to donate money to the PTA once a year. Have a goal of $10k or whatever you want. There is no need to have a fundraiser that takes up hundreds of man hours in order to make $2500.

Yes! The fundraisers like boosterthon are the worst.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I SAH and my friends have learned I am generally a “no.” I’m good for a discrete commitment like help with Bingo night set up, helping distribute spirit wear, etc. But I’m not interesting in an ongoing commitment. I feel zero guilt because it’s a lot of bored moms creating make-work. Some of it is really over the top.

This. So much of this is unnecessary and just a way for moms to stay busy, socializing with their friends. At least IMO.

Yeah...I'm sure it's this and not because your school could benefit from new computers or the teachers need extra money for school supplies in their classroom. They should just stop doing all that silly work that is unnecessary.

Fast-forward to next year: Oh, what's that, PP? You're wondering why none of the laptops in your child's classroom seem to work? And why your kid's 4th grade class didn't get to go on the cool field trip that previous years went on? Oh well!

Then ask for CASH. For the field trip, Parents can anonymously put nothing in the envelope, and other parents can anonymously pay for another child. Any additional money given can be put in a general field trip fund.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I SAH and my friends have learned I am generally a “no.” I’m good for a discrete commitment like help with Bingo night set up, helping distribute spirit wear, etc. But I’m not interesting in an ongoing commitment. I feel zero guilt because it’s a lot of bored moms creating make-work. Some of it is really over the top.

This. So much of this is unnecessary and just a way for moms to stay busy, socializing with their friends. At least IMO.

Yeah...I'm sure it's this and not because your school could benefit from new computers or the teachers need extra money for school supplies in their classroom. They should just stop doing all that silly work that is unnecessary.

Fast-forward to next year: Oh, what's that, PP? You're wondering why none of the laptops in your child's classroom seem to work? And why your kid's 4th grade class didn't get to go on the cool field trip that previous years went on? Oh well!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.

So what part needs to be done?

At an affluent school? Very very little. Uh, 5th grade graduation? Some parent volunteers for field day and class parties (which at our school is not even handled by the PTA), maybe a bingo night or something (optional), THE END.

What if it’s a mix of affluent and not affluent?

Should PTAs stop paying for school/teacher resources that help kids? Math & reading tools. Classroom supplies. Etc.

Sure. But do a cash drive asking people to donate money to the PTA once a year. Have a goal of $10k or whatever you want. There is no need to have a fundraiser that takes up hundreds of man hours in order to make $2500.

We give gift cards to our kid's homeroom teacher. If there is something we want to do, we do it outside of the PTA, because the PTA in our school is filled with insane people.

Oddly, it works really well this way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.

So what part needs to be done?

At an affluent school? Very very little. Uh, 5th grade graduation? Some parent volunteers for field day and class parties (which at our school is not even handled by the PTA), maybe a bingo night or something (optional), THE END.

What if it’s a mix of affluent and not affluent?

Should PTAs stop paying for school/teacher resources that help kids? Math & reading tools. Classroom supplies. Etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.

Actually, if the people who are saying that 1/2 of it doesn't need to be done, at all, by anyone, are the same people who actually volunteer, then it will never be an issue.

Actually, people who give their expert comments on what needs to be done or not, are the people who never volunteer.

Actually, as a PTA volunteer, I have seen first hand that "time wastes" are nixed very quickly at the planning stage because no one has the time for it - especially those who volunteer.

Anonymous wrote:OP-calling an event that needs multiple volunteers a pyramid scheme is the height of obnoxious. It implies that your friend is benefiting financially from the volunteer hours she puts in (which are likely many many more hours than the hours your put it.). I WOHM too and only volunteer occasionally but I wouldn’t insult the amazing PTA volunteers who do so much for my kid’s school. Say no like an adult if you’re not interested in volunteering but you don’t need to be offensive about the ways you describe volunteer activities.

+1

Well said.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.

So what part needs to be done?

At an affluent school? Very very little. Uh, 5th grade graduation? Some parent volunteers for field day and class parties (which at our school is not even handled by the PTA), maybe a bingo night or something (optional), THE END.

I'm a teacher, though I SAH when my kids were little; later, I returned to work part-time and then full-time. My youngest is about to start her senior year of high school. As a parent, what I figured out -- the hard way, I must admit -- is that I hated being a room parent or doing teacher-appreciation week (ironic, I know). Those activities just felt way over the top to me and seemed to attract drama. What I enjoyed was volunteering to support the extracurriculars my kids loved -- theater and sports. My kids appreciated my efforts and it was a lot easier to recruit volunteers among parents whose kids were really involved. Plus, I actually had fun and made a lot of friends that way. And, since I was working on other stuff, nobody asked me to help with parties; if they did, I just said, "Oh, you know I wish I could, but I'm doing sets for the play/hosting the lacrosse team dinner."

If you think of volunteering for the general benefit of your school as a pyramid scheme that’s pretty pathetic. That said, there is one type of pseudo-leader volunteer to watch out for, namely, the one who comes up with a big idea, arm twists others to do the heavy lifting, and tries to get all the credit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.

So what part needs to be done?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To recap:

The PTA chair asked me to volunteer and now I feel guilty. How dare someone do this to me!

Wahhh, the same 5 parents always sign up for everything. *signs up for the first slot*

I volunteered but I didn’t get to do it the way I wanted, wahhh.

If I don’t volunteer for this, there is NOBODY in the entire school that can do it. Nobody.


Seriously, this thread is one long definition of first world problems. I say all the time that being a parent of kids in elementary school is like being in high school all over again. Fun times.

Plenty CAN do it. No one WILL do it. Lazy MFers.

Actually, what a lot of us are saying is that at least 1/2 of it doesn’t need to be done. At all. By anyone.