Anonymous wrote:OP, you have a $280k income and are living like you have a $480k income.
Seriously, your lifestyle is exactly what I'd expect about $480k income would pay for.

We make $380k and max two 401ks and save some for college and have an investment property and we don't have half the luxuries that you do.


Your lifestyle WITH appropriate level of saving is close to a $480k one. No wonder you feel poor on your income.

Agree with this. The first luxury a high income should purchase is the luxury of maxing out your retirement and putting a good amount of money in investments. Memories of $325/month in manicures and hair dye will be cold comfort if one of you loses a job or gets injured and this lifestyle disappears.

Anonymous wrote:OP, you have a $280k income and are living like you have a $480k income.
Seriously, your lifestyle is exactly what I'd expect about $480k income would pay for.

We make $380k and max two 401ks and save some for college and have an investment property and we don't have half the luxuries that you do.


Your lifestyle WITH appropriate level of saving is close to a $480k one. No wonder you feel poor on your income.

+1

OP, you have a $280k income and are living like you have a $480k income.
Seriously, your lifestyle is exactly what I'd expect about $480k income would pay for.

We make $380k and max two 401ks and save some for college and have an investment property and we don't have half the luxuries that you do.


Your lifestyle WITH appropriate level of saving is close to a $480k one. No wonder you feel poor on your income.

Are you guys in sales? People in sales spend like this.

$700/month fir a leased car is so crazy it makes me think "troll".

We have a 250k HHI and drive a 2007 Sienna minivan and a 2012 Jeep, and we are average spenders.

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious how you ever saved money for a downpayment on your house. I would think given you're spending it all now that you always have.

They probably had more free money before they had their child. They didn't adjust their spending down when they added childcare and other costs in.

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious how you ever saved money for a downpayment on your house. I would think given you're spending it all now that you always have.

Well, in the OP's defense, they likely had more disposable income each month before having a child less than 2 years ago. ($3,000 plus per month)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The cars alone are clearly a problem. What's the story there?

+1. Geez that is a LOT to spend on cars. What kind are they?

Never mind, I read the rest of the post. I'd say things like the preschool and nanny are fine--if you have two working parents, full-time childcare is necessary.

Agree that the mortgate is good.

However, the cars! What is up with that? Why do you think you need two luxury cars? That's insane.

FWIW, we have a HHI of appox. $1.2M, and we have two Toyotas. Most of the families we know in our income have two cars, one of which is usually a minivan (Honda Odyssesy or Toyota Sienna) or a three-row SUV (Acuras MDX or Toyota Highlanders), and the other car may either be a luxury car (Audis seem to be popular) or a Prius or a Subaru station wagon. We have been sending our kids to private school for almost 10 years now (tuition is our biggest monthly expense), so I feel like I have observed a lot of families that have high incomes. About 20% are flashy (Mercedes SUV, LV bags, etc.), but the rest of us are not. I think that when you have a certain income, you are more interested in preserving it and are pretty practical (but not uncomfortably frugal) rather than interested in keeping up with the Joneses.

I'm curious how you ever saved money for a downpayment on your house. I would think given you're spending it all now that you always have.

Um, when and where do you go on vacation? How do you pay for that? (I set aside money monthly to cover annual vacation).

And what about Christmas/holidays? I also put aside money every pay period to cover Christmas expenses.

I feel like you're not totally accounting for everything yet. Unless all your misc stuff is also covering higher expenses during th month of December/July/August, and you've just spread it out to monthly?

I put aside $150 from each paycheck for Christmas, so that the month of december I have $3600 to spend on presents, travel, seeing a Christmas show or two, the tree, extra decorations, a party, dinners out, etc.

The other thing I note is that every follow up post mentions your peers. You have zero idea about their finances and the choices they make. Trying to keep up with the Jones's is killing you (and your child's future).

Anonymous wrote:The cars alone are clearly a problem. What's the story there?

+1. Geez that is a LOT to spend on cars. What kind are they?

Fair point about the lease. I guess my position is that most people NEED cars. $1200 in payments for 2 cars seemed okay to me. I had $550/monthly car payment on a ~$30K car, so $1200 seemed reasonable to me for 2 cars. It's true that you can get by with a much cheaper car, but 2 ~$30K cars aren't outrageous. Now, spending more than a car payment on "home supplies" (which includes makeup) per month - that's excessive. My husband and I go through paper towels and cleaning supplies like crazy, and even then, we spend about $50/month on such things. OP is likely lumping in Chanel makeup with "home supplies" which is why she's spending a ton of money.

Personally, I think that's nuts. But, say you're financing a $35,000 car 100% (which, when you're making $280,000, is irresponsible in and of itself, but never mind). After 5 years, you know what you have? A car. A car that, properly maintained, will last at least 3 more years, and likely longer, and is paid off. After 3 years, OP has nothing.

Car leases are useful in several situations - to keep monthly payments as low as possible; to allow a business to provide cars to employees to without taking on the burdens of car ownership; or for wealthy people who don't want to keep cars for more than 3 or so years before getting a new model. OP is in none of those situations. She couldn't afford to purchase the Mercedes SUV, but wanted it because her friends had similar cars. The Audi apparently didn't have sufficient prestige. So she leased the car. This is not surprising, because it's entirely consistent, as you point out, with her other financial decisions.

I make a $700/month car payment too. But I make it into a separate bank account. From that account comes car repair expenses and, when the time comes, the funds to purchase a new car.

I buy Chanel makeup and it doesn't cost THAT much. You don't need to buy new makeup every month. It lasts longer than that.

I found a really great hairdresser that's less expensive. Ask around to your friends to see where they go. I also no longer do the expensive manicures anymore. I'd rather save that money.

At your child's age, they do not need to be doing activities. My child is 4 and does one activity at a time. That activity usually spans a few months, so $120 for tee ball covers 3 months or so of activity. Just do things with your child yourself instead of sticking them in classes.

I also agree with no need for a nanny AND school - that's crazy. If I were you I'd get rid of the nanny and put your child in a full time center/preschool program. That will save you more than $1,000/month right there, plus your child will develop great social skills and be ready for kindergarten.

Anonymous wrote:Cut back all non-essential expenses to get a better sense of what you are working with. Then slowly introduce stuff back in. You need a savings goal every month. After 15% into our 401Ks and we take home around 12K a month. We are able to save 3k for general savings and almost 1K for travel and emergency expenses. And we have student loans and a car loan in monthly savings.

**student loans and a car loan in monthly expenses I mean.

Cut back all non-essential expenses to get a better sense of what you are working with. Then slowly introduce stuff back in. You need a savings goal every month. After 15% into our 401Ks and we take home around 12K a month. We are able to save 3k for general savings and almost 1K for travel and emergency expenses. And we have student loans and a car loan in monthly savings.