Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, so I brought it up with some of the great suggestions here. Wife's first reaction was surprise that I actually had a preference (in a good way I think - she made a comment along the lines of the fact that she can be sweaty, bloated and bald and I would still be trying to have sex with her, which is true).

She said (and I don't know if this is true) that her hairdresser had recommended shorter hair because her tips were afraid (or something like that), but she prefers it a little longer and thought it was nice I had a preference on something. Someone upthread asked about current length - it is long enough for a short ponytail, just below shoulders. We were reminiscing how I used to ask her to curl her hair and she thought I stopped asking for things like that because I stopped noticing her "that way."

Anyway, it was positive and she said she will grow it out more. Her hair looks very healthy and shiny, she is 40.

Thanks for feedback.

Awesome, OP! Really happy that went that way.

It's funny you mention that - about your wife feeling like you were indifferent to details of her appearance and interpreting that to mean that you no longer "notice her" that way. I think that makes a lot of sense. It's actually VERY SEXY when a man has preferences, contrary to what some of the frigid feminazis like to say.

In any case, I hope you two get a little extra spark in the bedroom now

Anonymous wrote:OP here, so I brought it up with some of the great suggestions here. Wife's first reaction was surprise that I actually had a preference (in a good way I think - she made a comment along the lines of the fact that she can be sweaty, bloated and bald and I would still be trying to have sex with her, which is true).

She said (and I don't know if this is true) that her hairdresser had recommended shorter hair because her tips were afraid (or something like that), but she prefers it a little longer and thought it was nice I had a preference on something. Someone upthread asked about current length - it is long enough for a short ponytail, just below shoulders. We were reminiscing how I used to ask her to curl her hair and she thought I stopped asking for things like that because I stopped noticing her "that way."

Anyway, it was positive and she said she will grow it out more. Her hair looks very healthy and shiny, she is 40.

Thanks for feedback.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, so I brought it up with some of the great suggestions here. Wife's first reaction was surprise that I actually had a preference (in a good way I think - she made a comment along the lines of the fact that she can be sweaty, bloated and bald and I would still be trying to have sex with her, which is true).

She said (and I don't know if this is true) that her hairdresser had recommended shorter hair because her tips were afraid (or something like that), but she prefers it a little longer and thought it was nice I had a preference on something. Someone upthread asked about current length - it is long enough for a short ponytail, just below shoulders. We were reminiscing how I used to ask her to curl her hair and she thought I stopped asking for things like that because I stopped noticing her "that way."

Anyway, it was positive and she said she will grow it out more. Her hair looks very healthy and shiny, she is 40.

Thanks for feedback.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, so I brought it up with some of the great suggestions here. Wife's first reaction was surprise that I actually had a preference (in a good way I think - she made a comment along the lines of the fact that she can be sweaty, bloated and bald and I would still be trying to have sex with her, which is true).

She said (and I don't know if this is true) that her hairdresser had recommended shorter hair because her tips were afraid (or something like that), but she prefers it a little longer and thought it was nice I had a preference on something. Someone upthread asked about current length - it is long enough for a short ponytail, just below shoulders. We were reminiscing how I used to ask her to curl her hair and she thought I stopped asking for things like that because I stopped noticing her "that way."

Anyway, it was positive and she said she will grow it out more. Her hair looks very healthy and shiny, she is 40.

Thanks for feedback.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many of you ladies grew out your hair before your wedding then cut it quite a bit shortly thereafter?

In any case, pretty much nobody cuts their hair short for their wedding. So the idea that it looks more attractive is b.s. When you want to look pretty, the hair gets long.

Hm, no. After 35-40 very few woman have shiny, healthy looking hair. Hair, like skin, ages., no matter how well you care for it. Long old hairs is not pretty. Woman with long thining hair look pathetic.

Judging people like this will age you faster than any hairstyle.

I think she must be white. After 35, they end up with bad hair and bad skin. Most of them get dried out so quickly.

I'm from Iran and my hair is thick and extremely shiny, so thick that having it in a ponytail all day causes a headache. I have to wash it daily, there is so much natural oil. This is normal for middle eastern women.

Goody for you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many of you ladies grew out your hair before your wedding then cut it quite a bit shortly thereafter?

In any case, pretty much nobody cuts their hair short for their wedding. So the idea that it looks more attractive is b.s. When you want to look pretty, the hair gets long.

Hm, no. After 35-40 very few woman have shiny, healthy looking hair. Hair, like skin, ages., no matter how well you care for it. Long old hairs is not pretty. Woman with long thining hair look pathetic.

Judging people like this will age you faster than any hairstyle.

I think she must be white. After 35, they end up with bad hair and bad skin. Most of them get dried out so quickly.

I'm from Iran and my hair is thick and extremely shiny, so thick that having it in a ponytail all day causes a headache. I have to wash it daily, there is so much natural oil. This is normal for middle eastern women.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many of you ladies grew out your hair before your wedding then cut it quite a bit shortly thereafter?

In any case, pretty much nobody cuts their hair short for their wedding. So the idea that it looks more attractive is b.s. When you want to look pretty, the hair gets long.

Hm, no. After 35-40 very few woman have shiny, healthy looking hair. Hair, like skin, ages., no matter how well you care for it. Long old hairs is not pretty. Woman with long thining hair look pathetic.

Judging people like this will age you faster than any hairstyle.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its no wonder so many of you are miserable in your marriages. Both of us have preferences about levels of fitness and personal grooming. Of course our decision is our own but we certainly are not dismissive of what each of finds attractive.

Good luck, many of you need it.

So your husband prefers you with a fuscia pixie cut, turquoise contact lenses, in thigh high boots and fishnets. He sees you in yoga pants and feels nauseated. No nightgowns either.

Are you accommodating him because it's what he finds attractive?

No woman should have to mitigate her own



Wow, a very intellectual arguement and poorly spelled. Way to go.

I do shave my pits. And my legs. And my undercarriage. I get my hair done regularly, and I have a drawer filled with sexy lingerie that I wear. But - I don't do it "for" my DH. I do it for me. I do it because I lovefeeling sexy and turning him on, I do it because he makes me feel sexy every day, regardless if I am in pajamas with a snotty cold, in yoga pants and a ponytail, or in candlelight wearing black lace with my hair tumbled all around. I am not there for his enjoyment. I am there to share in the enjoyment together.

The fact that so many on this board can't understand the difference just shows me why there seems to be so many unhappily sexless marriages out there. What makes a woman feel sexy is being happy in her own skin, at all times. Needing to play a part to meet her partner's exacting standards undermines that.

You sound insane and long winded. Do you jabber all this nonsense in your husband's ear as well?

If you're not actually going to add anything to the discussion other than hurl personal insults, why post at all? Do you gaslight your partner as well?

Here's how fruitful discussion goes:

Person 1: I believe X. Here is why.
Person 2: I dis/agree. I don't support x because.. Y is what I believe. Here is where I feel you X argument is flawed.
Person 1: interesting. I never considered it that way. I still think X is correct, but Y is certainly a consideration.

blah blah blah blah.