Sorry if this has already been mentioned.


On the morning of Friday, May 25, 1979, six-year-old Etan Patz left his SoHo apartment by himself for the first time. He was to walk two blocks to catch the school bus, and he wore a blue captain hat, a blue shirt, blue jeans, and blue sneakers that day. He never reached the bus stop. When he did not come home when school ended, his mother called the police.

An intense search began that evening, using nearly 100 police officers and a team of bloodhounds. The search continued for weeks. At first, detectives considered the Patzs as possible suspects, but they quickly determined the parents had no involvement. A massive search involving neighbors and police covered the city with missing child posters featuring Patz's face, but resulted in few leads. Patz's father, Stan Patz, a professional photographer, used a collection of photographs he had taken of his son in the effort to find the missing boy. His photos of Etan were printed on countless missing child posters and milk cartons, and they were projected on screens in Times Square.

The saddest part of this thread is OP isn't willing to get up a half-hour earlier in order to let her son have more time with his friends.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Who are the adults who are calling CPS? I would think that most people would mind their own business unless a child was truly in danger. This idea that neighbors run around reporting judgement that differs from their own is troubling. Who does that?

Have you heard of this case?

http://www.wjla.com/articles/2015/03/silver-spring-parents-charged-with-child-neglect-for-allowing-kids-to-walk-home-alone-112094.html

Yes. They allowed their 6 year old to walk home from a park unsupervised and they got called out for breaking the supervision laws in their state (which they did in fact break because a 10 yr old can not supervise a 6 year old). So I have limited sympathy for them. I think these were the same folks who gave their kids those stupid "my kids are free range kids" cards to carry around- ugh.

If I give my 16 year old a card that says "my child is a free spirit and can drive as fast as he wants to" does that mean that he can go 65 in a 25mph zone. Nope. You can't allow your kids to break the law. But you can work to change a law that you do not agree with.

Anonymous wrote:6 is wayyy to young to have a kid walk alone to the bus stop. Op, don't do it. If I saw the kid walking alone, yes I would call 911. Sorry, but it's better you know the reality than end up with a case.

Really? Even if he's clearly walking to a bus stop and there are other kids around? What do you say to the dispatcher? That some kid is walking to the bus stop alone and the cops should rush over and grab him before the bus comes?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:6 is wayyy to young to have a kid walk alone to the bus stop. Op, don't do it. If I saw the kid walking alone, yes I would call 911. Sorry, but it's better you know the reality than end up with a case.

Seriously?

We're talking about a 6 yr old walking "half a block" so presumably this 6 yr old you see walking alone to the bus stop would be a neighbor, a kid you know. You would seriously call the cops on his parents?

Anonymous wrote:6 is wayyy to young to have a kid walk alone to the bus stop. Op, don't do it. If I saw the kid walking alone, yes I would call 911. Sorry, but it's better you know the reality than end up with a case.

Seriously?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The question is not whether or not it was a good idea, or whether or not you would allow your own children to do it. The question is, did this used to be a normal thing for children to do? Yes, it did. Children then were capable of doing it, and did do it. So how come they are not capable of doing it now?

Because those kids grew up and opted not to put their own kids in similar situations?

Yes, although that's kind of a circular argument -- the reason most kids can't do it now is because people don't expect them to do it now. If somebody did expect them to do it now, could they? Since most kids used to be able to do it, I think that most kids could do it now, too.

Funny thing is, I'm a big proponent of lengthening the leash on kids. In many ways I think that the constant supervision and hovering that is sometimes done is incredibly stunting. A reasonably responsible 9 year old should be able to ride his bike around the block without his (loving, good, responsible) parents being reported...

Unfortunately there are parents that don't use great judgement or even seem to care - maybe they allow their 3 year old to ride his trike up and down the sidewalk and into the street alone, no supervision. Later on, they let their 14 year old stay out all night..and do God knows what. Somehow we all wind up lumped in with these folks which is sad..

6 is wayyy to young to have a kid walk alone to the bus stop. Op, don't do it. If I saw the kid walking alone, yes I would call 911. Sorry, but it's better you know the reality than end up with a case.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't you just walk him to the stop?

I have a second younger child whose preschool starts at 9. I am not even sure what time the bus comes but I know it would be about 40 min earlier than when we need to be out the door.

I would never let a child that young do that. Not for many years.

You wouldn't let a six-year-old walk half a block to the school bus stop? Would you let an eight-year-old? Would you let a ten-year-old? How old would the child need to be?

42.

Well, 42 is the new 6...

OP here. I very clearly remember walking home alone from my elementary school in kindergarten. You could see the elementary school from our house. I'm going to guess it was 1.5 blocks.

We moved to Philadelphia when I was 7 years old. I walked several city blocks to go home. I have driven this road as an adult and it was probably about half a mile.

We live in a very safe neighborhood. My son would have to walk to the end of our cul de sac to catch the bus. It is just too much trouble to rush unnecessarily and cut our morning routine by 30 minutes. Since our entire routine from wake up time to out the door is currently about 45 min, I am not going to readjust just so my son can ride the bus with some friends for 15 min.

I would reconsider. Kids love the bus, and in Kindergarten especially, it's a huge deal to ride the big yellow school bus.

Anonymous wrote:

Who are the adults who are calling CPS? I would think that most people would mind their own business unless a child was truly in danger. This idea that neighbors run around reporting judgement that differs from their own is troubling. Who does that?

Have you heard of this case?

http://www.wjla.com/articles/2015/03/silver-spring-parents-charged-with-child-neglect-for-allowing-kids-to-walk-home-alone-112094.html

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The question is not whether or not it was a good idea, or whether or not you would allow your own children to do it. The question is, did this used to be a normal thing for children to do? Yes, it did. Children then were capable of doing it, and did do it. So how come they are not capable of doing it now?

Because those kids grew up and opted not to put their own kids in similar situations?

Yes, although that's kind of a circular argument -- the reason most kids can't do it now is because people don't expect them to do it now. If somebody did expect them to do it now, could they? Since most kids used to be able to do it, I think that most kids could do it now, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm well above 40 and I'm all for giving kids some independence. But 6? That's still a little kid. Just because they *can* do something doesn't mean that they are *ready* to do something. If your kinder trips and skins his knee on the walk to the bus stop. if a strange dog scares him, if a big kid steals his lunch...his confidence in handling situations all by himself could be shaken forever. That may sound dramatic, but what seems like a minor thing to an adult can seem very scary to a 50 pound kid.

I've volunteered in kinder/first grade classes and I met a lot of super bright and funny little kids (my own kids were pretty capable at that age and they were tall/big for their age too), but none of them were ready to fend for themselves just yet. And I never met a parent who expected them to...

If you're well above 40, then when you were six, almost all six-year-olds were ready to do it. What has changed?

I disagree that most kids were getting themselves off to school and carrying around house keys when they were in Kinder. It is possible that some of you are remembering walking to school or waiting at the bus stop with older siblings and/or friends. But even back in the day 6 year olds were generally not walking the neighborhood all by themselves.

Yes, they were walking by themselves. They really were. It's not Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. It really, actually did happen.

I'm only 35, and at 6 I was allowed to be out alone anywhere on my block, and allowed to cross the street I lived on to play with the kids on the other side. I also walked to school alone, but I agree with other posters, though that's different than standing and waiting for a bus on a corner. (Which I did starting at 9.) My DS is 5, and he is allowed to play alone only in our yard (front or back) and in front of the next door neighbor's. I recognize that times have changed, and today I have to worry about other adults reporting me to CPS, which is a risk I try to minimize. Times have also changed in that there are practically no other children outside these days, even though there are many kids in the neighborhood.

Who are the adults who are calling CPS? I would think that most people would mind their own business unless a child was truly in danger. This idea that neighbors run around reporting judgement that differs from their own is troubling. Who does that?

OP, I think your plan is a good one. Once they are eight, a lot of these worries go away. They change a lot between Kinder and third grade.

I used to walk by myself 8 blocks to K in the early '80s. It was half day afternoon K so I walked home with my first grade brother.

That said, since a K'er must be at the bus stop with an adult, and its a PITA for OP, I would let riding the bus be a special once-in-awhile privilege he could earn. When he's in first grade, he can walk by himself four houses and wait with the other kids, and if you are nervous about it, you can walk until you can physically see him and keep an eye on him the first few times.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm well above 40 and I'm all for giving kids some independence. But 6? That's still a little kid. Just because they *can* do something doesn't mean that they are *ready* to do something. If your kinder trips and skins his knee on the walk to the bus stop. if a strange dog scares him, if a big kid steals his lunch...his confidence in handling situations all by himself could be shaken forever. That may sound dramatic, but what seems like a minor thing to an adult can seem very scary to a 50 pound kid.

I've volunteered in kinder/first grade classes and I met a lot of super bright and funny little kids (my own kids were pretty capable at that age and they were tall/big for their age too), but none of them were ready to fend for themselves just yet. And I never met a parent who expected them to...

If you're well above 40, then when you were six, almost all six-year-olds were ready to do it. What has changed?

I disagree that most kids were getting themselves off to school and carrying around house keys when they were in Kinder. It is possible that some of you are remembering walking to school or waiting at the bus stop with older siblings and/or friends. But even back in the day 6 year olds were generally not walking the neighborhood all by themselves.

Yes, they were walking by themselves. They really were. It's not Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. It really, actually did happen.

I'm only 35, and at 6 I was allowed to be out alone anywhere on my block, and allowed to cross the street I lived on to play with the kids on the other side. I also walked to school alone, but I agree with other posters, though that's different than standing and waiting for a bus on a corner. (Which I did starting at 9.) My DS is 5, and he is allowed to play alone only in our yard (front or back) and in front of the next door neighbor's. I recognize that times have changed, and today I have to worry about other adults reporting me to CPS, which is a risk I try to minimize. Times have also changed in that there are practically no other children outside these days, even though there are many kids in the neighborhood.