Anonymous
Post 04/28/2015 05:27     Subject: Re:I hate my best friend's kid
Anonymous wrote:1. Your kids have to deal with the fact they sometimes have to deal with a situation is not to their liking.

Or

2. You teach them the world revolves around them and dump your friend.



Really? You are serious, aren't you? You are going to force your kids to play with a bully because "Sometimes they just have to deal with a situation not to their liking"? I feel sorry for your kids. Everyone deserves a fair chance - but if someone bullies you the right way of "dealing with a situation not to your liking" is to end that very situation. I would NEVER force my kids to play nice with a child who treats them like dirt. I would in fact teach them to voice how they feel and then walk away.

If I want to stay friends with my friend I would also talk to my friend about her daughters behavior, see if that changes anything and if it doesn't I would absolutely make it clear that I love my friend but will not have my kids deal with her daughter anymore until said daughter changes and behaves like a human being.
Anonymous
Post 04/27/2015 21:40     Subject: I hate my best friend's kid
Anonymous wrote:My nephew is a brat like this. I say to him:

"If you want to say ugly things, you can do it somewhere else. Not in this house. That's not what we do here."

It has taken a while, but it is slowly beginning to work.



I do think its easier if you're family, to have this kind of impact.
Anonymous
Post 04/27/2015 21:31     Subject: I hate my best friend's kid
My nephew is a brat like this. I say to him:

"If you want to say ugly things, you can do it somewhere else. Not in this house. That's not what we do here."

It has taken a while, but it is slowly beginning to work.
Anonymous
Post 04/27/2015 19:41     Subject: Re:I hate my best friend's kid
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Separate. Do not subject your child to monster girl.

My kid is well-behaved and easygoing. As pp said, he is viewed as good buddy material for everyone else's ill-behaved child. Teachers sit the troubled kid next to him hoping his good influence rubs off. That is all well and good except at some point I feel my child isn't being allowed to express that he would rather not be the assigned buddy in class or on playdates. Even I pushed him for too long into those situations. Now if he's OK with it we go with it, but I don't force him to endure someone who is disrespectful to him (regardless of their situation) if he would rather not. He'll have a whole life of being in these situations without his own parent setting them up regularly.


My teachers did this, too. I was quiet and studious and never disruptive in class, so they sat me next to the loud kids hoping I would sort of diffuse their rowdiness. I would come home crying that my teacher hated me because she always made me sit with the bad kids.

While I agree that kids do need to learn to deal with bratty kids, one way that you deal with obnoxious people is to minimize your contact with them. I wouldn't make my kids spend time with a truly mean child just to teach them a lesson about dealing with mean people. Maybe just make it clear to your girls that they are not obligated to play with the mean girl at all, and you will back them up on this. Because the mean girl, too, needs to learn that if she's nasty, people won't want to play with her. And yeah, I wouldn't subject my kids to that every often.

This has been happening to my DS for the last couple of years and this coming school year, I will be putting a stop to it. I'm glad that my kid has the traits to be a good influence on others, but the other kids has become a negative influence on my kid. He's picked up a lot of behaviors and attitudes that we've has to undo and its created strife in our home. He needs exposure to less problematic kids.
Anonymous
Post 04/27/2015 18:08     Subject: I hate my best friend's kid
We have this situation. My answer is to meet my friend for lunch or breakfast during school hours only maybe once a month - no kids around.