Anonymous
08/11/2014 18:32
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Abortion in my lower 20s with a crappy ex boyfriend. Now I am married to an older man and we are having fertility/miscarriage issues. I fear we will never have kids and if he dies before me I will be alone for the rest of my life. I honest to God think that pregnancy was my only shot at being a mom and God is punishing me for it.
This is a common belief after an abortion. You are not being punished.
+1 After fertility issues for several years, I had two great kids with my wonderful husband. Crappy college boyfriend is divorced with no children. You are NOT being punished. Keep trying!
Anonymous
08/11/2014 17:40
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
bump
Anonymous
02/22/2014 16:00
Subject: Re:What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Moving to the U.S and getting married here. Don't get me wrong - I love this country. But I feel my life would be completely different had I stayed in my country and followed my career path. I would have a established career by now, all my friends and family around me, and probably a husband and child too. Here I am just a SAHM - nothing against, but I don't feel it is for me. It is not by choice I will tell you that. No friends, no family and because I am very pragmatic, the future scares me…
I know that in a blink of an eye my young children will be out of the house living their lives and I won't have anything to live for - no career, still no family or friends. But by then it would be too late to go back to my country because my adult children will be here, plus by then I won't have any close friendships there anymore.
I'm going back when my children are grown.I still have close friendships there.Thanks to facebook I have connected with even more people back home.I visit them once a year and some of them visit me here.
I'm very excited about moving back, and my retirement there!
Anonymous
02/22/2014 14:43
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Abortion in my lower 20s with a crappy ex boyfriend. Now I am married to an older man and we are having fertility/miscarriage issues. I fear we will never have kids and if he dies before me I will be alone for the rest of my life. I honest to God think that pregnancy was my only shot at being a mom and God is punishing me for it.
This is a common belief after an abortion. You are not being punished.
Anonymous
02/22/2014 11:06
Subject: Re:What is your biggest regret?
Moving to the U.S and getting married here. Don't get me wrong - I love this country. But I feel my life would be completely different had I stayed in my country and followed my career path. I would have a established career by now, all my friends and family around me, and probably a husband and child too. Here I am just a SAHM - nothing against, but I don't feel it is for me. It is not by choice I will tell you that. No friends, no family and because I am very pragmatic, the future scares me…
I know that in a blink of an eye my young children will be out of the house living their lives and I won't have anything to live for - no career, still no family or friends. But by then it would be too late to go back to my country because my adult children will be here, plus by then I won't have any close friendships there anymore.
I know that in a blink of an eye my young children will be out of the house living their lives and I won't have anything to live for - no career, still no family or friends. But by then it would be too late to go back to my country because my adult children will be here, plus by then I won't have any close friendships there anymore.
Anonymous
02/22/2014 10:58
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Definitely a few trolls with agendas posting now...
Don't be invalidating others' experiences please.
Anonymous
02/22/2014 07:55
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Choosing the wrong major the first time around. Loved my college and the friends and experiences I had there, but studied the wrong thing for 4 years. At 26 ended up going back to school for an accelerated degree program in something I love, I just wish I had done it the first time around. Would have saved a lot of money and not felt like I threw so much money down the toilet for studying the wrong major.
The rare useful, nonbileous thread. Kudos! PP What was the 1st and 2nd major?
Anonymous
02/22/2014 07:46
Subject: Re:What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:I regret being such a prude in my 20s. I should have slept around more (not in a sleazy way). Now I'm married and I wish I'd had more experience before committing to my wonderful DH.
Me too!!
Mostly, I regret not forgiving my father for his leaving our family and feeling so embarrassed by his addiction issues, I had no empathy. I wanted nothing to do with him. Admittedly, I was 15 when he left, but I held a teenage grudge toward him for years. He would write me letters and I never wrote back. I thought I had all the time in the world to forgive him and move on. I suppose I was waiting for him to write me one more letter. Make one more phone call. He died of a heart attack. Before his issues came to light, I was the biggest daddy's girl. I should have been in his corner or at least told him I loved him no matter what.
Anonymous
02/22/2014 07:19
Subject: Re:What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Letting my parents talk me into going to a piddly regional college for the free ride when I had the credentials to get into any college of my choice. If I could do it again, I would not go there.
And I was the one who chose the fancy college and I'm swimming in student loan debt. We might get it paid off by the time my 4YO starts college. I often wish I would have gone to the state school like my parents advised.
The grass is always greener. No matter the college, someone is not a fit there. And you don't know it until you attend. I thought an excellent, large, school is where I should be going, but a smaller, intimate, environment like Bowdoin would have been much better.
Anonymous
02/22/2014 07:15
Subject: Re:What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:I have regrets I guess, but I can see with each one that if I had made a different choice, something else awesome in my life wouldn't have happened. So it's hard to regret...you can't just pick and choose different paths, once you go down one path it shifts everything else.
Very true. Even with the mistakes I continue to beat myself up over, good things came from what happened.
Anonymous
02/22/2014 01:27
Subject: Re:What is your biggest regret?
Going to college in my home town and living at home.
My parents were not supportive of my wishes to go away to college. They told me they would pay the cost of tuition and books at our local school and nothing more. Their primary goal was to keep us under their roof as long as possible. This was before the internet, so I didn't really know how to go about researching colleges or student loans on my own. So I just took the easy way out and stayed home. I briefly moved into an apartment with a friend, but that didn't last long. I moved away a few days after graduating. I had no idea how to manage my money, cook, shop, take care of my apt. I didn't have many friends. Most people make their friends in the dorms or frat/sorority house - not in their classes. So I missed out on all of that. DH has a fantastic group of friends from his college dorm. It makes me sad that I missed out on that. College is a time to transition. It was very hard for me to suddenly adjust to being on my own. Also, my school was not great and I got a crappy education.
I actually think my parents sabotaged me on purpose. THey did not encourage me to study for my ACT and they said my ACT score didn't matter since our college was open admission. I got a 17! I didn't even try. It was years later that I figured out most people actually study for it! I honestly think they didn't want me to do well because it would help me get in to another college. I didn't even take my SAT.
I know I know. I am an ungrateful brat, and should appreciate that they paid for any education at all. Many people go to college with no money from mom and dad, and they make it work. I could have put on my big girl panties and figured out how to go after what I wanted. All that is true, but I'm still resentful.
My parents were not supportive of my wishes to go away to college. They told me they would pay the cost of tuition and books at our local school and nothing more. Their primary goal was to keep us under their roof as long as possible. This was before the internet, so I didn't really know how to go about researching colleges or student loans on my own. So I just took the easy way out and stayed home. I briefly moved into an apartment with a friend, but that didn't last long. I moved away a few days after graduating. I had no idea how to manage my money, cook, shop, take care of my apt. I didn't have many friends. Most people make their friends in the dorms or frat/sorority house - not in their classes. So I missed out on all of that. DH has a fantastic group of friends from his college dorm. It makes me sad that I missed out on that. College is a time to transition. It was very hard for me to suddenly adjust to being on my own. Also, my school was not great and I got a crappy education.
I actually think my parents sabotaged me on purpose. THey did not encourage me to study for my ACT and they said my ACT score didn't matter since our college was open admission. I got a 17! I didn't even try. It was years later that I figured out most people actually study for it! I honestly think they didn't want me to do well because it would help me get in to another college. I didn't even take my SAT.
I know I know. I am an ungrateful brat, and should appreciate that they paid for any education at all. Many people go to college with no money from mom and dad, and they make it work. I could have put on my big girl panties and figured out how to go after what I wanted. All that is true, but I'm still resentful.
Anonymous
02/21/2014 22:53
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Not reporting when I was date raped in the early 90s.
I'm so sorry.
Anonymous
02/21/2014 20:41
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Not reporting when I was date raped in the early 90s.
Anonymous
02/21/2014 20:40
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Anonymous wrote:Not finishing college.
This
Anonymous
02/21/2014 20:37
Subject: What is your biggest regret?
Dropping out of Michigan for a variety of f'ed up reasons, although the way things wound up I am probably in the exact same place as if I had graduated from there. My friends think I am nuts thinking about this years later, and personally believe they are right.