Anonymous
06/16/2026 15:49
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:DD is applying to a single digit selective college.
In her school there are two boys who are also applying, both from very wealthy families. One is legacy and heavily donates, another donates seven digit donations.
My kid has no chance.
Correct. Males have an admission advantage at almost every university irrespective of legacy or donor status. Only hope is that she fills a need the university has to round out the class (eg they need a violinist and she is a virtuoso)
Anonymous
06/16/2026 15:40
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:Middle class families who can only pay tuition, have no advantage.
Assuming typical assets, Ivy League tuition is free for middle class families.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 15:37
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:For context on how much MORE unfair admissions was in the past, here is JFK's essay detailing why he wanted to go to Harvard. It was so compelling to the admissions office that it compensated for his 1190 SAT score...
"The reasons that I have for wishing to go to Harvard are several. I feel that Harvard can give me a better background and a better liberal education than any other university. I have always wanted to go there, as I have felt that it is not just another college, but is a university with something definite to offer. Then too, I would like to go to the same college as my father. To be a “Harvard man” is an enviable distinction, and one that I sincerely hope I shall attain."
April 23, 1935
John F. Kennedy
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DD is applying to a single digit selective college.
In her school there are two boys who are also applying, both from very wealthy families. One is legacy and heavily donates, another donates seven digit donations.
My kid has no chance.
I am very sorry to break it to you, but nothing about college admissions is fair. And it never was fair. The way it is unfair changes a bit over the decades.
Seems like it worked pretty well since he went on to become President. Why should being a legacy automatically disqualify you if you are otherwise impressive? Plenty of duds are graduating these days who go on to accomplish next to nothing.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 15:26
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m not rich so no donations.Anonymous wrote:Its not rigging if OP does it.
You’re not rich, but your child goes to private school?
What’s the threshold to qualify as rich in your mind?
Middle class kids go to private schools, they also have scholarships for low income students.
Middle class families who can only pay tuition, have no advantage. Wealthy can donate while poor can bring federal aid and make college endowment look charitable waiving tuition. Applicants only able to pay their own bill are plenty and useless.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:41
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:DD is applying to a single digit selective college.
In her school there are two boys who are also applying, both from very wealthy families. One is legacy and heavily donates, another donates seven digit donations.
My kid has no chance.
Of course your kid has a chance. The students are all competing to get into universities, but the universities are also competing for certain students. It sounds like she can't compete in the donations arena or in the legacy arena.
But there are other priorities in other arenas and that is where she needs to compete. They want to fill fill teams and orchestras and singing groups and dance groups and majors for all of the departments and on and on and on. Figure out her strong suit and then match that up with the college looking for that suit.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:32
Subject: Game is rigged
For context on how much MORE unfair admissions was in the past, here is JFK's essay detailing why he wanted to go to Harvard. It was so compelling to the admissions office that it compensated for his 1190 SAT score...
"The reasons that I have for wishing to go to Harvard are several. I feel that Harvard can give me a better background and a better liberal education than any other university. I have always wanted to go there, as I have felt that it is not just another college, but is a university with something definite to offer. Then too, I would like to go to the same college as my father. To be a “Harvard man” is an enviable distinction, and one that I sincerely hope I shall attain."
April 23, 1935
John F. Kennedy
"The reasons that I have for wishing to go to Harvard are several. I feel that Harvard can give me a better background and a better liberal education than any other university. I have always wanted to go there, as I have felt that it is not just another college, but is a university with something definite to offer. Then too, I would like to go to the same college as my father. To be a “Harvard man” is an enviable distinction, and one that I sincerely hope I shall attain."
April 23, 1935
John F. Kennedy
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DD is applying to a single digit selective college.
In her school there are two boys who are also applying, both from very wealthy families. One is legacy and heavily donates, another donates seven digit donations.
My kid has no chance.
I am very sorry to break it to you, but nothing about college admissions is fair. And it never was fair. The way it is unfair changes a bit over the decades.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:29
Subject: Game is rigged
That’s life.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:27
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:I agree that OP is a whiner. And my kid is at public so this isn't an issue.
There are at least as many legacies if not more in public.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:23
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:The legacy with meh stats is unlikely to get in unless his family donates a lot or there is some super impressive outside activity you don't know about. But the kid whose family is donating $$$ could easily get in if a reasonable student. Either way I would encourage your DD to find a more realistic top choice school.
Yes to both of this — legacy isn’t really a big bump. But even if those two get in that doesn’t mean your kid won’t get in if she is really a great candidate. There’s not really a lid on applicants from a particular school. But I’d also encourage her not to get her heart set on any single digit acceptance school. There’s not that much difference between brown and another school, or fill in the blank for any of those schools.
Ummm...yes there typically is a lid on applicants from the same school. So if school typically takes only 2 kids, then don't ED there. If they take 10, then go for it. But top schools want diversity in all ranges, so they don't take everyone from the same HS
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:21
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yup, it is unfair. Now your job as a parent is to make sure your kid talks to her GC, selects schools that are in the running (ie- no big donor/legacy apps to compete with) and moves forward without bitterness.
I hate this. In your opinion we should tell our kids “step aside and make room for the rich kids and don’t be bitter”?
No, I’m telling her apply, throw your name in the hat. She has a balanced school list, she will be fine.
You are not "making way for the rich kids". You are talking about a school that likely has single digit acceptance rates. So it's challenging for everyone. However, for ED it's obvious those 2 kids will get in, meaning the OP kid likely won't. So don't waste their ED on that.
Just like if someone at the HS has better stats/EC, they will get in on ED before OP kid.
So throw name in hat for RD/EA, but find a better ED choice
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:12
Subject: Game is rigged
I agree that OP is a whiner. And my kid is at public so this isn't an issue. But I could imagine being frustrated if at private school. I bet a *lot* of kids are legacies and possibly donors at one school or another. It seems like a great (but not head-and-shoulders-above-the-rest kid might be at a real disadvantage when peers have a hook at a lot of the schools they would like to aim for.
Anonymous
06/16/2026 12:08
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:At most elite/selective schools, there are more female applicants than males, so males typically have a higher admit rate already in order to balance the class by gender. That is likely a bigger "rig" than being a donor (absent "mega-donor").
alternatively, much easier as a female athlete at the same schools.
it's complicated.
people in this country are such whiners.
Anonymous
06/15/2026 23:13
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yup, it is unfair. Now your job as a parent is to make sure your kid talks to her GC, selects schools that are in the running (ie- no big donor/legacy apps to compete with) and moves forward without bitterness.
I hate this. In your opinion we should tell our kids “step aside and make room for the rich kids and don’t be bitter”?
No, I’m telling her apply, throw your name in the hat. She has a balanced school list, she will be fine.
You do you. These schools are not that different. If these kids are applying to say Harvard and your kid decides Yale has a better open lane from your school and thus she has a better shot, that is going to make her bitter?
The admissions process for colleges has many ridiculous aspects to it. At least she’s not competing against a fencing recruit. Then she’d be toast
Anonymous
06/15/2026 20:22
Subject: Game is rigged
Anonymous wrote:Op provided no details about her own kid but she already has her excuses ready.
Adding, regardless of the competition, an unhooked kid isn’t getting into H/Y/P/S for a private unless top 10 percent of class with high stats, leadership, and a compelling story to link ecs and volunteer activities or top 20 percent with a national level talent.
Anonymous
06/15/2026 20:20
Subject: Game is rigged
Op provided no details about her own kid but she already has her excuses ready.