Anonymous wrote:There can be abuse, resentment, unhappiness and injustice in trad or non trad marriages.

As antivaxxers observe, vaccinated people can still get sick. What they usually leave out is that vaccinated people get sick *way* less often.

Your observation about abuse happening in any kind of marriage is similar. True but disingenuous.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am trad wife and my husband is the complete opposite of red pill. We are both pretty liberal.
He doesn’t demand that I am a housewife. It was a decision we made together. I wanted it and he was ok with that. The traditional “gender roles” come naturally to us and we just go with that.

It works for us without the need to follow some script or ideology.

We decided together that it made more sense for me to stay home with 3 kids and now I need to separate/divorce and am unable to earn enough to cover childcare. It sucks. All my fault, I know.

PP here. If it is his kid he should be contributing to child care. We set finances up so even if we weren’t together I wouldn’t need to work by investing my premarital income which is entirely mine he has no access to. In our manage all of his income goes into joint accounts. He never looks at them and trusts me to make decisions based on his personal expectations and our marital expectations. I take care of my financial needs with the joint account money.

I take care of the home, cooking,, always dress and present nicely, pamper myself, pay any bills that aren’t automatically withdrawn. He makes vacation plans and takes care of major financial/legal decisions. I have a separate attorney outside of family attorney that DH encourages me to use anytime the family attorney draft something, something needs signing.

Anonymous wrote:understand the logic.

Redpill men and tradwife women believe that a woman should marry in her early 20s, preferable as a virgin, and stay home and raise children.
...
This requires her to ... marry rich. ... the math just isn’t mathing.

It is about emotion, not logic. Red Pill explains how the sexual marketplace works, mixed with delusional nostalgia, fantasy/aspiration, and aggrieved entitlement.

Young men outearned young women before "women's lib" and internet dating. Marilyn Monroe worked at a munitions factory and Anna Nicole Smith was a waitress at a fried chicken restaurant! An ambitious young man who was lucky enough to grow up next to a super model could marry her and building a satisfying life. Ralph Kramden (Honeymooners bus driver) and Doug Hefferman (King of Queens delivery driver) had stunning, devoted wives.

Now college is 60% women and young women outearn young men. Women have always wanted taller, older, richer men. They can now afford to date exciting bad boys and settle down in their thirties.

The sexual marketplace is cruel to young men. Young nerds get essentially no dates. Young women hook up on dating apps, sometimes after a chump has taken them on a date. Divorce rates have risen.

Women routinely demand men of above-average height, education, and income. A man can work hard in a hostile college environment where he risks expulsion for a woman's phony accusation. A Penn student was charged with calling women "water buffaloes"! Then the man can marry a woman with a masters in victim studies and six figures in student loans. He will suffer in a cubicle job until she "divorce-rapes" him and forces him to pay money and rarely see his kids. Male suicide rates are high:

.

Alternatively a man can use steroids and womanize in his twenties. Then he can marry a devoted 22-year-old to support his alpha agenda. After harvesting the millet and darning his socks, she can plan dinners with his boss to assure rapid promotion and money. His "alpha" qualities will surely be rewarded.

Women have their own version. An undistinguished overweight woman gets an expensive degree in public interest law. She shuns blue-collar men and nerds with a mere 4-year STEM degree. She reads The Rules and makes a vision board of affirmations. After working a couple years at a cushy nonprofit job, she marries a tall, rich, handsome vampire and moves to Potomac or McLean. Or she becomes a billionaire by inventing Spanx and starring in a reality show.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One hat doesn't fit everyone, people have different circumstances, values, finances, life goals etc. There is no one perfect way to live life. Even if there was, it wouldn't perfectly fit everyone's life.

This.

Agree but the issue is that redpill ideology imposes sobering very niche and income/religion specific as ideal family setup on Americans.

Anonymous wrote:One hat doesn't fit everyone, people have different circumstances, values, finances, life goals etc. There is no one perfect way to live life. Even if there was, it wouldn't perfectly fit everyone's life.

This.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It works best among observant, conservative religions, like Mormons, Catholics, and Jews, where there is a ton of shame around premarital sex (among Mormons, fornication and adultery are very serious sins, second only to murder in gravity). In those religions, young men are highly motivated to marry young so they can have sex. If they come from wealthy families, they receive family support in their twenties as they finish school and have babies. It does often work in these populations.

Many of the trad wife influencers are Mormon, so this is spot on.

And the key word is "wealthy families"

I was just thinking that a lot of the Mormons I know actually lived off government assistance when they were first married. They had families and very little income while finishing school. They qualified for food stamps, Medicaid, WIC, etc.

There is a large underground Mormon homosexual male community in the DC area which includes a lot of married men. The majority of closeted men come from religious households. Don't be so sure a guy is straight just because he's dating you, is conservative, and wants to marry and have kids. They may want marriage and kids but want men on the side because their religion doesn't allow it. And if you are a SAHP its very hard to get out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It works best among observant, conservative religions, like Mormons, Catholics, and Jews, where there is a ton of shame around premarital sex (among Mormons, fornication and adultery are very serious sins, second only to murder in gravity). In those religions, young men are highly motivated to marry young so they can have sex. If they come from wealthy families, they receive family support in their twenties as they finish school and have babies. It does often work in these populations.

Many of the trad wife influencers are Mormon, so this is spot on.

And the key word is "wealthy families"

Anonymous wrote:It works best among observant, conservative religions, like Mormons, Catholics, and Jews, where there is a ton of shame around premarital sex (among Mormons, fornication and adultery are very serious sins, second only to murder in gravity). In those religions, young men are highly motivated to marry young so they can have sex. If they come from wealthy families, they receive family support in their twenties as they finish school and have babies. It does often work in these populations.

Many of the trad wife influencers are Mormon, so this is spot on.

Anonymous wrote:Funny how the OP mentions how hard it is to raise a family on one income yet constantly gets repeated how “women don’t need men anymore they make their own money”

How many child bearing age women (20’s) are earning 300k+?

And how many men can support a good standard of living for SAHM wives?

Funny how the OP mentions how hard it is to raise a family on one income yet constantly gets repeated how “women don’t need men anymore they make their own money”

How many child bearing age women (20’s) are earning 300k+?

Anonymous wrote:I am trad wife and my husband is the complete opposite of red pill. We are both pretty liberal.
He doesn’t demand that I am a housewife. It was a decision we made together. I wanted it and he was ok with that. The traditional “gender roles” come naturally to us and we just go with that.

It works for us without the need to follow some script or ideology.

We decided together that it made more sense for me to stay home with 3 kids and now I need to separate/divorce and am unable to earn enough to cover childcare. It sucks. All my fault, I know.

There can be abuse, resentment, unhappiness and injustice in trad or non trad marriages.

I became a SAHM with a fancy degree. He found a great job which moved us to several states and countries. We had kids, raised them, set up several homes, adapted to several cultures and arranged several national and international moves. Life was just fast and fun and busy. Once back in country, kids gone to colleges, there was no need to go back to work as there were investments and real estates to manage. It was not your standard life but you sure can label it as a trad set up.

One hat doesn't fit everyone, people have different circumstances, values, finances, life goals etc. There is no one perfect way to live life. Even if there was, it wouldn't perfectly fit everyone's life.