Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?

I can’t believe I’d even have to come up with a list for despising parenting because it seems extremely obvious.

First, I was never someone who wanted to have kids because I didn’t see the appeal. I was literally physically pressured into it.

It’s all work.
no joy.
no time.
too expensive.

Being a full-time employee and being a mother is probably the worst situation I could’ve ever imagined, and I never wanted to do it but that’s the situation I’m in. And let’s add on a terrible commute to that.

Anxiety levels raise when you have kids because you have to worry about everything that’s another reason it sucks. I have high anxiety anyway, so having kids makes it worse.

I’m also extremely introverted and honestly working full-time and having kids is just too much for an extremely introverted person. There are too many social commitments that come over along with having children. So that sucks.

I love them, but if I could go back in time and never get married, I absolutely would because then I wouldn’t have been physically pressured to have kids I didn’t want to have.

I am a great mom. I do everything right but I absolutely despise every second of it, and it’s like a countdown until they go to college but then I’m gonna be angry because I will be very old and I have wasted all this time doing things that I did not want to do versus the things that I actually want to spend my time doing, which was not raising children.

And no, it does not get easier for people who say it’s easier that’s just ridiculous.
The absolute easiest time having kids is when they’re from 0 to 5, and I had difficult babies from a health perspective, and I still think it was easier then. One kid is in fifth grade and one kid is in eighth grade and no it’s not easier. It’s much harder because the amount of scheduling that has to be done with older kids with extra curricular activities and school is out of control, and I suspect that until they go to college, it’s just going to get harder every single year as the demands for extracurricular activities and then later college applications are going to ramp up even more. So, no, it’s not easier when they get older. It’s just different.

They know that they don’t have to have kids and then there won’t be pressure for them to have kids and they can either have kids or not have kids, but I will not be pressuring them to be a grandmother ever.

You can be an excellent mother and still hate doing it and believe it or not there are people like this. I am one of them and both my grandmothers were like this, too.

You can love people, be a great parent, and not enjoy it.

So a lot of us find joy in parenting. I literally could not come up with a long list of the things I “despise” about parenting. I am shocked at your shock!

Here are some really enjoyable things about parenting:

Introducing kids to fun new things and watching them enjoy it
Spending time together (hikes, cooking, reading together etc )
The way sometimes they say really off the wall stuff that just surprises you
Watching them grow emotionally
Enjoying holiday traditions and other seasonal fun
When they want to talk to you all about their day or whatever their interests are

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?

I can’t believe I’d even have to come up with a list for despising parenting because it seems extremely obvious.

First, I was never someone who wanted to have kids because I didn’t see the appeal. I was literally physically pressured into it.

It’s all work.
no joy.
no time.
too expensive.

Being a full-time employee and being a mother is probably the worst situation I could’ve ever imagined, and I never wanted to do it but that’s the situation I’m in. And let’s add on a terrible commute to that.

Anxiety levels raise when you have kids because you have to worry about everything that’s another reason it sucks. I have high anxiety anyway, so having kids makes it worse.

I’m also extremely introverted and honestly working full-time and having kids is just too much for an extremely introverted person. There are too many social commitments that come over along with having children. So that sucks.

I love them, but if I could go back in time and never get married, I absolutely would because then I wouldn’t have been physically pressured to have kids I didn’t want to have.

I am a great mom. I do everything right but I absolutely despise every second of it, and it’s like a countdown until they go to college but then I’m gonna be angry because I will be very old and I have wasted all this time doing things that I did not want to do versus the things that I actually want to spend my time doing, which was not raising children.

And no, it does not get easier for people who say it’s easier that’s just ridiculous.
The absolute easiest time having kids is when they’re from 0 to 5, and I had difficult babies from a health perspective, and I still think it was easier then. One kid is in fifth grade and one kid is in eighth grade and no it’s not easier. It’s much harder because the amount of scheduling that has to be done with older kids with extra curricular activities and school is out of control, and I suspect that until they go to college, it’s just going to get harder every single year as the demands for extracurricular activities and then later college applications are going to ramp up even more. So, no, it’s not easier when they get older. It’s just different.

They know that they don’t have to have kids and then there won’t be pressure for them to have kids and they can either have kids or not have kids, but I will not be pressuring them to be a grandmother ever.

You can be an excellent mother and still hate doing it and believe it or not there are people like this. I am one of them and both my grandmothers were like this, too.

You can love people, be a great parent, and not enjoy it.

What a sad life.

I agree. It is sad: it sucks but I can’t do anything to change it.

You can do a lot to change it, you're choosing not to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?

I can’t believe I’d even have to come up with a list for despising parenting because it seems extremely obvious.

First, I was never someone who wanted to have kids because I didn’t see the appeal. I was literally physically pressured into it.

It’s all work.
no joy.
no time.
too expensive.

Being a full-time employee and being a mother is probably the worst situation I could’ve ever imagined, and I never wanted to do it but that’s the situation I’m in. And let’s add on a terrible commute to that.

Anxiety levels raise when you have kids because you have to worry about everything that’s another reason it sucks. I have high anxiety anyway, so having kids makes it worse.

I’m also extremely introverted and honestly working full-time and having kids is just too much for an extremely introverted person. There are too many social commitments that come over along with having children. So that sucks.

I love them, but if I could go back in time and never get married, I absolutely would because then I wouldn’t have been physically pressured to have kids I didn’t want to have.

I am a great mom. I do everything right but I absolutely despise every second of it, and it’s like a countdown until they go to college but then I’m gonna be angry because I will be very old and I have wasted all this time doing things that I did not want to do versus the things that I actually want to spend my time doing, which was not raising children.

And no, it does not get easier for people who say it’s easier that’s just ridiculous.
The absolute easiest time having kids is when they’re from 0 to 5, and I had difficult babies from a health perspective, and I still think it was easier then. One kid is in fifth grade and one kid is in eighth grade and no it’s not easier. It’s much harder because the amount of scheduling that has to be done with older kids with extra curricular activities and school is out of control, and I suspect that until they go to college, it’s just going to get harder every single year as the demands for extracurricular activities and then later college applications are going to ramp up even more. So, no, it’s not easier when they get older. It’s just different.

They know that they don’t have to have kids and then there won’t be pressure for them to have kids and they can either have kids or not have kids, but I will not be pressuring them to be a grandmother ever.

You can be an excellent mother and still hate doing it and believe it or not there are people like this. I am one of them and both my grandmothers were like this, too.

You can love people, be a great parent, and not enjoy it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?

I can’t believe I’d even have to come up with a list for despising parenting because it seems extremely obvious.

First, I was never someone who wanted to have kids because I didn’t see the appeal. I was literally physically pressured into it.

It’s all work.
no joy.
no time.
too expensive.

Being a full-time employee and being a mother is probably the worst situation I could’ve ever imagined, and I never wanted to do it but that’s the situation I’m in. And let’s add on a terrible commute to that.

Anxiety levels raise when you have kids because you have to worry about everything that’s another reason it sucks. I have high anxiety anyway, so having kids makes it worse.

I’m also extremely introverted and honestly working full-time and having kids is just too much for an extremely introverted person. There are too many social commitments that come over along with having children. So that sucks.

I love them, but if I could go back in time and never get married, I absolutely would because then I wouldn’t have been physically pressured to have kids I didn’t want to have.

I am a great mom. I do everything right but I absolutely despise every second of it, and it’s like a countdown until they go to college but then I’m gonna be angry because I will be very old and I have wasted all this time doing things that I did not want to do versus the things that I actually want to spend my time doing, which was not raising children.

And no, it does not get easier for people who say it’s easier that’s just ridiculous.
The absolute easiest time having kids is when they’re from 0 to 5, and I had difficult babies from a health perspective, and I still think it was easier then. One kid is in fifth grade and one kid is in eighth grade and no it’s not easier. It’s much harder because the amount of scheduling that has to be done with older kids with extra curricular activities and school is out of control, and I suspect that until they go to college, it’s just going to get harder every single year as the demands for extracurricular activities and then later college applications are going to ramp up even more. So, no, it’s not easier when they get older. It’s just different.

They know that they don’t have to have kids and then there won’t be pressure for them to have kids and they can either have kids or not have kids, but I will not be pressuring them to be a grandmother ever.

You can be an excellent mother and still hate doing it and believe it or not there are people like this. I am one of them and both my grandmothers were like this, too.

You can love people, be a great parent, and not enjoy it.

What a sad life.

I agree. It is sad: it sucks but I can’t do anything to change it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?

I can’t believe I’d even have to come up with a list for despising parenting because it seems extremely obvious.

First, I was never someone who wanted to have kids because I didn’t see the appeal. I was literally physically pressured into it.

It’s all work.
no joy.
no time.
too expensive.

Being a full-time employee and being a mother is probably the worst situation I could’ve ever imagined, and I never wanted to do it but that’s the situation I’m in. And let’s add on a terrible commute to that.

Anxiety levels raise when you have kids because you have to worry about everything that’s another reason it sucks. I have high anxiety anyway, so having kids makes it worse.

I’m also extremely introverted and honestly working full-time and having kids is just too much for an extremely introverted person. There are too many social commitments that come over along with having children. So that sucks.

I love them, but if I could go back in time and never get married, I absolutely would because then I wouldn’t have been physically pressured to have kids I didn’t want to have.

I am a great mom. I do everything right but I absolutely despise every second of it, and it’s like a countdown until they go to college but then I’m gonna be angry because I will be very old and I have wasted all this time doing things that I did not want to do versus the things that I actually want to spend my time doing, which was not raising children.

And no, it does not get easier for people who say it’s easier that’s just ridiculous.
The absolute easiest time having kids is when they’re from 0 to 5, and I had difficult babies from a health perspective, and I still think it was easier then. One kid is in fifth grade and one kid is in eighth grade and no it’s not easier. It’s much harder because the amount of scheduling that has to be done with older kids with extra curricular activities and school is out of control, and I suspect that until they go to college, it’s just going to get harder every single year as the demands for extracurricular activities and then later college applications are going to ramp up even more. So, no, it’s not easier when they get older. It’s just different.

They know that they don’t have to have kids and then there won’t be pressure for them to have kids and they can either have kids or not have kids, but I will not be pressuring them to be a grandmother ever.

You can be an excellent mother and still hate doing it and believe it or not there are people like this. I am one of them and both my grandmothers were like this, too.

You can love people, be a great parent, and not enjoy it.

What a sad life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?

I can’t believe I’d even have to come up with a list for despising parenting because it seems extremely obvious.

First, I was never someone who wanted to have kids because I didn’t see the appeal. I was literally physically pressured into it.

It’s all work.
no joy.
no time.
too expensive.

Being a full-time employee and being a mother is probably the worst situation I could’ve ever imagined, and I never wanted to do it but that’s the situation I’m in. And let’s add on a terrible commute to that.

Anxiety levels raise when you have kids because you have to worry about everything that’s another reason it sucks. I have high anxiety anyway, so having kids makes it worse.

I’m also extremely introverted and honestly working full-time and having kids is just too much for an extremely introverted person. There are too many social commitments that come over along with having children. So that sucks.

I love them, but if I could go back in time and never get married, I absolutely would because then I wouldn’t have been physically pressured to have kids I didn’t want to have.

I am a great mom. I do everything right but I absolutely despise every second of it, and it’s like a countdown until they go to college but then I’m gonna be angry because I will be very old and I have wasted all this time doing things that I did not want to do versus the things that I actually want to spend my time doing, which was not raising children.

And no, it does not get easier for people who say it’s easier that’s just ridiculous.
The absolute easiest time having kids is when they’re from 0 to 5, and I had difficult babies from a health perspective, and I still think it was easier then. One kid is in fifth grade and one kid is in eighth grade and no it’s not easier. It’s much harder because the amount of scheduling that has to be done with older kids with extra curricular activities and school is out of control, and I suspect that until they go to college, it’s just going to get harder every single year as the demands for extracurricular activities and then later college applications are going to ramp up even more. So, no, it’s not easier when they get older. It’s just different.

They know that they don’t have to have kids and then there won’t be pressure for them to have kids and they can either have kids or not have kids, but I will not be pressuring them to be a grandmother ever.

You can be an excellent mother and still hate doing it and believe it or not there are people like this. I am one of them and both my grandmothers were like this, too.

You can love people, be a great parent, and not enjoy it.

Anonymous wrote:It gets much easier, OP. My DCs are tweens & teens now and fun to be with. Hang in there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel you. I am a good parent. But I despise it. Honestly, it just feels like a prison sentence and I’m just counting down the years which is a terrible way to live, but that’s just the way it is. I have eight more years until they’re both in college at this point.

Why do you despise it?