Anonymous wrote:We live in North Arlington, and our local elementary starts at 9 AM. We are older parents in our 50s, and we both work so I go to work in person and dress business casual.

When I’m walking to drop off, I often see father’s dropping off their kids, and they are dressed in shorts and sweats and T-shirts, but they are younger like in their 30s early 40s.

Does everyone have a work at home job now except me? I thought we had RTO happening, or these dad’s going to work late after going home and changing first and getting there at like 930/10?

Our neighborhood is very expensive, I did not know they were that many jobs that paid that well to stay home in your sweats! Except maybe tech, but I am in tech and I’ve never met anyone else in our school that is in tech.

I guess they’re all in sales?

Not sure what everyone does, but my gym is packed any time of the day and so is the grocery store parking lot. Don’t people have to work?! I’m SAHM and no, I don’t believe all those people are also at home parents

Anonymous wrote:I was laid off from a big tech job last year. I was making $305k. A lot of us thought since we worked for very well known Tech shops we would be in high demand and still command the same kind of salaries we had in the past. 13 months and counting I am still unemployed. I turned down couple of jobs offering $120k and $180k respectively. If a similar offer comes again I'll take it. My point is if you make what you think is a big salary and think that's your market value from now on think again. I can't speak for lawyers CPAs etc apparently these guys will always make big salaries, but for some of us in Tech it's been a wake up call

100%. I was the PP who shared the big tech salaries. We know each day we make this $ (especially at our age) is a gift and doesn’t define us. We bought a house w a mortgage at 1x our HHI mortgage because of that to hedge our risk. I can’t stand when people tie their worth / status to a W2 salary that could end up being a fart in the wind.

I was laid off from a big tech job last year. I was making $305k. A lot of us thought since we worked for very well known Tech shops we would be in high demand and still command the same kind of salaries we had in the past. 13 months and counting I am still unemployed. I turned down couple of jobs offering $120k and $180k respectively. If a similar offer comes again I'll take it. My point is if you make what you think is a big salary and think that's your market value from now on think again. I can't speak for lawyers CPAs etc apparently these guys will always make big salaries, but for some of us in Tech it's been a wake up call

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a mom and stopped RTO because it was a time suck, so work from home. So I'm like those dads. Otherwise, I notice some parents stay at home or have very part-time jobs because the spouse makes $$$. Think spouse works at Amazon so mom can be a freelance graphic designer sort of thing. Some people negotiated fulltime WFH during Covid and got grandfathered in. Also, don't forget in expensive cities, a lot of people have generational wealth or some sort of leg up that affords them to not work full-time.

How much do you think people make at Amazon on average, that would allow them to have a stay at home spouse in the most expensive neighborhood of Arlington?

Not sure about Amazon, but DH is a manager at another big tech company and clears $500K before any stock appreciation with under 10 YOE. Directors (2 levels up, average age is probably around 40) are easily over $1M and VPs (mid 40s) are minimum $2M but most push $3-4M. And that’s before any stock gains. If you hit EVP you’re mid-7s or higher.

Let's remind people who may not be aware that this level of compensation is not Common. People with this level of compensation are an extremely small minority. This forum casually throws out these salaries as if it's common. Again these salaries are extremely RARE.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In your 50s with elementary school aged kids? Sounds awful.

You sound awful. I am 53 with a 10 year old. Our lives are awesome. I look like I am in my late 30s, am fit, healthy, have a great marriage and we financially secure for life. Take your ignorance somewhere else.

You had your first child at 43 dann?!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don’t really know much about people. I grew up in poverty. Have a mediocre job. My wife has not worked in almost 25 years as was a SAHM.

But I did have a very high paying job for a 13 year run and got a relo package to DC area back in 2017 and put a 60 percent downpayment on an expensive house.

I can live in a 2 million dollar house and be around as my job is BS and wife home. I have a 300k mortgage now as prepaid a bit with severance when lost big job and 8 years of mortgage payments.

And I already get questions as about to be empty Nestor soon, are you downsizing? As if I have a big mortgage? By then mortgage will be down to 200k and will just pay it off.

People who are stretched think others are too I noticed.

And I had a brief trip in tech and guess what I got 300k in stock those two years. Grant was way smaller back then buy now 300k. I also did a start up for awhile and still have 300k RSUs from that. Govt people or non profit people don’t realize those stock grants can make paying for things easy.

This. Our friends were shocked to learn we were buying our move up home and keeping our starter home as a rental. They assumed we had maxed out our DTI with the purchase of the starter home alone like they all did.

Really? That’s pretty standard unless you are some striver from the sticks still paying off student loans. It’s a govt subsidized loan for investments; it’s the best thing going since it doesn’t take any additional capital generally.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone I know in the private sector in DC teleworks 2-5 days per week. Some of their companies have stated publicly that they are back in the office 5 days per week -- that is obviously false.

This is my neighbors. Private sector has lots of WFH still, unless you're in Big Tech or banking/CRE. If they have to go into the office for big meetings, there's a town car waiting for them.

This. Most private industry people wfh, especially in tech.

So in summary it seems like only the feds RTO, and contractors.

I have no idea why it became a contest about who makes the most money by working the least. It’s pretty well documented that people who have very high salaries often have the most autonomy in their roles.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone I know in the private sector in DC teleworks 2-5 days per week. Some of their companies have stated publicly that they are back in the office 5 days per week -- that is obviously false.

This is my neighbors. Private sector has lots of WFH still, unless you're in Big Tech or banking/CRE. If they have to go into the office for big meetings, there's a town car waiting for them.

I have lots of meetings with big tech. While I know they have to go into the office occasionally, they're always working from home when I see them.

Anonymous wrote:Everyone I know in the private sector in DC teleworks 2-5 days per week. Some of their companies have stated publicly that they are back in the office 5 days per week -- that is obviously false.

This is my neighbors. Private sector has lots of WFH still, unless you're in Big Tech or banking/CRE. If they have to go into the office for big meetings, there's a town car waiting for them.

Anonymous wrote:You don’t really know much about people. I grew up in poverty. Have a mediocre job. My wife has not worked in almost 25 years as was a SAHM.

But I did have a very high paying job for a 13 year run and got a relo package to DC area back in 2017 and put a 60 percent downpayment on an expensive house.

I can live in a 2 million dollar house and be around as my job is BS and wife home. I have a 300k mortgage now as prepaid a bit with severance when lost big job and 8 years of mortgage payments.

And I already get questions as about to be empty Nestor soon, are you downsizing? As if I have a big mortgage? By then mortgage will be down to 200k and will just pay it off.

People who are stretched think others are too I noticed.

And I had a brief trip in tech and guess what I got 300k in stock those two years. Grant was way smaller back then buy now 300k. I also did a start up for awhile and still have 300k RSUs from that. Govt people or non profit people don’t realize those stock grants can make paying for things easy.

This. Our friends were shocked to learn we were buying our move up home and keeping our starter home as a rental. They assumed we had maxed out our DTI with the purchase of the starter home alone like they all did.

You don’t really know much about people. I grew up in poverty. Have a mediocre job. My wife has not worked in almost 25 years as was a SAHM.

But I did have a very high paying job for a 13 year run and got a relo package to DC area back in 2017 and put a 60 percent downpayment on an expensive house.

I can live in a 2 million dollar house and be around as my job is BS and wife home. I have a 300k mortgage now as prepaid a bit with severance when lost big job and 8 years of mortgage payments.

And I already get questions as about to be empty Nestor soon, are you downsizing? As if I have a big mortgage? By then mortgage will be down to 200k and will just pay it off.

People who are stretched think others are too I noticed.

And I had a brief trip in tech and guess what I got 300k in stock those two years. Grant was way smaller back then buy now 300k. I also did a start up for awhile and still have 300k RSUs from that. Govt people or non profit people don’t realize those stock grants can make paying for things easy.

They could be contract lobbyists who work from home when they are not in the Hill. Those people can afford very nice homes!!!!

Anonymous wrote:Yes, there are lots of WFH jobs still in full force. Most others work a hybrid schedule. So you’re seeing these people on their WFH days, whether that’s 5 days/week or 2days/week. No one is dressing business casual so they can WFH.

Guess I'm "no one" because I dress in business casual to work at home. Then again, I'm the boss.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a mom and stopped RTO because it was a time suck, so work from home. So I'm like those dads. Otherwise, I notice some parents stay at home or have very part-time jobs because the spouse makes $$$. Think spouse works at Amazon so mom can be a freelance graphic designer sort of thing. Some people negotiated fulltime WFH during Covid and got grandfathered in. Also, don't forget in expensive cities, a lot of people have generational wealth or some sort of leg up that affords them to not work full-time.

How much do you think people make at Amazon on average, that would allow them to have a stay at home spouse in the most expensive neighborhood of Arlington?

Not sure about Amazon, but DH is a manager at another big tech company and clears $500K before any stock appreciation with under 10 YOE. Directors (2 levels up, average age is probably around 40) are easily over $1M and VPs (mid 40s) are minimum $2M but most push $3-4M. And that’s before any stock gains. If you hit EVP you’re mid-7s or higher.

PP here - forgot to add those #s are for non technical roles. I’d multiply by 1.5 - 2 for technical roles at each level eg SWE Manager should be around $600-750K etc.