Anonymous
04/13/2025 06:55
Subject: How to get out of debt!
This forum has been great in the past in helping people with a budget but in order to do that here OP needs to list her ENTIRE monthly expenses, item for item. If she doesn’t know exactly where all her money is going it is impossible to help her and she’s just a hamster in a wheel spinning and not going anywhere.
So if OP is serious about asking for help, then list ALL of your expenses. Not piece meal, not just your car, rent and total CC debt. ALL of your expenses. If you don’t know what they are, then now is the time to figure that out.
No one can give constructive advice. You are not being honest nor open to change. Want to change your situation, then let’s do that but you are on the drivers seat here. A man is not a plan. Stop making excuses and take control of your life. It’s not too late.
So if OP is serious about asking for help, then list ALL of your expenses. Not piece meal, not just your car, rent and total CC debt. ALL of your expenses. If you don’t know what they are, then now is the time to figure that out.
No one can give constructive advice. You are not being honest nor open to change. Want to change your situation, then let’s do that but you are on the drivers seat here. A man is not a plan. Stop making excuses and take control of your life. It’s not too late.
Anonymous
04/13/2025 03:12
Subject: Re:How to get out of debt!
OP, you are 42 years old. That isn't old enough to be decrepit, but it is old enough that you need to take your physical condition into account in looking for jobs.
I think you may need to try to find a less physically demanding job. I don't know all about nursing though. I know many nurse positions do require a lot of stamina - but others could be easier on the body. So you need to think about those.
You are probably going to need to stay employed until at least age 67 or so. So start thinking about that now. What jobs can you keep working at for at least 20 more years?
You ABSOLUTELY need to look into Disability Insurance. If something happened to your ability to work, what would you live off of? You need to buy a policy.
You may need to move to a job with a large employer in order to find a disability insurance policy you can afford. A large hospital system? County/State/federal government work? I don't know what is out there.
But that is step #1 in my book. You need a sustainable job, and you need disability insurance as well. You may need to move to find it - and you may need to move away from family for a while.
You don't have anyone to move in with (like parents, family) if you lose your housing. That's the only reason I don't think you should file for bankruptcy. Otherwise, I would do that. But you need a place where you can live, and if you credit is shot you will have a hard time being able to rent.
Focus on finding a job that puts less stress on your body.
I think you may need to try to find a less physically demanding job. I don't know all about nursing though. I know many nurse positions do require a lot of stamina - but others could be easier on the body. So you need to think about those.
You are probably going to need to stay employed until at least age 67 or so. So start thinking about that now. What jobs can you keep working at for at least 20 more years?
You ABSOLUTELY need to look into Disability Insurance. If something happened to your ability to work, what would you live off of? You need to buy a policy.
You may need to move to a job with a large employer in order to find a disability insurance policy you can afford. A large hospital system? County/State/federal government work? I don't know what is out there.
But that is step #1 in my book. You need a sustainable job, and you need disability insurance as well. You may need to move to find it - and you may need to move away from family for a while.
You don't have anyone to move in with (like parents, family) if you lose your housing. That's the only reason I don't think you should file for bankruptcy. Otherwise, I would do that. But you need a place where you can live, and if you credit is shot you will have a hard time being able to rent.
Focus on finding a job that puts less stress on your body.
Anonymous
04/12/2025 22:57
Subject: How to get out of debt!
I think Op tried but fiance is smart and didn’t get into her BS.
Anonymous
04/12/2025 13:47
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Anonymous wrote:Would it make any difference if OP starts making $45/hr after her education and becomes an RN? I am not sure how her holding off on paying some of the debt is going to affect the debt. The way she’s going, it could be a little worse than what she’s in today but dies the increase in future income worth it?
Debt will be much higher by that time so not sure if going to school currently make sense.
Anonymous
04/12/2025 13:46
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have about $55K of credit card debt and $27K of auto loan. Overall, my minimum monthly payments are about $2700-2800 when my take home per month is about $4500 as a nurse making $60-65K/year. On top of debt, I still have to pay rent, utilities, groceries, gas, etc. I stay very depressed that I would never be able to get out of this. I want to go back to school to get advance nursing degree(paid by hospital) but have to adjust on my hours.
I am 42F and single.
She already had that with her fiancé but messed it up. If he was her fiancé then there was love too but still it wasn’t worth it got her.
Also, she’s always tired so not sure how much energy she has left for sex. It’s not that easy at this age, workload and all the stress.
You need to find yourself a man to sex up a lot and get him to pay for your stuff
Anonymous
04/12/2025 11:27
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Work more hours and get a second job and stop spending. I bet you have no idea what interest you pay on those CC am I right?
Anonymous
04/12/2025 11:19
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Anonymous wrote:I have about $55K of credit card debt and $27K of auto loan. Overall, my minimum monthly payments are about $2700-2800 when my take home per month is about $4500 as a nurse making $60-65K/year. On top of debt, I still have to pay rent, utilities, groceries, gas, etc. I stay very depressed that I would never be able to get out of this. I want to go back to school to get advance nursing degree(paid by hospital) but have to adjust on my hours.
I am 42F and single.
You need to find yourself a man to sex up a lot and get him to pay for your stuff
Anonymous
04/12/2025 11:18
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Would it make any difference if OP starts making $45/hr after her education and becomes an RN? I am not sure how her holding off on paying some of the debt is going to affect the debt. The way she’s going, it could be a little worse than what she’s in today but dies the increase in future income worth it?
Anonymous
04/11/2025 23:46
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My car is Camry hybrid XSE. I am selling my stuff and not buying anything new. I am becoming a minimalist. I could hv done uber but there are not a lot of uber opportunities in my town. I don’t eat out and don’t spend money on nails, hair etc. my expenses sometimes are for my medications, co-pays, etc.
OP, I’m so sorry to hear not only are you going for that through this but that so many people on this thread are just terrible human beings. I hear you standing on your feet all day is exhausting. Maybe you could get some overnight caregiving through a company that provides respite.
That sounds like a really tough situation but hang in there.
How would op do overnight caregiving after doing long shifts during the day?
Anonymous
04/11/2025 23:45
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Anonymous wrote:Sorry to be mean, but good for him if he is thinking of breaking up with you- you sound like a person owns zero responsibility for herself. WAKE UP.
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I do have 403(b) from the hospital but it’s not a lot so not cashing that out right now.
I am also negotiating with CC companies and trying to get a balance transfer to a new card for initial low APR.
Other than money, there were issues with my fiance and I think he got frustrated with me working and not having enough time for the relationship. He’s also 1.5 hrs away and stay with him was comfortable and he was supportive but got resentful that my debt is coming in the way of the relationship and threw it on my face a few times which was upsetting. I am very stressed now with everything I have to deal with along with rent at new place.
Op, what you really wanted from your fiance? You have to bring enough to the table too and were you asking him to pay your debt?
Anonymous
04/11/2025 17:11
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Anonymous wrote:My car is Camry hybrid XSE. I am selling my stuff and not buying anything new. I am becoming a minimalist. I could hv done uber but there are not a lot of uber opportunities in my town. I don’t eat out and don’t spend money on nails, hair etc. my expenses sometimes are for my medications, co-pays, etc.
OP, I’m so sorry to hear not only are you going for that through this but that so many people on this thread are just terrible human beings. I hear you standing on your feet all day is exhausting. Maybe you could get some overnight caregiving through a company that provides respite.
That sounds like a really tough situation but hang in there.
Anonymous
04/11/2025 11:28
Subject: How to get out of debt!
Sorry to be mean, but good for him if he is thinking of breaking up with you- you sound like a person owns zero responsibility for herself. WAKE UP.
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I do have 403(b) from the hospital but it’s not a lot so not cashing that out right now.
I am also negotiating with CC companies and trying to get a balance transfer to a new card for initial low APR.
Other than money, there were issues with my fiance and I think he got frustrated with me working and not having enough time for the relationship. He’s also 1.5 hrs away and stay with him was comfortable and he was supportive but got resentful that my debt is coming in the way of the relationship and threw it on my face a few times which was upsetting. I am very stressed now with everything I have to deal with along with rent at new place.
Anonymous
04/11/2025 11:23
Subject: How to get out of debt!
when I was making this much, my car was a $5800 used car, rent was $400 a month including everything, and every meal was made at home.
Anonymous
04/10/2025 19:35
Subject: How to get out of debt!
OP, you’ll have to make more than the minimum payment every month to get your credit cards paid off. You’re just treading water by paying just the minimum.
If you can’t work 7 days a week, at least work one extra day a week. You’ll get yourself out of debt faster if you can do more. Just don’t do nothing.
Put most of that extra income towards your credit card debt, but also start a savings account for an emergency fund, so you won’t always be at the mercy of credit cards. So if can make an extra $400/month, use $300 to pay down the cc and put $100 in the emergency fund.
The first few months may feel hard, but you’ll start to feel better when you see that you’re making progress.
If you can’t work 7 days a week, at least work one extra day a week. You’ll get yourself out of debt faster if you can do more. Just don’t do nothing.
Put most of that extra income towards your credit card debt, but also start a savings account for an emergency fund, so you won’t always be at the mercy of credit cards. So if can make an extra $400/month, use $300 to pay down the cc and put $100 in the emergency fund.
The first few months may feel hard, but you’ll start to feel better when you see that you’re making progress.
Anonymous
04/09/2025 21:36
Subject: How to get out of debt!
My car is Camry hybrid XSE. I am selling my stuff and not buying anything new. I am becoming a minimalist. I could hv done uber but there are not a lot of uber opportunities in my town. I don’t eat out and don’t spend money on nails, hair etc. my expenses sometimes are for my medications, co-pays, etc.