Anonymous wrote:I’ve lived here all of my life other than college and here’s where my 12 closest friends met their spouse:

-Work (law firm) (2)
-Work (journalism)
-Grad School (Med)
-Grad School (Business)
-Undergrad (Williams of course)
-High School! Insane. They’ve been together since junior year.
-Coed adult basketball league
-Random karaoke bar in Alexandria
-Random bar while on work trip in Kansas City
-Online (It was tinder, but they claim otherwise. Ha.)
-Setup by sister with a work friend

This is a good exercise but the average DCUMer including myself are middle aged.

My group (skewed due to mostly religious):
- Undergrad (3)
- Grad school (2)
- Working abroad
- Church and related activities (5)
- Dancing/concert (2)
- Bar
- Community music group
- OLD (3)


Younger friends:
- OLD (4)
- Work

Party or gathering hosted by mutual friends, set up by friends, or possibly gym or activity you mutually enjoy.

Swingers Party

Anonymous wrote:Ritz Carlton hotel bar.

Also some of the area's finer eating and drinking establishments. Try places like The Del Bar, McSweeney's, Goose & Goat, The Traveller, Donna's Mixing Bowl, Caliber 777, or Lavatash.

Online you can filter everything and pick- why doesn't Op want that?

Target

Growing up, my uncle had an annual golf fundraiser for his employer. I volunteered one year and it was packed with men of all ages.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meeting a man in line with your own values should be your highest priority, especially if you're Christian. That can be easier said than done depending on the church; you may need to change demographics accordingly (e.g. moving to PA or IN to meet eligible young Catholic men).

Otherwise, outdoor hobbies like hiking or kayaking groups are your best bet. You're most likely to meet fit, attractive, motivated men that way; depressives aren't regularly engaged in those hobbies.

Good call in avoiding OLD. You do not meet high value people on those sites.

Where does one find these hiking or kayaking groups? I’ve only seen ones sponsored by LL Bean many years ago.

REI has them too.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have a great answer to OPs question but I think the response about the hot foods bar at Whole Foods will be a DCUM hall of famer. What a visual.

Truly, at the Whole Foods in Silver Spring, a homeless man stole my container of mac & cheese when I set it down to get a seperate container for broccoli.

Absolutely no prospects at SS WF, so you can also cross that one off your list.

P Street will have mostly gay men with some lesbians mixed in.

Pp here. I’m actually curious to hear how people here met spouses not online. I met mine in college - I ran into a woman I sort of knew at a house party and my husband (who knew her better) came over to say hi to her at the same time. She introduced us.

My in-laws were set up in a date by a friend (Navy nurse and Nay officer). My uncle and my dad were buddies in grad school. My dad came to visit my uncle in his hometown and my mom was home from college too. She came down to breakfast and my dad was at the dining room table 😂

I’m a married woman. I feel like the challenge would be knowing if men were single. I was trying to by shower sealant at the hardware store and couldn’t reach it, asked for help, and the man and I struck up a good conversation. At the grocery store recently I grabbed a basket a man had just put away. He said “oh, how rude of me, I should have handed that to you.” I feel like a witty retort there could have started a conversation. Weirdly, two of my best conversations were with men I met on public transit (also have had good conversations on flights). One ran after me and gave me his number, but I was already dating my now DH. It would have been quite the meet cute - the T (Boston) suddenly stopped and I lost my balance. He reached out an arm to stop me from falling and dropped his book - a John Adams biography. I was reading the same biography (we both had it with us).

My house. Summer pool parties.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Probably at work. Maybe you have different hobbies than my friends and I, but no one I knew met their significant other during their hobby time. They met in college or at work, or a related internship. I met my husband during an internship in college. We worked in the same research lab.

The workplace is not your personal dating meat market. This is no longer acceptable. #metoo

Sorry, it will always happen. Whether or not you find it acceptable will depend on the era and your particular workplace. But don't be stupid - for a lot of people, work is where they spend most of their waking hours, and where they're most likely to find a mate. It would be utterly idiotic to deny yourself, or others, the opportunity to find a spouse at work.

It’s way too risky for a guy to even try to date a coworker in a professional environment. So much can go wrong.

Again, no office rules will ever stamp down hormones and biological instincts. I don't know any way to make it clearer to you people. Maybe it's because I'm a biologist that I understand this and you don't. Or maybe the difference is just that I refuse to pathologize or criminalize normal, healthy, human reactions.

Clearly you dont' work in the HR department!

Anonymous wrote:Go have an early (after work/happy hour) dinner at the bar of an upscale restaurant (NOT a hotel bar).

Middle Ages woman dressed up eating alone a “upscale” restaurant bar screams desperate and searching

Anonymous wrote:Running in parks with my headphones on. When I was in my 20s, I ran after work and always had nice, attractive men stopping to tie their shoe near me making eye contact, smiling and inviting a conversation with me if I wanted it. When my kid turned into a teenager and I had more time to resume running after work hours in the park I experienced the same thing. I'm mean at 48, 49, 50. Same deal. I had a wedding ring on. Not too pushy. Would notice I had a ring on and just be casual after that. I mean with "grey highlights" no less . Met my husband at the shared bus stop to campus 30 years ago but this is what I recommend to friends and what I would do if I wanted to meet someone nice, normal and healthy.

You have a very high opinion of yourself. It’s good you have confidence. I’m also confident.

Runners, bikers, hikers, walkers, dog walkers are all friendly. I’m your same age and smile at men, women and children and often strike up conversations with others. I have to be in the mood to talk. Sometimes I’m in the zone and don’t want to be bothered. Other times I’m in a more friendly mood. But yes, being fit and active will allow you to meet others who are also fit and active.