Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 23:05     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:I am Middle Eastern and people constantly assume I am Latina because I have similar coloring to someone like Salma Hayek. I am not offended; I just wish I paid more attention in high school Spanish.

Something horrible that I noticed especially after having children is that if I dared to go out looking less than stylish or with my hair curly people in stores would always speak to me in Spanish. If I am dressed up, makeup, with straight hair, always English. This made me feel very weird and I started making sure I look “nice” when I go out. After I lost about 30 pounds of baby weight no one ever speaks to me in Spanish anymore.


Funny you say that because Salma Hayek is Middle Eastern.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 23:04     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Two ethnicities I find very easy to guess are Ethiopian and Filipino, with the latter being especially easy to guess if last name is known. I work in healthcare, so I have a lot of colleagues from both countries.


Can you tell them from Eritreans and Laotians?


Different poster I think I could though. I've been around the four of them for the last 40 years haha
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 23:02     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:I am Middle Eastern and people constantly assume I am Latina because I have similar coloring to someone like Salma Hayek. I am not offended; I just wish I paid more attention in high school Spanish.

Something horrible that I noticed especially after having children is that if I dared to go out looking less than stylish or with my hair curly people in stores would always speak to me in Spanish. If I am dressed up, makeup, with straight hair, always English. This made me feel very weird and I started making sure I look “nice” when I go out. After I lost about 30 pounds of baby weight no one ever speaks to me in Spanish anymore.


Lmao. I'm Latina and the same thing happens to me. The thinner and nicer I look the more I get spoken to in english than spanish.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 18:56     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
I am Middle Eastern and people constantly assume I am Latina because I have similar coloring to someone like Salma Hayek. I am not offended; I just wish I paid more attention in high school Spanish.

Something horrible that I noticed especially after having children is that if I dared to go out looking less than stylish or with my hair curly people in stores would always speak to me in Spanish. If I am dressed up, makeup, with straight hair, always English. This made me feel very weird and I started making sure I look “nice” when I go out. After I lost about 30 pounds of baby weight no one ever speaks to me in Spanish anymore.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 18:47     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
A few weeks back, I asked a guy who interacts with me at work but doesn't directly work with me if he had plans to attend an upcoming conference.

The conference was geared toward African American employees; I am AA, and I assumed he was too. He looked confused by my question and then said no. While he does have a very light complexion, I assumed he was Black. The confused look he gave answered my question.

I meant no harm and was just making light convo.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 18:06     Subject: Re:If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:A friend of mine has a very ambiguous racially look. And when I'm out with her, it is amazing how many different nationalities of people come up to her and speak in their language to her assuming she can speak it. She just smiles and lets them know she does not speak the language.


This is sweet and seems to be from a place of wanting to include your friend. I don’t really understand though generally why anyone has to guess my ethnicity. Like, why is it a topic of conversation?


Why is it off limits/sensitive?

It is just part of your story . Why take offense?



DO: Why “guess” — which is rude, when you can ask? If you don’t know someone well enough to ask then maybe your curiosity shouldn’t be satisfied.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 16:28     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Two ethnicities I find very easy to guess are Ethiopian and Filipino, with the latter being especially easy to guess if last name is known. I work in healthcare, so I have a lot of colleagues from both countries.


Can you tell them from Eritreans and Laotians?
I also wondered this after reading that comment.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 16:19     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:I usually correctly guess people race and nationalities but was fooled recently. I speak Chinese and heard two people speaking Chinese. I asked which province they were from, and they responded that they were actually South Korean but met at university in China.


That's why you also shouldn't assume.

We live in a global society. Don't assume that white person doesn't understand Korean or Chinese.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 16:14     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:I’m Australian and people often ask if I’m British. I don’t get too offended.



You have the accent and they can’t place it?
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 16:08     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:Two ethnicities I find very easy to guess are Ethiopian and Filipino, with the latter being especially easy to guess if last name is known. I work in healthcare, so I have a lot of colleagues from both countries.


Can you tell them from Eritreans and Laotians?
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 15:59     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:I did see a Filipino lady give a Hispanic woman the death stare when she spoke completely in Spanish to her


Some of them speak Spanish especially the older ones
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 15:58     Subject: Re:If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
No one has to guess where I'm from but what I don't like is being made fun of. Many assume I'm ignorant too.
So instead of getting upset I just flow on through and ask God to fix their rude behavior.
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 15:54     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
I have red hair and am Irish-American, but it’s not unusual (at least on the east coast) for people to assume that I’m Jewish!
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 15:03     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:People keep asking me if I'm Irish, and I don't know why. I do have big blue eyes, and I guess that's why. I am far from Irish, lol. Why would I get offended? I've had some pleasant chats with people around the subject.


Exactly, it can lead to some great conversations.

People have gotten ridiculously reactive around such topics.

The offense is all in their head!
Anonymous
Post 03/16/2024 15:01     Subject: If someone guesses your nationality or race wrong do you get offended?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The fact they are verbally guessing your nationality/race is rude and offensive.


This. Where is OP going that people are gawking and yelling out guesses?


No one said “gawking” or “yelling.”

You are really prone to hyperbole, and might want to work on that.