Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gold diggers have been around since the beginning of time. This will NEVER change. Get an airtight pre-nup if thinking of marrying and you have any money.

+1. I can't imaigne anyone with one or more sons feeling otherwise. These posts make me sick.

Stupid. My in-laws adore me and know that I am a huge asset to their son, even though I don’t work. They adore me. Sharing their money with me is not upsetting to them in the least. They want their grandkids to have a nice life, and I am a big part of that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So for the people who said they married for money, does that they didn’t marry for love? I didn’t “marry for money” though DH is well educated and reasonably successful. We met in college and, well, love each other a lot! We love hanging out together, get along great, support each other and make each other happy. The idea that some of you just want the money your spouse provides seems, uh, sad?

But if you saying you truly love your spouse and they happen to be loaded, then great. You win!

I think you’re being intentionally silly because playing the ingenue has payed off so well for you.

Sure, we believe you, you absolutely did not care that your husband’s education/college was likely to lead to a lucrative career. I’m sure you were dating unemployed philosophers before you met him.

He was actually my first boyfriend and we went to college together. So yeah I guess if you mean I chose him rather than going to some other campus to meet other guys who went to a worse college, then yeah, clever play on my part.

There is always a 50/50 chance of failure with potential so unless one loves and respect their GF/BF, no reason to signup for a decade of struggle, materialist shouldn't settle but look for someone older whose potential already materialized and waltz into their preferred lifestyle. Why take risk if you don't love?

Anonymous wrote:My advice to my son: if you are dumb enough to get married, make sure she earns at least as much as you do.

+1. Exactly. There are some lazy women out there, for sure. Beware.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 25 few people are wealthy unless born into it. You marry someone for many reasons including the potential to have a good career. We have plenty of wealthy friends and none of them were born into it. At the same time plenty of people never achieve their potential.

This. Most people are meeting their spouses in their 20s. They aren't rich yet. They may be in law school or med school, junior bankers, etc. and have potential. But plenty of junior biglaw associates never make the big bucks as partner.

I am mid 40s. Most people I know met their spouses in their 30s. NOT their 20s.

If you are "b" team, you meet your spouse in your 30s, the "a" team roster is already filled.

This is so inaccurate.

Nah some of the A team will get divorced and be available for the second round draft. And they may even be housebroken.

You are gross.

Anonymous wrote:Gold diggers have been around since the beginning of time. This will NEVER change. Get an airtight pre-nup if thinking of marrying and you have any money.

+1. I can't imaigne anyone with one or more sons feeling otherwise. These posts make me sick.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 25 few people are wealthy unless born into it. You marry someone for many reasons including the potential to have a good career. We have plenty of wealthy friends and none of them were born into it. At the same time plenty of people never achieve their potential.

This. Most people are meeting their spouses in their 20s. They aren't rich yet. They may be in law school or med school, junior bankers, etc. and have potential. But plenty of junior biglaw associates never make the big bucks as partner.

I am mid 40s. Most people I know met their spouses in their 30s. NOT their 20s.

If you are "b" team, you meet your spouse in your 30s, the "a" team roster is already filled.

This is so inaccurate.

Nah some of the A team will get divorced and be available for the second round draft. And they may even be housebroken.

Marry whenever but if you find your person early while there is no money or success, stay with them if you can as once you cross 35 and become successful, all you get are people making calculated decisions. They are jaded with burden of broken relationships, propelled by social pressure, and afraid of looming expiry dates. Not that you are absolutely doomed but statistically its very likely.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 25 few people are wealthy unless born into it. You marry someone for many reasons including the potential to have a good career. We have plenty of wealthy friends and none of them were born into it. At the same time plenty of people never achieve their potential.

This. Most people are meeting their spouses in their 20s. They aren't rich yet. They may be in law school or med school, junior bankers, etc. and have potential. But plenty of junior biglaw associates never make the big bucks as partner.

I am mid 40s. Most people I know met their spouses in their 30s. NOT their 20s.

If you are "b" team, you meet your spouse in your 30s, the "a" team roster is already filled.

This is so inaccurate.

No, this is true. The market value of a woman declines after 30.

Only to a man under 30. The nice truth is that as women get older their dating and attraction range tends to increase so at try women remain attractive to people they are attracted to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So for the people who said they married for money, does that they didn’t marry for love? I didn’t “marry for money” though DH is well educated and reasonably successful. We met in college and, well, love each other a lot! We love hanging out together, get along great, support each other and make each other happy. The idea that some of you just want the money your spouse provides seems, uh, sad?

But if you saying you truly love your spouse and they happen to be loaded, then great. You win!

I married for love. But I never dated, let alone fell in love with, anyone who didn't have a significant amount of money. The money was necessary but not sufficient.

That's marrying for money.

No that’s having a good head on your shoulders. It’s just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor man.

When we got married at 26 and 27 we both had very good jobs and our financial future was very bright but money wasn’t why we were attracted to each other. Many years later we have a great deal of money and while that’s wonderful that’s not why we are still in love. All of the others things that attracted us to each other 30 years ago are still there and maybe even more so. Having money certainly takes pressure off of a marriage and that’s no small thing.

Anecdotal story: Several friends married for love, looks, friendship, wealth or potential, results were really mixed. Almost all marriages based on wealth failed or didn't inherit much. Some materialized their potential, others didn't, some stayed in love, others didn't. Looks didn't help with fights and eventually faded. Every single marriage based on friendship and attraction, survived and strengthened. Most relationships started in early 20's, friends built happy families and good careers together, now aging together and enjoying empty nesting.

Lesson: Marry people you love and respect and can live within peace as money, looks and success doesn't have as much value for making life happier compared to a good bond and good character.

Everything changes but kindness, conciseness, emotional intelligence remain.

I didn't but wish I did

This definitely happens now, people are just less upfront about it because it is frowned upon in modern society. Most people end up within their class background. This is partly because there is an unspoken expectation, (especially among affluent families) that their kids will partner with someone that has sufficient educational background, earnings potential and family wealth. Upper class families publicly promote tolerance, but their private behavior/expectations do match publicly expressed ideals.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So for the people who said they married for money, does that they didn’t marry for love? I didn’t “marry for money” though DH is well educated and reasonably successful. We met in college and, well, love each other a lot! We love hanging out together, get along great, support each other and make each other happy. The idea that some of you just want the money your spouse provides seems, uh, sad?

But if you saying you truly love your spouse and they happen to be loaded, then great. You win!

I think you’re being intentionally silly because playing the ingenue has payed off so well for you.

Sure, we believe you, you absolutely did not care that your husband’s education/college was likely to lead to a lucrative career. I’m sure you were dating unemployed philosophers before you met him.

He was actually my first boyfriend and we went to college together. So yeah I guess if you mean I chose him rather than going to some other campus to meet other guys who went to a worse college, then yeah, clever play on my part.

Gold diggers have been around since the beginning of time. This will NEVER change. Get an airtight pre-nup if thinking of marrying and you have any money.