There are relatively cushy teaching jobs and high stress ones and everything in between. The problem is they are all paid on the same scale. I SAH many years and only went back once I secured a “cushy” one. I’ll be the first to admit there are others in my school that should make more money than I do, but I don’t make the rules.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher, it is difficult to hear that this is how you see us. I won’t make this reply about that though.

I would not encourage my kids to go into teaching. Not because I think it is settling or selling themselves short in any way because I don’t believe those things about teachers. I wouldn’t encourage it because the pay is not enough to support them or a family if they were to be without a partner.

If any of my kids told me they wanted to be a teacher, I would be proud of them for wanting to do meaningful work that leaves the world a better place. But I’d also encourage them to find a way to do that while earning a better income.

+ 1

My mom was a teacher and a pretty amazing one. She preferred to work in low income/high immigrant communities and dedicated her time and money to giving the best possible to her students. Parents raved about her and her students always had significant improvements in test scores. But when my niece said she wanted to be a teacher, my mom talked her out of it. She explained the job was high stress, undervalued and very underpaid. She wanted more financial stability for her granddaughter. Ultimately, my niece, who is great with kids, went into nursing and plans to work in the NICU or PICU with kids. It’s still high stress but she will be able to support herself well even without a partner.

Our high-achieving DC always wanted to be a teacher....and has been talked out of it by their esteemed teachers. And I mean that sincerely. We've been greatly blessed with an extraordinary number of extraordinary teachers. But every. single. one. has said -- don't do it.

So the pivot is to nursing, for now -- even though several close friends and family members who are nurses have likewise tried to dissuade our child. The plan is to double major in nursing and music therapy or (gasp) music education.

Strikingly, little of the advice has been because of money. It's all about the working conditions -- the hours, the stress, the heartache, the paperwork(!). Both sets acknowledge, however, there will always be a need for teachers and nurses.

It will not surprise us if, five years post BSN, our DC will be in a school. Somewhere. In the clinic, band room, or classroom. With us as their biggest cheerleaders!

OP, please try to find a way to embrace your child's path. There's nothing wrong with pointing out the potential pitfalls along the way but your issue seems more about whether the profession is good enough for your child. That's a different matter altogether.

The problem is that people in a profession often have little perspective of what other jobs are like. I've also heard many doctors and lawyers try to dissuade kids from pursuing those careers, and for similar reasons-- stress, bad employers, paperwork. Plus the high cost of the education required.

Education, by comparison, has low barriers to entry. A teaching certification takes significantly less time and money to acquire than many other professionals degrees. This makes it lower risk-- try it, if you hate it, pivot to something else. If you love it, get a master's to max out your earning. The flexibility of this path is appealing, IMO.

As for prestige... It's overrated. I'm a mid career lawyer and the prestige of a career gets undercut by your experience within it. My job sounds prestigious to outsiders and I do make a decent income. But the reality is that I'm not treated that well by my employer or my clients, I have low job satisfaction, and I only recently started seeing real financial returns on the investment in my education, because of the time it took me to pay off law school and then build up savings. And my hours are long and the job is high stress. The fact that some people are impressed that I'm a lawyer is not really worth that much to me at this point.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher, it is difficult to hear that this is how you see us. I won’t make this reply about that though.

I would not encourage my kids to go into teaching. Not because I think it is settling or selling themselves short in any way because I don’t believe those things about teachers. I wouldn’t encourage it because the pay is not enough to support them or a family if they were to be without a partner.

If any of my kids told me they wanted to be a teacher, I would be proud of them for wanting to do meaningful work that leaves the world a better place. But I’d also encourage them to find a way to do that while earning a better income.

+ 1

My mom was a teacher and a pretty amazing one. She preferred to work in low income/high immigrant communities and dedicated her time and money to giving the best possible to her students. Parents raved about her and her students always had significant improvements in test scores. But when my niece said she wanted to be a teacher, my mom talked her out of it. She explained the job was high stress, undervalued and very underpaid. She wanted more financial stability for her granddaughter. Ultimately, my niece, who is great with kids, went into nursing and plans to work in the NICU or PICU with kids. It’s still high stress but she will be able to support herself well even without a partner.

Our high-achieving DC always wanted to be a teacher....and has been talked out of it by their esteemed teachers. And I mean that sincerely. We've been greatly blessed with an extraordinary number of extraordinary teachers. But every. single. one. has said -- don't do it.

So the pivot is to nursing, for now -- even though several close friends and family members who are nurses have likewise tried to dissuade our child. The plan is to double major in nursing and music therapy or (gasp) music education.

Strikingly, little of the advice has been because of money. It's all about the working conditions -- the hours, the stress, the heartache, the paperwork(!). Both sets acknowledge, however, there will always be a need for teachers and nurses.

It will not surprise us if, five years post BSN, our DC will be in a school. Somewhere. In the clinic, band room, or classroom. With us as their biggest cheerleaders!

OP, please try to find a way to embrace your child's path. There's nothing wrong with pointing out the potential pitfalls along the way but your issue seems more about whether the profession is good enough for your child. That's a different matter altogether.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. One of the problems is that DC goes to a pricey private school with amazing facilities. The teachers are great for the most part and engage with every student. DC is inspired by them and wants to be like them. The problem really is me. I'm the type-A striver parent who is embarrassed about telling other parents that DC wants to go to elite colleges but "end up" being a teacher. I'm trying hard to change my mindset, but it's not easy.

I commend the OP for having the self awareness to acknowledge that she is a status-obsessed type -A UMC “striver”. The reality is that while money is a consideration, what really irks the OP is the relatively low status afforded to teachers due to it being non-competitive to enter.

My unpopular opinion is that teachers have the most important and impactful role in our society, outside of lawmakers. I see what friends and family do as attorneys/big 4 partners and much of it is trivial paper pushing that makes a lot of money due to misaligned incentives. Most teachers will teach hundreds or thousands of kids during their careers and forever shape how they see the world. I wish that teachers were given the respect that their role deserves.

THIS
if only one in 500 could become a teacher, even if it paid 40k/year, DCUM would be dying for their kids to become teachers.

I don’t get this. My DD is a second grade teacher in Baltimore. I could not be more proud. If any parent is “embarrassed” their child is a teacher, you are the problem.

There is nothing wrong with being a teacher. It is a respectable (even noble) occupation. OP is the one who has problems.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. One of the problems is that DC goes to a pricey private school with amazing facilities. The teachers are great for the most part and engage with every student. DC is inspired by them and wants to be like them. The problem really is me. I'm the type-A striver parent who is embarrassed about telling other parents that DC wants to go to elite colleges but "end up" being a teacher. I'm trying hard to change my mindset, but it's not easy.

I commend the OP for having the self awareness to acknowledge that she is a status-obsessed type -A UMC “striver”. The reality is that while money is a consideration, what really irks the OP is the relatively low status afforded to teachers due to it being non-competitive to enter.

My unpopular opinion is that teachers have the most important and impactful role in our society, outside of lawmakers. I see what friends and family do as attorneys/big 4 partners and much of it is trivial paper pushing that makes a lot of money due to misaligned incentives. Most teachers will teach hundreds or thousands of kids during their careers and forever shape how they see the world. I wish that teachers were given the respect that their role deserves.

Your daughter is wise especially if she wants the have s family:

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/cant-outearn-stupidity-dave-ramsey-110000008.html#:~:text=Teachers%20rank%20third%2C%20behind%20engineers,lawyers%20ranked%20fourth%20and%20fifth.

The hustle track is overrated. Only the top 2% make partner and they kill themselves to do it.

Anonymous wrote:Intrigued that so many think that this is about a daughter. Is teaching women's work?

100%. Thought same thing. Funny how gender-based people are with professions.

Teaching is rewarding and pays nothing, which leads to immense stress and anxiety. Have child consider professor/college at least to double or triple salary and stress levels are same…or consider researching. Salary isn’t everything but helps mitigate stress for sure on many levels.

Anonymous wrote:DC is a straight A student and a strong athlete in high school. SAT is above 1500, and taking challenging AP classes. Yet DC says their goal is to become a teacher and lead a stable, anxiety-free life. I am so disappointed that they're not more ambitious, given their commitment to do well in school. I'm hoping that going to college will open their eyes to other options and get them excited about alternative professional pathways. Am I a bad parent for thinking this way?

Yes, your DC needs to make their own path in life. Teachers make $140,000 per year in DC for 9 months of work. The teachers I know are pretty laid back. I'd be proud of DC.

My sister is an award-winning high school Biology teacher at a public school out of state, she teaches everything from AP Biology to Gen Ed sciences. She went to private high school, then UNC. Could have gone to work in research with a biology degree. But she never looked back, got her masters in education.
It’s not easy. But she has a lot of fun, feels challenged and has a very rewarding, balanced life. A number of her students have gone on to careers in science at federal agencies (she’s taught more than 15 years now). And she has enough free time to dabble in hobbies like baking and gaming, besides raising a kid.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d honestly be thrilled if my child wanted to be a teacher. All that stress is offset by summer and vacations where they can pursue hobbies. We are saving to cover education and hopefully provide assistance with a down payment to help with the financial setback they will take from a teachers salary.

Teacher here. I get an 8 week summer and I spend half of it prepping for the next year. The 4 unpaid weeks I get IN NO WAY offset the 60-70 hour weeks I regularly put in during the school year.

The OP’s post is ridiculous. Frankly, I’m extremely impressed by successful teachers. If you can effectively manage 150 reluctant teenagers each day along with the deluge of paperwork that creates, you can do any other job out there.

ES teacher here. I couldn’t do what you do and it’s crazy we’re paid the same. I work 40 hour weeks and barely at all in the summer.

Anonymous wrote:I’d honestly be thrilled if my child wanted to be a teacher. All that stress is offset by summer and vacations where they can pursue hobbies. We are saving to cover education and hopefully provide assistance with a down payment to help with the financial setback they will take from a teachers salary.

Teacher here. I get an 8 week summer and I spend half of it prepping for the next year. The 4 unpaid weeks I get IN NO WAY offset the 60-70 hour weeks I regularly put in during the school year.

The OP’s post is ridiculous. Frankly, I’m extremely impressed by successful teachers. If you can effectively manage 150 reluctant teenagers each day along with the deluge of paperwork that creates, you can do any other job out there.

I’d honestly be thrilled if my child wanted to be a teacher. All that stress is offset by summer and vacations where they can pursue hobbies. We are saving to cover education and hopefully provide assistance with a down payment to help with the financial setback they will take from a teachers salary.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom was a teacher and would never have wanted her kids to go into the profession. Too underpaid, too micromanaged by idiots who know nothing about education, way underpaid, out of control parents.
OP maybe she could teach for a couple of years and then move to an education company, that’s where the real money is. Selling stuff and programs back to school districts.

I taught and would also discourage any bright young people from going into the profession. If you are not concerned about $ but also want to be a do-gooder I would look into non-profit work. That was going to be my move but I had kids and became a SAHM. I am in a state that treats it's teachers particularly poorly and I could count on one hand the number of decent teachers my age who are still in it after 10 years.

I can't speak for your state, but in mine (Virginia) teachers are paid pretty well and certainly more than most non-profit employees, plus there's a nice pension coming in states that stay solvent.

+1. I work at a relatively high SES elementary school in Loudoun and many teachers are pretty happy. Honestly the unhappy ones are mostly the under-30 unmarried ones.

Probably because they can't live on their meager salary. The older married ones live on their spouse's salary.