Anonymous
02/03/2024 19:15
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:OP, I've been in your shoes, and I understand why you're upset now and I probably would have felt something similar. But it's completely unreasonable - among other things, you have no idea what the woman was knitting, especially if you were so sobbing.
Also, the reality of a ob/gyn office is that you're going to be surrounded by women who are pregnant, others who are dealing with infertility or miscarriage, others who are facing serious medical issues. I'm now in the latter category and I don't begrudge the preggos or new moms when I wait to talk with my gynecologist about ovarian cancer.
It sounds like you needed privacy to deal with your emotions, which is also completely understandable, but that's not a waiting room is - either the practice should have found you somewhere secluded or you and your crying military officer husband should have left.
We were there for care. We should have left? Seriously?
Everyone in the room (except your husband) was there for care. You don’t get priority over the other patients so yes if you have a problem with someone doing a perfectly reasonable and permissible activity in a public waiting space then you need be the one to remove yourself…whether that entails moving to a different part of the waiting room, asking the front desk for a private waiting space or, waiting in the hallway, or rescheduling your appointment.
Do you realize that the presence of your husband at your appointments has potentially triggered another pregnant woman who is going through the process alone or with an uninvolved partner? Should she be entitled to ask him to leave since he’s not actually there for care but as a support person (and a reminder of what she lacks)?
Anonymous
02/03/2024 19:11
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Sorry for your loss, OP. It’s a devastating thing to experience. I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks. Not the same as you, but nonetheless I was pregnant and then I wasn’t. I took the embryo in to the OB so they could test it. Sitting in the waiting room with pregnant women made me sad and envious. They were pregnant and I wasn’t. It hurt, but I didn’t blame them. You don’t know the woman’s story (maybe she had prior miscarriages) and she didn’t know yours. Yes, it would have been nice for her to have some EQ. You were mad at the world and the injustice and understandably so. On a more pragmatic level, did the doctors have any indication of the cause? I had a friend who had 3 second trimester miscarriages and there was some issue with blood clotting that is somewhat common. There is medication to prevent it. I say this in case there’s any chance to prevent this in your future. I’m happy to say that my friend and I both have multiple children. Hugs and comfort to you.
It was very obviously a blood clotting disorder but for 3 years they couldn't find it and refused to treat it without a diagnosis so they continued to watch me lose more pregnancies. I sought out a super specialist that finally did more thorough testing and found it.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 19:01
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Sorry for your loss, OP. It’s a devastating thing to experience. I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks. Not the same as you, but nonetheless I was pregnant and then I wasn’t. I took the embryo in to the OB so they could test it. Sitting in the waiting room with pregnant women made me sad and envious. They were pregnant and I wasn’t. It hurt, but I didn’t blame them. You don’t know the woman’s story (maybe she had prior miscarriages) and she didn’t know yours. Yes, it would have been nice for her to have some EQ. You were mad at the world and the injustice and understandably so. On a more pragmatic level, did the doctors have any indication of the cause? I had a friend who had 3 second trimester miscarriages and there was some issue with blood clotting that is somewhat common. There is medication to prevent it. I say this in case there’s any chance to prevent this in your future. I’m happy to say that my friend and I both have multiple children. Hugs and comfort to you.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:56
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s fine to knit in a waiting room. Or read a baby book. Or scroll through pictures on your phone of your kids. Or watch your baby while you wait for an appointment. Not everything is about you.
I have a specialist appointment that requires me to walk through the "special" pregnancy area. The office keeps rescheduling my appointment and now I have no childcare. Am I am evil witch demon if I bring my three kids?
Are you sure you can even bring 3 kids? Some have a strict no kids policy and you will have to reschedule again.
Are they allowed to deny medical care because you cant line up child care when they keep rescheduling?
Uh, yes? You have 3 weeks notice. How much notice do you need?
She might have a regular babysitter for specific hours, the office says they can't see her during those hours
The possibilities are endless
Cool. Just saying some offices are sticklers. Show up with your brood of kids at your own risk.
Then they have to have some flexibility. By the third rescheduling on their end, they've lost the high ground.
I see you just want to argue without facts. But, no, the surgeon doesn't need you as much as you need him or her.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:56
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:OP, I've been in your shoes, and I understand why you're upset now and I probably would have felt something similar. But it's completely unreasonable - among other things, you have no idea what the woman was knitting, especially if you were so sobbing.
Also, the reality of a ob/gyn office is that you're going to be surrounded by women who are pregnant, others who are dealing with infertility or miscarriage, others who are facing serious medical issues. I'm now in the latter category and I don't begrudge the preggos or new moms when I wait to talk with my gynecologist about ovarian cancer.
It sounds like you needed privacy to deal with your emotions, which is also completely understandable, but that's not a waiting room is - either the practice should have found you somewhere secluded or you and your crying military officer husband should have left.
We were there for care. We should have left? Seriously?
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:54
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
OP, I've been in your shoes, and I understand why you're upset now and I probably would have felt something similar. But it's completely unreasonable - among other things, you have no idea what the woman was knitting, especially if you were so sobbing.
Also, the reality of a ob/gyn office is that you're going to be surrounded by women who are pregnant, others who are dealing with infertility or miscarriage, others who are facing serious medical issues. I'm now in the latter category and I don't begrudge the preggos or new moms when I wait to talk with my gynecologist about ovarian cancer.
It sounds like you needed privacy to deal with your emotions, which is also completely understandable, but that's not a waiting room is - either the practice should have found you somewhere secluded or you and your crying military officer husband should have left.
Also, the reality of a ob/gyn office is that you're going to be surrounded by women who are pregnant, others who are dealing with infertility or miscarriage, others who are facing serious medical issues. I'm now in the latter category and I don't begrudge the preggos or new moms when I wait to talk with my gynecologist about ovarian cancer.
It sounds like you needed privacy to deal with your emotions, which is also completely understandable, but that's not a waiting room is - either the practice should have found you somewhere secluded or you and your crying military officer husband should have left.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:48
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s fine to knit in a waiting room. Or read a baby book. Or scroll through pictures on your phone of your kids. Or watch your baby while you wait for an appointment. Not everything is about you.
I have a specialist appointment that requires me to walk through the "special" pregnancy area. The office keeps rescheduling my appointment and now I have no childcare. Am I am evil witch demon if I bring my three kids?
Are you sure you can even bring 3 kids? Some have a strict no kids policy and you will have to reschedule again.
Regular OB offices have no rules against kids. Maybe REs?
He's a specialist surgeon with an office in the giant floor with all the hospital OB offices. I had childcare lined up for the first appointment. If they want to reschedule with 3 weeks notice, then kids are coming.
Good luck with that. I know when I get a mammogram there are NO kids allowed. How can you focus on the doctor with 3 kids right next to you? They don't want kids around either so I'd check if I were you before wasting your time.
Do people getting mammograms typically have small children?
How can you tell somebody getting care for a C section complication to not bring kids? Crazy world we live in
Mammograms are recommended for age 40+ (tell me you don’t live in the dc area without telling me…)
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:46
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s fine to knit in a waiting room. Or read a baby book. Or scroll through pictures on your phone of your kids. Or watch your baby while you wait for an appointment. Not everything is about you.
I have a specialist appointment that requires me to walk through the "special" pregnancy area. The office keeps rescheduling my appointment and now I have no childcare. Am I am evil witch demon if I bring my three kids?
Are you sure you can even bring 3 kids? Some have a strict no kids policy and you will have to reschedule again.
Are they allowed to deny medical care because you cant line up child care when they keep rescheduling?
Uh, yes? You have 3 weeks notice. How much notice do you need?
She might have a regular babysitter for specific hours, the office says they can't see her during those hours
The possibilities are endless
Cool. Just saying some offices are sticklers. Show up with your brood of kids at your own risk.
Then they have to have some flexibility. By the third rescheduling on their end, they've lost the high ground.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:44
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:OP, look at it this way. Your miscarriage was due to an un-viable embryo. Nature did its job. There is something to be thankful for there.
I've seen kids with lots of problems born to families and none of it is a happy outcome. It is years and years of toil and heartbreak. And the marriages are inevitably strained if not totally breaks under the weight of the burden.
You will try again and have a happy healthy child who will bring your family years of joy. Think of it that way.
This is not true, I have recurrent pregnancy loss and all of them are chromosomally normal, late first trimester or second trimester. I've been losing babies for 3 years so there is no end in sight.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:42
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s fine to knit in a waiting room. Or read a baby book. Or scroll through pictures on your phone of your kids. Or watch your baby while you wait for an appointment. Not everything is about you.
I have a specialist appointment that requires me to walk through the "special" pregnancy area. The office keeps rescheduling my appointment and now I have no childcare. Am I am evil witch demon if I bring my three kids?
Are you sure you can even bring 3 kids? Some have a strict no kids policy and you will have to reschedule again.
Are they allowed to deny medical care because you cant line up child care when they keep rescheduling?
Uh, yes? You have 3 weeks notice. How much notice do you need?
She might have a regular babysitter for specific hours, the office says they can't see her during those hours
The possibilities are endless
Cool. Just saying some offices are sticklers. Show up with your brood of kids at your own risk.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:41
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:After my OB gave me an in office wanding, and said my fetus was dead, he sent me out to sit in the waiting room where I cried and cried. First pregnancy.
This is the OB practice's fault. I would not expect the other patients to do or say anything different because of me. But I would expect the OB to put me in a private space, unused office, even a coffee room so I don't have to sit in the waiting room with pregnant ladies.
They also did my subsequent abortion of my dead fetus in the MATERNITY WARD at the hospital. Let me know if you want to hear about what was going on around me....
This. 100% the fault of double and triple booking OB offices. They can't spare a room for 20 minutes? Fundamentally they just don't care, do they? They think they need to earn $500,000+ a year and they do that by seeing 40+ patients a day.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:39
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s fine to knit in a waiting room. Or read a baby book. Or scroll through pictures on your phone of your kids. Or watch your baby while you wait for an appointment. Not everything is about you.
I have a specialist appointment that requires me to walk through the "special" pregnancy area. The office keeps rescheduling my appointment and now I have no childcare. Am I am evil witch demon if I bring my three kids?
Are you sure you can even bring 3 kids? Some have a strict no kids policy and you will have to reschedule again.
Are they allowed to deny medical care because you cant line up child care when they keep rescheduling?
Uh, yes? You have 3 weeks notice. How much notice do you need?
Enough that my babysitter can request different shifts at her main job.
Its awkward scheduling her for one day then a week before having to change it for weeks later.
We already turned the first reschedule into a "date night"
I don't know why doctors think you're waiting around twiddling thumbs with unlimited availability to see them. To be honest, I am thinking it is a bonus to bring three kids to remind them their patients are people with lives.
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:34
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It’s fine to knit in a waiting room. Or read a baby book. Or scroll through pictures on your phone of your kids. Or watch your baby while you wait for an appointment. Not everything is about you.
I have a specialist appointment that requires me to walk through the "special" pregnancy area. The office keeps rescheduling my appointment and now I have no childcare. Am I am evil witch demon if I bring my three kids?
Are you sure you can even bring 3 kids? Some have a strict no kids policy and you will have to reschedule again.
Are they allowed to deny medical care because you cant line up child care when they keep rescheduling?
Uh, yes? You have 3 weeks notice. How much notice do you need?
She might have a regular babysitter for specific hours, the office says they can't see her during those hours
The possibilities are endless
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:34
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
After my OB gave me an in office wanding, and said my fetus was dead, he sent me out to sit in the waiting room where I cried and cried. First pregnancy.
This is the OB practice's fault. I would not expect the other patients to do or say anything different because of me. But I would expect the OB to put me in a private space, unused office, even a coffee room so I don't have to sit in the waiting room with pregnant ladies.
They also did my subsequent abortion of my dead fetus in the MATERNITY WARD at the hospital. Let me know if you want to hear about what was going on around me....
This is the OB practice's fault. I would not expect the other patients to do or say anything different because of me. But I would expect the OB to put me in a private space, unused office, even a coffee room so I don't have to sit in the waiting room with pregnant ladies.
They also did my subsequent abortion of my dead fetus in the MATERNITY WARD at the hospital. Let me know if you want to hear about what was going on around me....
Anonymous
02/03/2024 18:32
Subject: You walk into an OB office and sit next to a couple crying...
OP, look at it this way. Your miscarriage was due to an un-viable embryo. Nature did its job. There is something to be thankful for there.
I've seen kids with lots of problems born to families and none of it is a happy outcome. It is years and years of toil and heartbreak. And the marriages are inevitably strained if not totally breaks under the weight of the burden.
You will try again and have a happy healthy child who will bring your family years of joy. Think of it that way.
I've seen kids with lots of problems born to families and none of it is a happy outcome. It is years and years of toil and heartbreak. And the marriages are inevitably strained if not totally breaks under the weight of the burden.
You will try again and have a happy healthy child who will bring your family years of joy. Think of it that way.