Anonymous wrote:C'mon folks this is DCUM.
Home of women who expect their men to make at least 500K a year, have a net value of at least 10M, and be ultra and stupidly progressive.
And who endlessly complain that there are no available men, just incels.
Of course release this poor, poor "low earning" man so that a nice woman may hope to find him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Insufficient information— how old is *he* and GS14 *what*.

If he’s a 30 y/o GS14 it’s very different than a 40 y/o GS14. Bear in mind the GS14-15 jump is a trap— going into the 15 without your 5-7 year plan for leaving government in place means accepting wage stagnation.

If you don’t know this much about government salaries by 32, living in the DC area, it may be better for you to just continue to date industry.

OP here. He’s 36, and has no interest in ever moving to private practice. It just strikes me as a red flag - not wanting to live up to his full potential.

FWIW I’m in big law and have dated in that realm, or higher income men.

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who views a career in high-level government lawyering as “not living up to potential” has priorities that will not make this match work. Go after your own values; you treasure big money earners.

Anonymous wrote:They have terms for women like you - unmarried and over the age of 28 - in Asia:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheng_nu

Anonymous wrote:They have terms for women like you - unmarried and over the age of 28 - in Asia:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheng_nu

Anonymous wrote:I turned 32 this year and made a resolution to find someone to settle down with. Last month I hit it off with someone who seemed great. The problem is he’s civil service, GS-14.

Everyone I’ve dated in the past has been much higher income (private industry). I’m worried long term I’m going to be resentful if he can’t contribute to our lifestyle.

Should I cut him loose?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my previous career I went through two corporate takeovers and two layoffs and after the second I landed in a fed job. I had a path to GS14 and I knew the salary was sufficient at that grade so I made the tradeoff between pay and stability. I got married and one day my wife of 3 years broke down and declared I wasn't making enough money and that I wasn't giving her the life she wanted. She became constantly angry, uncooperative, and eventually moved out and we divorced.

Frankly, it was devastating to my sense of self-worth.

As a topped-out GS14 I'm bumping up on the fed pay cap and my peers from my pervious career are earning 100K more per year than I am. It is true there is a GIANT pay gap between feds and industry. Comparison is the thief of happiness so I try not to look (yeah, willful blindness). One woman I've dated generally referenced by GS salary before breaking things off and another looked it up and said "yeah, I don't know if the website is accurate but I don't see a future for us."

My conclusion is that for many women it isn't about love and family but rather about competition with other women to snag a "big fish" so they have bragging rights among other women. It's essentially a group of "besties" quietly judging each other over what they "have" and husbands are merely another accessory.

So, yeah, I don't think OP is a troll.

So, isn’t it a blessing for you, then, that your gov job effectively screens out the most shallow and superficial women?

What’s shallow or superficial about considering financial stability?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Insufficient information— how old is *he* and GS14 *what*.

If he’s a 30 y/o GS14 it’s very different than a 40 y/o GS14. Bear in mind the GS14-15 jump is a trap— going into the 15 without your 5-7 year plan for leaving government in place means accepting wage stagnation.

If you don’t know this much about government salaries by 32, living in the DC area, it may be better for you to just continue to date industry.

OP here. He’s 36, and has no interest in ever moving to private practice. It just strikes me as a red flag - not wanting to live up to his full potential.

FWIW I’m in big law and have dated in that realm, or higher income men.

EW. Girl boss alert. Everyone must give in to the corporate warlords and serve them with fealty. Scramble to the top and die. Please let him go OP. There are plenty of women who would appreciate him and you are just going to put him down.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my previous career I went through two corporate takeovers and two layoffs and after the second I landed in a fed job. I had a path to GS14 and I knew the salary was sufficient at that grade so I made the tradeoff between pay and stability. I got married and one day my wife of 3 years broke down and declared I wasn't making enough money and that I wasn't giving her the life she wanted. She became constantly angry, uncooperative, and eventually moved out and we divorced.

Frankly, it was devastating to my sense of self-worth.

As a topped-out GS14 I'm bumping up on the fed pay cap and my peers from my pervious career are earning 100K more per year than I am. It is true there is a GIANT pay gap between feds and industry. Comparison is the thief of happiness so I try not to look (yeah, willful blindness). One woman I've dated generally referenced by GS salary before breaking things off and another looked it up and said "yeah, I don't know if the website is accurate but I don't see a future for us."

My conclusion is that for many women it isn't about love and family but rather about competition with other women to snag a "big fish" so they have bragging rights among other women. It's essentially a group of "besties" quietly judging each other over what they "have" and husbands are merely another accessory.

So, yeah, I don't think OP is a troll.

So, isn’t it a blessing for you, then, that your gov job effectively screens out the most shallow and superficial women?

What’s shallow or superficial about considering financial stability?