Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this view that working at home is not working. People in the office are constantly going out to get premium coffee, sometimes multiple times a day. No one in office is doing just a 30 minute lunch if they step foot out of their building. That's in addition to all the impromptu meetings in conference rooms that end up being 1 hour of chatting. All that time wasting is in public view and yet people still pretend being in office is productive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I worked for the government for 20 years. It’s interesting that the instinct of most posters on here is to defend WFH, the time the dad has with his kids, federal employee time-off benefits, etc. In other words, when confronted with the possibility of abuse, federal workers quickly rally around the flag. My experience with such knee-jerk responses is that many know there is abuse, but they don’t want light shed on it. Why? Because they do it too. They don’t want the gravy train to stop. Another typical response to such allegations is that federal employees need a break because they are underpaid. Again, this is all about distraction. For the work performed, many, many Federal employees are overpaid, especially when lifetime benefits are considered. This is even more egregious at the financial regulators. I know. Been there, done that. OP, what you describe is abuse and fraud. It has nothing to do with flexible work arrangements. Unfortunately, I could name you a dozen people from my former agency division that do as your ex does. Yes, they abuse the system. Any “jealousy” on your part is really outrage that this can be happening, and yes, a bit of “if this is how it works, why not me.” But, this isn’t how it should work. You are right to question it.

Yup, everyone’s colluding. That must be it.

It’s interesting to me that you think people pushing back on what’s an obvious troll post must have a nefarious reason to do so. What other reason could they possibly have for defending themselves when they’re part of a workforce that is the constant target of disingenuous attacks from certain political groups whose primary motive is to lower their own tax bill at everyone’s expense?

Reread my post. I don’t need to wonder if this happens, I know that it does. I’ve witnessed it. I knew a young woman who had a child out of wedlock. Even after she returned to work, no one knew where she was. She was never available for assignments. During COVID, she went to live with her mother. Anytime someone raised an issue, her Director covered for her. She became an untouchable. She makes $200k. There are many stories like this. I’m not a troll. I’m channeling reality.

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand this view that working at home is not working. People in the office are constantly going out to get premium coffee, sometimes multiple times a day. No one in office is doing just a 30 minute lunch if they step foot out of their building. That's in addition to all the impromptu meetings in conference rooms that end up being 1 hour of chatting. All that time wasting is in public view and yet people still pretend being in office is productive.

Anonymous wrote:
OP here. As a federal contractor, I see both sides. I interact closely with federal employees who struggle with work life balance because of the work expectations. I'm baffled that in a separate federal agency its so vastly different where he can be away so often under so many circumstances.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the pick ups and practices he might be flexing. He can leave for a few hours and either start early or end later to cover the time away. He should have enough leave to cover a week for winter break, spring break, and summer break. That leaves a week for a vacation and 5 days to cover field trips, etc.


He may get his bonus as leave hours instead of money. I can't tell you if he is slacking or not, but he could be working 40 hours and performing as expected and still be able to do the things he does with his child. One of the advantages of being a Fed is the work life balance.

On our dime.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe he was a jerk to you, op, but he’s clearly not a jerk as a dad. Just let go of your resentment towards him or it will really drive a wedge between you and your child. I frankly wouldn’t care if my ex was a stripper if he made an effort to pick up our kid everyday and go to soccer games, etc. You need to get a grip on reality here. Your resentment means he’s living rent free in your head and you are only one making yourself (and hopefully not your kid) suffer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm guessing no one is going to talk about this on here, but my kid's dad is a very well-paid fed who is constantly on personal vacation. I mean, I've lost track of how many times per year he has been off traveling, plus breaks with the kids winter break, spring break, summer vacations, being chaperone for their field trips, able to pick them up early after school, attend their sports practices at times most people are working. This is has been ongoing for years. How much leave to federal employees get or is he milking the system? It would be impossible that this is carryover year after year and he is not the type to be up on his computer late into the night. I am working in the wrong sector.

It sounds like you need a therapist, rather than complain about your ex using his benefits. It's absolutely unhealthy that you're angry about him taking time off with his kids, picking them up from school, attending sports practice, and joining field trips. Anyone else would be calling him a damn good dad.