Anonymous wrote:OP I get it. You wanted to get hot chocolate for the kids. You weren't expecting a bunch of spoiled kids who get taken to Starbucks regularly enough that they have their own preferred custom drink. Hot chocolate would be a treat in my house, and my kids would happily accept it without thinking they are entitled to whatever they want from the Starbucks menu.

Who are all these kids drinking Starbucks regularly?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I get it. You wanted to get hot chocolate for the kids. You weren't expecting a bunch of spoiled kids who get taken to Starbucks regularly enough that they have their own preferred custom drink. Hot chocolate would be a treat in my house, and my kids would happily accept it without thinking they are entitled to whatever they want from the Starbucks menu.

Who are all these kids drinking Starbucks regularly?

Why? Why was she only wanting to buy hot chocolate rather than hoping to treat the girls to a drink of their choice?

Anonymous wrote:OP I get it. You wanted to get hot chocolate for the kids. You weren't expecting a bunch of spoiled kids who get taken to Starbucks regularly enough that they have their own preferred custom drink. Hot chocolate would be a treat in my house, and my kids would happily accept it without thinking they are entitled to whatever they want from the Starbucks menu.

Who are all these kids drinking Starbucks regularly?

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Anonymous wrote:Is this rude? 2 kids have done this recently. Took DD ( 10) and a friend to an activity. Offered to get DD and friend a hot chocolate from Starbucks that I would pre order on the app then just walk over and pick up. First friend said “ if you’re getting it from Starbucks can I have a tai chai latte instead” I said no the offer was for hot chocolate. 2nd kid on different occasion but same activity said “ can I get s baked good as well, I’d really like a croissant” I said sure, then she requested it be double toasted. Both kids were polite for the most part but if you offered my kid a drink of snack she would never request something completely different or an extra item. I feel like it’s rude, but am I wrong? Given that 2 kids did it maybe it’s normal.

I think you were rude to not allow the kid to select a different drink. I find it perplexing that you said no to that but yes to an additional product.

I would say the kid asking for a croissant is kinda "rude" but also nbd. I would have said: we're just doing drinks today, but we'll do that another day.

Can you imagine being with adults and someone saying, I'm treating you guys to brownies! And responding, Oh I really don't like brownies, can I get a vanilla cupcake instead? and them saying, "No. The offer is for brownies."

I don't think you're in a position to assess these kids' manners.

NP. I think the adult asking for a vanilla cupcake instead is being kind of rude. If you don’t like brownies, just say “no, thank you!” Then the treating adult might say, “oh, maybe there’s something else you’d prefer?” But to outright ask for it is annoying and presumptuous.

Agree with the poster above yours. The adult in this scenario is being a terrible gift giver or host. Who interacts this way, treating another person to “brownies”? A person would say, “I’d love to treat you to dinner for your birthday! Any place you’d like to go?” Not “I’d like to treat you to a brownie for your birthday.” Can you imagine your mother in law ordering dinner off an app and offering you a hamburger, but considering you “rude” if you ask to order a salad instead? I think some people on this thread are controlling in ways they don’t realize.

What an idiotic analogy. I don't care for cake, but people have made or purchased cakes for me for my birthday and brought them to work, and I graciously eat a slice. I don't proclaim "I don't eat cake! You are a horrible gift giver!" If someone gives you a gift or treat, you say thank you, or decline if it's food, you don't ask for an alternative gift or treat. That's rude.

Anonymous wrote:OP I get it. You wanted to get hot chocolate for the kids. You weren't expecting a bunch of spoiled kids who get taken to Starbucks regularly enough that they have their own preferred custom drink. Hot chocolate would be a treat in my house, and my kids would happily accept it without thinking they are entitled to whatever they want from the Starbucks menu.

Who are all these kids drinking Starbucks regularly?

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Is this rude? 2 kids have done this recently. Took DD ( 10) and a friend to an activity. Offered to get DD and friend a hot chocolate from Starbucks that I would pre order on the app then just walk over and pick up. First friend said “ if you’re getting it from Starbucks can I have a tai chai latte instead” I said no the offer was for hot chocolate. 2nd kid on different occasion but same activity said “ can I get s baked good as well, I’d really like a croissant” I said sure, then she requested it be double toasted. Both kids were polite for the most part but if you offered my kid a drink of snack she would never request something completely different or an extra item. I feel like it’s rude, but am I wrong? Given that 2 kids did it maybe it’s normal.

I think you were rude to not allow the kid to select a different drink. I find it perplexing that you said no to that but yes to an additional product.

I would say the kid asking for a croissant is kinda "rude" but also nbd. I would have said: we're just doing drinks today, but we'll do that another day.

Can you imagine being with adults and someone saying, I'm treating you guys to brownies! And responding, Oh I really don't like brownies, can I get a vanilla cupcake instead? and them saying, "No. The offer is for brownies."

I don't think you're in a position to assess these kids' manners.

NP. I think the adult asking for a vanilla cupcake instead is being kind of rude. If you don’t like brownies, just say “no, thank you!” Then the treating adult might say, “oh, maybe there’s something else you’d prefer?” But to outright ask for it is annoying and presumptuous.

Agree with the poster above yours. The adult in this scenario is being a terrible gift giver or host. Who interacts this way, treating another person to “brownies”? A person would say, “I’d love to treat you to dinner for your birthday! Any place you’d like to go?” Not “I’d like to treat you to a brownie for your birthday.” Can you imagine your mother in law ordering dinner off an app and offering you a hamburger, but considering you “rude” if you ask to order a salad instead? I think some people on this thread are controlling in ways they don’t realize.

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Anonymous wrote:Who takes children to Starbucks?

This! Actually, I know many who do and they get 5 yo coffee drinks! I think Starbucks is a waste of money and their drinks and "food" tastes chemically. No way my kids gets anything from there and I certainly wouldn't buy it for someone else's child.

I love Judge Judy and I am certain she'd agree with me.

She’d question the relevance of that nonsense statement in a discussion of manners

She always goes straight to the heart of the matter: children shouldn't be consuming starbucks drinks.

I don't know much about parenting, but I certainly know Judge Judy. She'd stop the irrelevant Starbucks tangent in its tracks. It has nothing to do with the case.

You: And what kind of parent takes a kids to Starbucks anyways? Their food tastes chemically.

Judge Judy:

Judge Judy and me: "You're an idiot".

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Anonymous wrote:OP - did you have a coupon for a hot chocolate or something? Why couldn’t the guest get a tea instead? I think you’re rude for saying she can only have a hot chocolate.

no coupon. I have hot chocolate saved as a favorite on my app. To try and offer 6 10/11 year old girls varying beverages would have taken forever, they’re not drinks I drink so I know nothing and when I get choices and how many pumps of X I want, do I want extra this or that, if gets overwhelming. Next time I take my kid and a friend or friends to this activity we’ll skip drinks after altogether.

I mean, I don’t think saying no is really that much of a problem, it’s that you found them rude for asking. My kid has food intolerances and often has to ask for adjustments (e.g. ask for their pasta with out z sauce) or decline part of a meal. She would ask for something else but accept no if you said no, as she has been taught to do.

the hard part about saying no is that I don’t want my kid being talked about as the kid with the mean mom. I’m probably overthinking it. But either way, I’ve decided I’m just not offering again.

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Anonymous wrote:Who takes children to Starbucks?

This! Actually, I know many who do and they get 5 yo coffee drinks! I think Starbucks is a waste of money and their drinks and "food" tastes chemically. No way my kids gets anything from there and I certainly wouldn't buy it for someone else's child.

I love Judge Judy and I am certain she'd agree with me.

She’d question the relevance of that nonsense statement in a discussion of manners

She always goes straight to the heart of the matter: children shouldn't be consuming starbucks drinks.

I don't know much about parenting, but I certainly know Judge Judy. She'd stop the irrelevant Starbucks tangent in its tracks. It has nothing to do with the case.

You: And what kind of parent takes a kids to Starbucks anyways? Their food tastes chemically.

Judge Judy:

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Anonymous wrote:OP - did you have a coupon for a hot chocolate or something? Why couldn’t the guest get a tea instead? I think you’re rude for saying she can only have a hot chocolate.

no coupon. I have hot chocolate saved as a favorite on my app. To try and offer 6 10/11 year old girls varying beverages would have taken forever, they’re not drinks I drink so I know nothing and when I get choices and how many pumps of X I want, do I want extra this or that, if gets overwhelming. Next time I take my kid and a friend or friends to this activity we’ll skip drinks after altogether.

I mean, I don’t think saying no is really that much of a problem, it’s that you found them rude for asking. My kid has food intolerances and often has to ask for adjustments (e.g. ask for their pasta with out z sauce) or decline part of a meal. She would ask for something else but accept no if you said no, as she has been taught to do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - did you have a coupon for a hot chocolate or something? Why couldn’t the guest get a tea instead? I think you’re rude for saying she can only have a hot chocolate.

no coupon. I have hot chocolate saved as a favorite on my app. To try and offer 6 10/11 year old girls varying beverages would have taken forever, they’re not drinks I drink so I know nothing and when I get choices and how many pumps of X I want, do I want extra this or that, if gets overwhelming. Next time I take my kid and a friend or friends to this activity we’ll skip drinks after altogether.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - did you have a coupon for a hot chocolate or something? Why couldn’t the guest get a tea instead? I think you’re rude for saying she can only have a hot chocolate.

no coupon. I have hot chocolate saved as a favorite on my app. To try and offer 6 10/11 year old girls varying beverages would have taken forever, they’re not drinks I drink so I know nothing and when I get choices and how many pumps of X I want, do I want extra this or that, if gets overwhelming. Next time I take my kid and a friend or friends to this activity we’ll skip drinks after altogether.