Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My brother just told me he is bringing his gf for the weekend to spend Christmas with us. He also mentioned she is now vegan and if I would make some sides for her. My family and I are very health conscience and exercise daily but on holidays we will indulge and are meat eaters. Christmas eve dinner we are having steak and xmas dinner we are having ham & turkey. This whole thing has rubbed me the wrong way. I am so busy I don't have time to educate myself on vegan dishes. Even writing this post I am doing it waiting for my curbside pick up. He sent me a "small" list of items she cannot have. No meat, dairy, eggs, honey, seafood blaw blaw blaw. I responded I did not have time to cater to her food preferences and if I make them there is a 100% chance there will be cross contamination with the "bad" food. I advised him to go to moms and use her kitchen and to get to cooking and he could bring the side dishes they prepared themselves. He went on a rant about how I don't like her (I don't - whole other story) and that if it were someone else I would take the time to make the side dishes. I assured him I would not. I also reminded him if his gf caused any drama it would not be well received and would have to leave if she did. I told him I loved him and hung up. I feel a tiny twinge that I might have been a jerk. I also feel like they are being very very inconsiderate. Any advice? Am I the worst host by telling them to cook their own food?

When someone uses the phrase “foods she cannot have,” they’d better mean for medical reasons. That’s not the case here. Yes, tell her she’s on her own. Or make it your brothers problem. He’ll soon see what a PITA people like this are.

Anonymous wrote:Just always have a salad. Done. Protein is on her.

Anonymous wrote:"vegan butter" is margarine. It's what we had all the time in the 80s when people thought it was healthier (and because it was cheaper). Big ol tub of country crock.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d adjust anything easy to tweak (no butter in vegetables, set aside some plain mashed potatoes before adding butter/cream to the rest), tell them the menu, and let them know they can bring other stuff.

If they pouted over that, I’d make the menu as originally planned and set a box of cereal and a carton of almond milk at the end of the buffet.

Do vegans actually eat mashed potatoes? They must taste horrible without milk and butter.

You can use coconut milk or lemon juice , vegan butter… All kinds of things - I add plain unsweetened coconut yogurt to mine. Minus the lemon version they come out creamy and delicious. When you let go of the milk products you can get creative and come up with beautiful textures and Adams. When you get the sour cream me buttery flavor? No but you can make something really delicious.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d adjust anything easy to tweak (no butter in vegetables, set aside some plain mashed potatoes before adding butter/cream to the rest), tell them the menu, and let them know they can bring other stuff.

If they pouted over that, I’d make the menu as originally planned and set a box of cereal and a carton of almond milk at the end of the buffet.

Do vegans actually eat mashed potatoes? They must taste horrible without milk and butter.

You can use coconut milk or lemon juice , vegan butter… All kinds of things - I add plain unsweetened coconut yogurt to mine. Minus the lemon version they come out creamy and delicious. When you let go of the milk products you can get creative and come up with beautiful textures and Adams. When you get the sour cream me buttery flavor? No but you can make something really delicious.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d adjust anything easy to tweak (no butter in vegetables, set aside some plain mashed potatoes before adding butter/cream to the rest), tell them the menu, and let them know they can bring other stuff.

If they pouted over that, I’d make the menu as originally planned and set a box of cereal and a carton of almond milk at the end of the buffet.

Do vegans actually eat mashed potatoes? They must taste horrible without milk and butter.

Anonymous wrote:I’d adjust anything easy to tweak (no butter in vegetables, set aside some plain mashed potatoes before adding butter/cream to the rest), tell them the menu, and let them know they can bring other stuff.

If they pouted over that, I’d make the menu as originally planned and set a box of cereal and a carton of almond milk at the end of the buffet.

Anonymous wrote:“We’ll have some vegetable sides, but I’ve already done all my shopping, so feel free to get yourselves groceries and anything you want to have on hand. If you had given me advance notice, I would have prepared, but at this stage I will not be running out to the store again. If that changes your desire to come over, I understand.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I feel like your disdain for your brother's GF is probably coloring your reaction a bit. The best thing to do in cases like this is to say as little as possible. "Glad Larla can join us, I just finished grocery shopping, but definitely bring whatever you want!" done.

Exactly. +1

+2