Anonymous wrote:OP props for trying but you're not going to change the behavior of stubborn a'holes on DCUM who are rude to servers or who don't tip. There are many previous threads if you do a search. I think actually you'll find that you can make a pretty decent living as a server or bartender if you are good at it and work your way up to a fine dining place. You will also put up with minimal bullsh*t at those places because most intelligent, accomplished people don't want to appear to be morons when they are out in public. They generally appreciate good food and good service and don't whine about paying for it.

This thread went from why are people rude to servers to why don't some people tip appropriately. Neither topic will ever be resolved. Both are realities in the world of serving. As a server you have to accept this and don't let it affect how you do your job if you want to be successful.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
So it's all about the tip, is it?
Pray, what is a low tip to you?

I'd rather pay more taxes and vote for politicians who want to raise the minimum wage than tip more than 20% for exceptional service (15 for standard, and lower or nothing for bad service).

You are part of the problem, OP - a generation of idiots who seek waiter jobs for the tips. No, you should be fighting for a decent wage instead. You are holding yourself back, and holding everyone back.

Oh, bless your heart. Not OP, but do you really think servers aren't also fighting for a decent wage? Do you... do you think that they want to be paid $2.13 an hour and be at the whim of leering weirdos who expect you to laugh at their jokes and parents who let their kids literally and deliberately crush wet Cheerios into the fabric of the booth benches?

Silly servers, holding the whole of society back like they do. For, you know... reasons. Or something.

Most parents don't allow their kids to behave that way. We did not.

They are choosing to work a job that "pays" $2.13. Plenty of other jobs available that pay much more.

If everyone "chooses" to work another job, then who will wait on you and your brats? Who will there be for you to lord it over?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:30’s families, 20s and 30’s couples tip the best. Most older women do not tip well. Most but not all older men do. The after church crowd is both notoriously needy, rude, and poor at tipping and that generalization is 100% true.

That may be because all women over forty are typically not provided as good customer service. So they’re less inclined to tip well when they haven’t been treated as well. Waiters etc. provide better customer service to men. This is true even in circumstances where they aren’t tipped, like flight attendants.

How do they still manage to tip you badly even after they've been nice to you and you have been nice to you(vice versa)?

NP with serving experience.

Because they:

1) Don't understand how to tip. Ignorance, willful or otherwise. English visitors were lovely and often fit into this category. Teenagers, too.

2) Believe tipping is truly optional, instead of technically optional.

3) Have a twisted religious justification for tipping poorly or not at all.

4) Are so rich they don't even think about people needing this money to literally pay their bills. Kind of an inverted Lucille Bluth. "It's $10, Michael. What could that buy, a banana? Big deal." If they even gave it that much consideration. To them, tipping 10% instead of 20% on a $200 bill and reducing the tip by $20 was the same as shorting someone a penny. Insignificant.

5) People who think servers are lovely and all, but only "take down your order" and are no more deserving of a tip than a cashier. See this thread.

6) Relatedly, and in conjunction with one or more of the above, have no idea that otherwise, most servers make $2.13 an hour.

All of the above people can be perfectly pleasant customers and would happily tell you they got great service. Sometimes they'll even compliment you to your manager, as if that pays your bills.

A couple of uncommon but not rare ones were:

1) People who came in and sometimes even told you from the start that they had (or only budgeted for) just enough money for their meal, and not enough for a tip. They never ordered less food, or water instead of soda or w/e, in order to afford the tip. They were usually very nice, but !!!

2) Churchgoing people who would say they only "gave God" 10% (tithe) so they just couldn't in good conscience give you more than that. Never mind the only thing tip and tithe have to do with each other is a percentage sign. The old waiter rejoinder was, "Great! Just give me 10% of your salary, then!"

If you think that the only people who tip poorly got bad service-- or even that the only people who tip poorly at least BELIEVE they got bad service-- I have news for you.

If you aren't making the income you demand, then find a differs t job.

Tip is a tip. Its not a payment or a salary/income. The real issue is these businesses should be paying a salary and they aren't.

A tip is generally 15%. Bad service 10%. But, if you do very little as a server, don't expect much. You don't deserve $10 for 5 minutes of work.

5 minutes? 5 minutes?? I've been tipped $2 serving a table that stayed 2 hours, fetching their meals and waters! While I could have been getting more worthwhile customers. That's almost two hours spent watching the table that overstayed to make sure they need anything. You sound like you don't deserve more than 5 minutes of our time.

Them taking up a table for two hours doesn't mean you worked with them two hours. A meal is one dish, maybe two. You bring it out one time. You bring water once, and refill 1-2 times. Really, not that much work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:30’s families, 20s and 30’s couples tip the best. Most older women do not tip well. Most but not all older men do. The after church crowd is both notoriously needy, rude, and poor at tipping and that generalization is 100% true.

That may be because all women over forty are typically not provided as good customer service. So they’re less inclined to tip well when they haven’t been treated as well. Waiters etc. provide better customer service to men. This is true even in circumstances where they aren’t tipped, like flight attendants.

How do they still manage to tip you badly even after they've been nice to you and you have been nice to you(vice versa)?

NP with serving experience.

Because they:

1) Don't understand how to tip. Ignorance, willful or otherwise. English visitors were lovely and often fit into this category. Teenagers, too.

2) Believe tipping is truly optional, instead of technically optional.

3) Have a twisted religious justification for tipping poorly or not at all.

4) Are so rich they don't even think about people needing this money to literally pay their bills. Kind of an inverted Lucille Bluth. "It's $10, Michael. What could that buy, a banana? Big deal." If they even gave it that much consideration. To them, tipping 10% instead of 20% on a $200 bill and reducing the tip by $20 was the same as shorting someone a penny. Insignificant.

5) People who think servers are lovely and all, but only "take down your order" and are no more deserving of a tip than a cashier. See this thread.

6) Relatedly, and in conjunction with one or more of the above, have no idea that otherwise, most servers make $2.13 an hour.

All of the above people can be perfectly pleasant customers and would happily tell you they got great service. Sometimes they'll even compliment you to your manager, as if that pays your bills.

A couple of uncommon but not rare ones were:

1) People who came in and sometimes even told you from the start that they had (or only budgeted for) just enough money for their meal, and not enough for a tip. They never ordered less food, or water instead of soda or w/e, in order to afford the tip. They were usually very nice, but !!!

2) Churchgoing people who would say they only "gave God" 10% (tithe) so they just couldn't in good conscience give you more than that. Never mind the only thing tip and tithe have to do with each other is a percentage sign. The old waiter rejoinder was, "Great! Just give me 10% of your salary, then!"

If you think that the only people who tip poorly got bad service-- or even that the only people who tip poorly at least BELIEVE they got bad service-- I have news for you.

If you aren't making the income you demand, then find a differs t job.

Tip is a tip. Its not a payment or a salary/income. The real issue is these businesses should be paying a salary and they aren't.

A tip is generally 15%. Bad service 10%. But, if you do very little as a server, don't expect much. You don't deserve $10 for 5 minutes of work.

5 minutes? 5 minutes?? I've been tipped $2 serving a table that stayed 2 hours, fetching their meals and waters! While I could have been getting more worthwhile customers. That's almost two hours spent watching the table that overstayed to make sure they need anything. You sound like you don't deserve more than 5 minutes of our time.

Them taking up a table for two hours doesn't mean you worked with them two hours. A meal is one dish, maybe two. You bring it out one time. You bring water once, and refill 1-2 times. Really, not that much work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I tip 20% for adequate service, 25% for very good service, and 15% for poor service. I'd prefer to do away with the tipping system altogether, raise menu prices 20%, and pay the servers a fair wage.

+1
I'm always trying to pay the bill when out with my parents because they pay 15% tip and I find that horrifying. I will be on high alert to steal the check and pay and tip decently if its a place I frequent.

15% is standard.

Sure, in 1996.

Anonymous wrote:I stopped going to restaurants. They are dirty, food is tasteless

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:30’s families, 20s and 30’s couples tip the best. Most older women do not tip well. Most but not all older men do. The after church crowd is both notoriously needy, rude, and poor at tipping and that generalization is 100% true.

That may be because all women over forty are typically not provided as good customer service. So they’re less inclined to tip well when they haven’t been treated as well. Waiters etc. provide better customer service to men. This is true even in circumstances where they aren’t tipped, like flight attendants.

How do they still manage to tip you badly even after they've been nice to you and you have been nice to you(vice versa)?

NP with serving experience.

Because they:

1) Don't understand how to tip. Ignorance, willful or otherwise. English visitors were lovely and often fit into this category. Teenagers, too.

2) Believe tipping is truly optional, instead of technically optional.

3) Have a twisted religious justification for tipping poorly or not at all.

4) Are so rich they don't even think about people needing this money to literally pay their bills. Kind of an inverted Lucille Bluth. "It's $10, Michael. What could that buy, a banana? Big deal." If they even gave it that much consideration. To them, tipping 10% instead of 20% on a $200 bill and reducing the tip by $20 was the same as shorting someone a penny. Insignificant.

5) People who think servers are lovely and all, but only "take down your order" and are no more deserving of a tip than a cashier. See this thread.

6) Relatedly, and in conjunction with one or more of the above, have no idea that otherwise, most servers make $2.13 an hour.

All of the above people can be perfectly pleasant customers and would happily tell you they got great service. Sometimes they'll even compliment you to your manager, as if that pays your bills.

A couple of uncommon but not rare ones were:

1) People who came in and sometimes even told you from the start that they had (or only budgeted for) just enough money for their meal, and not enough for a tip. They never ordered less food, or water instead of soda or w/e, in order to afford the tip. They were usually very nice, but !!!

2) Churchgoing people who would say they only "gave God" 10% (tithe) so they just couldn't in good conscience give you more than that. Never mind the only thing tip and tithe have to do with each other is a percentage sign. The old waiter rejoinder was, "Great! Just give me 10% of your salary, then!"

If you think that the only people who tip poorly got bad service-- or even that the only people who tip poorly at least BELIEVE they got bad service-- I have news for you.

If you aren't making the income you demand, then find a differs t job.

Tip is a tip. Its not a payment or a salary/income. The real issue is these businesses should be paying a salary and they aren't.

A tip is generally 15%. Bad service 10%. But, if you do very little as a server, don't expect much. You don't deserve $10 for 5 minutes of work.

5 minutes? 5 minutes?? I've been tipped $2 serving a table that stayed 2 hours, fetching their meals and waters! While I could have been getting more worthwhile customers. That's almost two hours spent watching the table that overstayed to make sure they need anything. You sound like you don't deserve more than 5 minutes of our time.

Them taking up a table for two hours doesn't mean you worked with them two hours. A meal is one dish, maybe two. You bring it out one time. You bring water once, and refill 1-2 times. Really, not that much work.

No one who has ever waited tables would say this. You wouldn't last one shift, PP.

Actually I waited tables from age 15-20 at various types of restaurants from greasy spoon diners to upscale. No, it isn’t that much work, for each individual table if they aren’t a large party or having excessive needs. Collectively, it is busy with several tables in play. But let’s not make it is out to be something it isn’t

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:30’s families, 20s and 30’s couples tip the best. Most older women do not tip well. Most but not all older men do. The after church crowd is both notoriously needy, rude, and poor at tipping and that generalization is 100% true.

That may be because all women over forty are typically not provided as good customer service. So they’re less inclined to tip well when they haven’t been treated as well. Waiters etc. provide better customer service to men. This is true even in circumstances where they aren’t tipped, like flight attendants.

How do they still manage to tip you badly even after they've been nice to you and you have been nice to you(vice versa)?

NP with serving experience.

Because they:

1) Don't understand how to tip. Ignorance, willful or otherwise. English visitors were lovely and often fit into this category. Teenagers, too.

2) Believe tipping is truly optional, instead of technically optional.

3) Have a twisted religious justification for tipping poorly or not at all.

4) Are so rich they don't even think about people needing this money to literally pay their bills. Kind of an inverted Lucille Bluth. "It's $10, Michael. What could that buy, a banana? Big deal." If they even gave it that much consideration. To them, tipping 10% instead of 20% on a $200 bill and reducing the tip by $20 was the same as shorting someone a penny. Insignificant.

5) People who think servers are lovely and all, but only "take down your order" and are no more deserving of a tip than a cashier. See this thread.

6) Relatedly, and in conjunction with one or more of the above, have no idea that otherwise, most servers make $2.13 an hour.

All of the above people can be perfectly pleasant customers and would happily tell you they got great service. Sometimes they'll even compliment you to your manager, as if that pays your bills.

A couple of uncommon but not rare ones were:

1) People who came in and sometimes even told you from the start that they had (or only budgeted for) just enough money for their meal, and not enough for a tip. They never ordered less food, or water instead of soda or w/e, in order to afford the tip. They were usually very nice, but !!!

2) Churchgoing people who would say they only "gave God" 10% (tithe) so they just couldn't in good conscience give you more than that. Never mind the only thing tip and tithe have to do with each other is a percentage sign. The old waiter rejoinder was, "Great! Just give me 10% of your salary, then!"

If you think that the only people who tip poorly got bad service-- or even that the only people who tip poorly at least BELIEVE they got bad service-- I have news for you.

If you aren't making the income you demand, then find a differs t job.

Tip is a tip. Its not a payment or a salary/income. The real issue is these businesses should be paying a salary and they aren't.

A tip is generally 15%. Bad service 10%. But, if you do very little as a server, don't expect much. You don't deserve $10 for 5 minutes of work.

5 minutes? 5 minutes?? I've been tipped $2 serving a table that stayed 2 hours, fetching their meals and waters! While I could have been getting more worthwhile customers. That's almost two hours spent watching the table that overstayed to make sure they need anything. You sound like you don't deserve more than 5 minutes of our time.

Them taking up a table for two hours doesn't mean you worked with them two hours. A meal is one dish, maybe two. You bring it out one time. You bring water once, and refill 1-2 times. Really, not that much work.

No one who has ever waited tables would say this. You wouldn't last one shift, PP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I tip 20% for adequate service, 25% for very good service, and 15% for poor service. I'd prefer to do away with the tipping system altogether, raise menu prices 20%, and pay the servers a fair wage.

+1
I'm always trying to pay the bill when out with my parents because they pay 15% tip and I find that horrifying. I will be on high alert to steal the check and pay and tip decently if its a place I frequent.

15% is standard.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:30’s families, 20s and 30’s couples tip the best. Most older women do not tip well. Most but not all older men do. The after church crowd is both notoriously needy, rude, and poor at tipping and that generalization is 100% true.

That may be because all women over forty are typically not provided as good customer service. So they’re less inclined to tip well when they haven’t been treated as well. Waiters etc. provide better customer service to men. This is true even in circumstances where they aren’t tipped, like flight attendants.

How do they still manage to tip you badly even after they've been nice to you and you have been nice to you(vice versa)?

NP with serving experience.

Because they:

1) Don't understand how to tip. Ignorance, willful or otherwise. English visitors were lovely and often fit into this category. Teenagers, too.

2) Believe tipping is truly optional, instead of technically optional.

3) Have a twisted religious justification for tipping poorly or not at all.

4) Are so rich they don't even think about people needing this money to literally pay their bills. Kind of an inverted Lucille Bluth. "It's $10, Michael. What could that buy, a banana? Big deal." If they even gave it that much consideration. To them, tipping 10% instead of 20% on a $200 bill and reducing the tip by $20 was the same as shorting someone a penny. Insignificant.

5) People who think servers are lovely and all, but only "take down your order" and are no more deserving of a tip than a cashier. See this thread.

6) Relatedly, and in conjunction with one or more of the above, have no idea that otherwise, most servers make $2.13 an hour.

All of the above people can be perfectly pleasant customers and would happily tell you they got great service. Sometimes they'll even compliment you to your manager, as if that pays your bills.

A couple of uncommon but not rare ones were:

1) People who came in and sometimes even told you from the start that they had (or only budgeted for) just enough money for their meal, and not enough for a tip. They never ordered less food, or water instead of soda or w/e, in order to afford the tip. They were usually very nice, but !!!

2) Churchgoing people who would say they only "gave God" 10% (tithe) so they just couldn't in good conscience give you more than that. Never mind the only thing tip and tithe have to do with each other is a percentage sign. The old waiter rejoinder was, "Great! Just give me 10% of your salary, then!"

If you think that the only people who tip poorly got bad service-- or even that the only people who tip poorly at least BELIEVE they got bad service-- I have news for you.

If you aren't making the income you demand, then find a differs t job.

Tip is a tip. Its not a payment or a salary/income. The real issue is these businesses should be paying a salary and they aren't.

A tip is generally 15%. Bad service 10%. But, if you do very little as a server, don't expect much. You don't deserve $10 for 5 minutes of work.

5 minutes? 5 minutes?? I've been tipped $2 serving a table that stayed 2 hours, fetching their meals and waters! While I could have been getting more worthwhile customers. That's almost two hours spent watching the table that overstayed to make sure they need anything. You sound like you don't deserve more than 5 minutes of our time.

Them taking up a table for two hours doesn't mean you worked with them two hours. A meal is one dish, maybe two. You bring it out one time. You bring water once, and refill 1-2 times. Really, not that much work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
So it's all about the tip, is it?
Pray, what is a low tip to you?

I'd rather pay more taxes and vote for politicians who want to raise the minimum wage than tip more than 20% for exceptional service (15 for standard, and lower or nothing for bad service).

You are part of the problem, OP - a generation of idiots who seek waiter jobs for the tips. No, you should be fighting for a decent wage instead. You are holding yourself back, and holding everyone back.

Oh, bless your heart. Not OP, but do you really think servers aren't also fighting for a decent wage? Do you... do you think that they want to be paid $2.13 an hour and be at the whim of leering weirdos who expect you to laugh at their jokes and parents who let their kids literally and deliberately crush wet Cheerios into the fabric of the booth benches?

Silly servers, holding the whole of society back like they do. For, you know... reasons. Or something.

Most parents don't allow their kids to behave that way. We did not.

They are choosing to work a job that "pays" $2.13. Plenty of other jobs available that pay much more.

Anonymous wrote:I am a college age server in the NOVA area. I have a few questions.

Why is that so many people are plain rude and condescending to servers? What do you feel entitled to, especially the people that give horrifically low tips? Part of the cost of eating out is the tip. If you can't use a restaurant's table service(meaning sitting down, getting served...) with basic human courtesy, don't pay for it. Go get takeout and sit somewhere else.

Anonymous wrote:Kind of off the general discussion, but I've never gotten you tip a percentage of your final bill.

Two people at restaurant. Friend-1 is not that hungry and orders a salad and water. Friend-2 orders steak, two premium ala carte sides and has 3 glasses of wine. Friend-1's bill is $12. Friend-2's bill is $45.

In both cases, server brought water and menus, took orders, brought food, checked back if anything else was needed. But Friend-2 has to pay more than 3 times Friend-1 for basically the exact same service.