Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I have responded with the “ I plan to breastfeed for a year” because that was not the question of my thread. I posted about my husband not being supportive. I didn’t post here specifically at first because I didn’t want the “ just formula feed” or comments about why I chose to breastfeed or that I shouldn’t listen to the medical professionals.

I’m not anti-formula. I have a good supply and don’t need it, but I’m willing to add in formula if I need it in the future.

It’s been hard. I didn’t expect to have these issues. I trust the medical professionals and will not stop giving a bottle because my baby not gaining weight was not normal. Some advice saying to stop bottle feeding and that my baby not gaining weight is fine is just plain dangerous advice. I went on another site and that was the exact responses I got that thought it was normal until I realized it wasn’t. It may have worked out for you in the end, but advising moms to do that is dangerous and not safe.

I plan to breastfeed for a year. I will probably try nursing for another month and switch to pumping if it doesn’t get better. Pumping is fine but I would rather nurse. He is getting better at nursing but sometimes it’s harder to keep him eating. He does take more in though then he did when he did in the first two weeks. I’m hopeful he will become stronger and be able to nurse without needing a bottle. We feed him all he wants to eat and never limit his intake. We do feed with a slow flow nipple but he still eats all that he wants.

My husband was very supportive at first. Now he isn’t. He agrees that nursing is important, but thinks I should follow up nursing with formula to make things easier. What he doesn’t understand is I’m usually still full on one side or sometimes both and need to pump to feel some relief after nursing. The lactation consultant said my supply will decrease if he only eats 1oz at a time and my body thinks that’s all I need to make every 2-3 hours. I make double that and don’t want to lose my supply since I want to breastfeed.

When I tell my husband how the day was or if we had a hard day he tells me “ I don’t want to hear it.” When I try to explain how he isn’t supportive he tells me he has offered solutions and if I don’t take them, he doesn’t care to talk about anything breastfeeding. I can’t even mention breastfeeding without him getting annoyed. If I tell him about a day that went well, he just is like “ that’s good” and that’s that. I just wish I had a partner who was more supportive and wanted to hear about my day and how things went.

He gets plenty of time with the baby and he does bottle feed when he’s home after I nurse. He spends most of the evening with the baby and then a lot of the time on the weekend.

Look, OP, I'm super annoyed with your responses here, so no wonder your husband doesn't want to hear it anymore. Stop talking about it and stop complaining. Your husband is right - he's offered you solutions and you haven't taken them, so either stop talking about it, or do something about it.

#teamhusband

I’m sorry for whatever is happening to you that makes you speak to someone with a four week old baby this way.

Anonymous wrote:Being breastfed will save your kid from suffering GI problems and food allergies (especially dairy).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I have responded with the “ I plan to breastfeed for a year” because that was not the question of my thread. I posted about my husband not being supportive. I didn’t post here specifically at first because I didn’t want the “ just formula feed” or comments about why I chose to breastfeed or that I shouldn’t listen to the medical professionals.

I’m not anti-formula. I have a good supply and don’t need it, but I’m willing to add in formula if I need it in the future.

It’s been hard. I didn’t expect to have these issues. I trust the medical professionals and will not stop giving a bottle because my baby not gaining weight was not normal. Some advice saying to stop bottle feeding and that my baby not gaining weight is fine is just plain dangerous advice. I went on another site and that was the exact responses I got that thought it was normal until I realized it wasn’t. It may have worked out for you in the end, but advising moms to do that is dangerous and not safe.

I plan to breastfeed for a year. I will probably try nursing for another month and switch to pumping if it doesn’t get better. Pumping is fine but I would rather nurse. He is getting better at nursing but sometimes it’s harder to keep him eating. He does take more in though then he did when he did in the first two weeks. I’m hopeful he will become stronger and be able to nurse without needing a bottle. We feed him all he wants to eat and never limit his intake. We do feed with a slow flow nipple but he still eats all that he wants.

My husband was very supportive at first. Now he isn’t. He agrees that nursing is important, but thinks I should follow up nursing with formula to make things easier. What he doesn’t understand is I’m usually still full on one side or sometimes both and need to pump to feel some relief after nursing. The lactation consultant said my supply will decrease if he only eats 1oz at a time and my body thinks that’s all I need to make every 2-3 hours. I make double that and don’t want to lose my supply since I want to breastfeed.

When I tell my husband how the day was or if we had a hard day he tells me “ I don’t want to hear it.” When I try to explain how he isn’t supportive he tells me he has offered solutions and if I don’t take them, he doesn’t care to talk about anything breastfeeding. I can’t even mention breastfeeding without him getting annoyed. If I tell him about a day that went well, he just is like “ that’s good” and that’s that. I just wish I had a partner who was more supportive and wanted to hear about my day and how things went.

He gets plenty of time with the baby and he does bottle feed when he’s home after I nurse. He spends most of the evening with the baby and then a lot of the time on the weekend.

Don’t listen to the people on here who say it’s dumb to want to breastfeed. Many women have challenges the first couple months of breastfeeding. It’s up to you to decide if it’s worth it. I decided to stick with breastfeeding because it was important to me. I had many challenges just like you. My issue was that I’m busty with very small nipples that made it hard for my kids to latch. I did a mix of pumping and nursing with a nipple shield for the first two months with both kids. Both ended up nursing on their own as they got older and stronger. I breastfed both of my kids for a year. I don’t regret it.

My husband was super supportive. I think you need to find people going through the same thing to talk to. You need support. It’s okay to switch to formula or supplement if it becomes too much, but it’s not stupid or unrealistic if you choose to stick it out and breastfeed.

Also, the nonsense by one poster of your husband not spending time with the baby is dumb. Many moms breastfeed newborns and their husband still spend time with the baby. Men can bond with their babies without needing to bottle feed. My husband spent a lot of time with our kids as babies and he never cared about whether he got to feed them. Do what works for your family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to reframe your complaints. Make sure they’re about fussy baby and not breastfeeding.

My Dh LOVES breastfeeding. It means he never has to get up in the middle of the night to feed. He loves how easy it is to travel without bottles or formula. And he loves that she calms down easily by nursing. In reality he didn’t care whether I breastfed or not, but there were a lot of benefits in it for him. So start telling your Dh all about husbands who have to take every other shift at night instead of you just nursing quickly and then plopping baby in bassinet. (And I’m pro formula too, so don’t take this paragraph the wrong way)

OP here. My baby doesn’t nurse quick. Every feeding takes 45 minutes.

How old is your baby? I think you need to give yourself an end date for breastfeeding. Like if it’s not working by 6 weeks I will start formula and be happy about it. Don’t make yourself miserable. Triple feeding should go on for more than a week in my opinion. It’s hard and can easily make you not like the baby and hate breastfeeding.

Be kind to yourself. It’s okay if breastfeeding isn’t for you. You have a baby! And breastfeeding is such a tiny part of an amazing baby experience. Don’t let it ruin these first few weeks.

OP here. He’s 4.5 weeks old. I’m determined to breastfeed and want to go for at least a year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife: “BF is hard but I think it’s worth it so I want to continue.”

Husband: “OK, I support that decision. I bought some formula in case you need it.”

Wife: “BF is hard and here’s all the hard things about today.”

Husband: “Sorry to hear that. I bought some formula in case you need it.”

Wife: “BF is hard and here’s all the hard things about today.”

Husband: …

Like, at this point, WHAT DO YOU WANT from him, specifically? I notice you failed to answer that question.

Np Saying you bought formula is not supportive. How about just listening and giving her a back rub or getting her some water/food?

Anonymous wrote:Wife: “BF is hard but I think it’s worth it so I want to continue.”

Husband: “OK, I support that decision. I bought some formula in case you need it.”

Wife: “BF is hard and here’s all the hard things about today.”

Husband: “Sorry to hear that. I bought some formula in case you need it.”

Wife: “BF is hard and here’s all the hard things about today.”

Husband: …

Like, at this point, WHAT DO YOU WANT from him, specifically? I notice you failed to answer that question.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’m going to take the advice from some on here and get in touch with a moms group or maybe a therapist to have someone to discuss this with.

My marriage is fine. My husband spends plenty of time with the baby. We talk every night and our relationship is good. We still talk and have a loving relationship. The only issue is he doesn’t want to hear about the breastfeeding issues because he feels like I’m making it hard on myself when there were solutions that could abscess made it easier. He still wants to hear about our day and checks in with me. He just doesn’t want to hear about breastfeeding. We still talk every night and our relationship hasn’t changed.

Anonymous wrote:Being breastfed will save your kid from suffering GI problems and food allergies (especially dairy).

Anonymous wrote:Being breastfed will save your kid from suffering GI problems and food allergies (especially dairy).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being breastfed will save your kid from suffering GI problems and food allergies (especially dairy).

Absolute bull$&it! I was breastfed and
GI problemd and lactose intolerant. Where did you get this crap and wrong information!?

Anonymous wrote:Being breastfed will save your kid from suffering GI problems and food allergies (especially dairy).