Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

Why can't you buy her the coat or iPad with child support? Why does she need a $300 coat? Did she outgrow her coat or she's just demanding a new one? Why can't she get a $60 coat? Why can't she save for three months from her allowance and buy the coat? What's wrong with her current iPad?

Stop. I don't know where one buys $60 coats. Walmart? Or is it a jacket and kid shivers all winter? poor kid

One buys $40 winter coats at Costco that keep you very warm no matter what the weather.

This, Child does not need a $300 coat. And, if you want her to have a $300 coat you can use the child support and your money for it. Problem solved. I don't wear a $300 coat, so no way would I get one for a child who is still growing. And, nothing wrong with Walmart coats.

If you shop at Costco, you probably blow a lot more than $300 there. The $40 coat is the hook. I will take our reasonably priced coats, not from Walmart, instead. Costco budget: $0

OP: How much do you get monthly in child support? What else does Dad pay for each month - activities, clothing, allowance? How much outside of the child support are you sending - child support pays for clothing, household expenses, food?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here I did allow visits it was just supervised with either myself or my brother until she was 12. It was trips to the park, the movies, shops, playing in my house. When she was 12 they did an overnight trip and then when she was 14 I let her fly and visit. I facilitated a relationship between them.
I take her on vacation along with my other dd, I buy groceries and have household expenses I do mother daughter dates

It’s not normal for a dad to need supervised visits. He should have been able to fly out, pick her up and fly her back to his house.

Child support is paid. I have teens and I don’t give them any allowance. You need to butt out of this relationship.

There is no relationship. That is the problem. Dad is only allowed to have a relationship by flying out with mom or uncle supervising and its basically to take the daughter shopping for what she needs as Mom will not spend the child support on the child to buy what DD needs. Parks, movies, shopping and playing at the house is not parenting time. The uncle gets more of a relationship than Dad does.

Dad's not chasing your or DD anymore. If you want her to have a relationship, she needs to fly out and visit and you share the costs.

You are the problem, not Dad.

This is about money, not the relationship.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

Why can't you buy her the coat or iPad with child support? Why does she need a $300 coat? Did she outgrow her coat or she's just demanding a new one? Why can't she get a $60 coat? Why can't she save for three months from her allowance and buy the coat? What's wrong with her current iPad?

Stop. I don't know where one buys $60 coats. Walmart? Or is it a jacket and kid shivers all winter? poor kid

One buys $40 winter coats at Costco that keep you very warm no matter what the weather.

This, Child does not need a $300 coat. And, if you want her to have a $300 coat you can use the child support and your money for it. Problem solved. I don't wear a $300 coat, so no way would I get one for a child who is still growing. And, nothing wrong with Walmart coats.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here I did allow visits it was just supervised with either myself or my brother until she was 12. It was trips to the park, the movies, shops, playing in my house. When she was 12 they did an overnight trip and then when she was 14 I let her fly and visit. I facilitated a relationship between them.
I take her on vacation along with my other dd, I buy groceries and have household expenses I do mother daughter dates

It’s not normal for a dad to need supervised visits. He should have been able to fly out, pick her up and fly her back to his house.

Child support is paid. I have teens and I don’t give them any allowance. You need to butt out of this relationship.

Allowance should come out of child support as well as clothing and other personal items and activities. There is zero reason the visits had to b supervised till age 12. The child support pays for groceries and house hold expenses. That is what you get child support for. You set up this situation. He isn't a father. He's a child support check. He's setting boundaries finally and you are angry. Grow up and get a job.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

Why can't you buy her the coat or iPad with child support? Why does she need a $300 coat? Did she outgrow her coat or she's just demanding a new one? Why can't she get a $60 coat? Why can't she save for three months from her allowance and buy the coat? What's wrong with her current iPad?

Stop. I don't know where one buys $60 coats. Walmart? Or is it a jacket and kid shivers all winter? poor kid

One buys $40 winter coats at Costco that keep you very warm no matter what the weather.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

Why can't you buy her the coat or iPad with child support? Why does she need a $300 coat? Did she outgrow her coat or she's just demanding a new one? Why can't she get a $60 coat? Why can't she save for three months from her allowance and buy the coat? What's wrong with her current iPad?

Stop. I don't know where one buys $60 coats. Walmart? Or is it a jacket and kid shivers all winter? poor kid

Anonymous wrote:OP here I did allow visits it was just supervised with either myself or my brother until she was 12. It was trips to the park, the movies, shops, playing in my house. When she was 12 they did an overnight trip and then when she was 14 I let her fly and visit. I facilitated a relationship between them.
I take her on vacation along with my other dd, I buy groceries and have household expenses I do mother daughter dates

It’s not normal for a dad to need supervised visits. He should have been able to fly out, pick her up and fly her back to his house.

Child support is paid. I have teens and I don’t give them any allowance. You need to butt out of this relationship.

OP here I did allow visits it was just supervised with either myself or my brother until she was 12. It was trips to the park, the movies, shops, playing in my house. When she was 12 they did an overnight trip and then when she was 14 I let her fly and visit. I facilitated a relationship between them.
I take her on vacation along with my other dd, I buy groceries and have household expenses I do mother daughter dates

Anonymous wrote:OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

Why can't you buy her the coat or iPad with child support? Why does she need a $300 coat? Did she outgrow her coat or she's just demanding a new one? Why can't she get a $60 coat? Why can't she save for three months from her allowance and buy the coat? What's wrong with her current iPad?

Anonymous wrote:OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

OP, if he is paying for everything, what exactly is the child support being used for? And, how much are you contributing to your child's needs? Child support should buy an iPad or coat. He is married now and has a second child. He is not a human ATM. You and your daughter are using him for money. And, on top of it you are pocketing the child support if he's paying for all the clothing, electronics, activities and more. Why is he paying all that, child support and an allowance? You need to step up and use the child support on her and get a job and pay for her needs. $300 coat for a teen is absurd. A new iPad when the old one is fine is absurd. A gym membership is absurd.

If you are getting child support and he's paying all expenses and the allowance, yes, you an afford to take her out there. He sounds like a really good dad now setting limits to a chid you raise to be very entitled. IF she gets $100 a month from him plus child support and has savings, she should pay for the driving lessons, new iPad, gym membership and all that. Or, you should pay as that is why child support is for.

What you are talking about tis thousand's a month for supporting DD between child support and all the extra's. You aren't contributing a dime to your child's care and are complaining he needs to cut back when you also have a second child who you actually do support.


Maybe she should just go live with Dad as an option?

You are really terrible. You are here slamming Dad who pays for everything and you refused visits for 16 years except supervised limited visits when he'd come to you and are now complaining about what the relationship looks like. He moved on. Good for him. He's setting boundaries with DD. Good for him. He's still paying child support and many of the extras and instead of being thankful and you getting a job to pay for the rest of the things you think she deserves, you are complaining.

OP here again I'm not sure why I'm being attacked. He paid for child support, tuition, gym and when he would visit he took her shopping. There was no budget then and now he is starting to say no to things like an iPad and when she asked for coat which only costs 300 dollars he said she needs to put half in or ask me. Which is trying to make me look like a bad parent he is no longer wanting to pay for her gym membership saying it's safer to do work outline or perhaps outdoors. Seems like he is just putting the baby his new baby first so no wonder she is upset. Her montly allowance is awful from him 25 dollars in checking and 75 in saving.
I can't afford to pay her flights. As he was buying all her clothes I didn't really have to.

She will get used to it

Your child sounds like a brat

DD doesn't know sibling so she cannot like or dislike that child. She is upset as she wants a relationship with her Dad and you blocked her all these years. Now she feels replaced as they, like you had another child. Of course, DD is upset and feels left out. And, yes, its ok for Dad to cut back on gifts as he is paying child support and extra's and basically footing the entire bill for DD and now he has two children to support. If Dad is not comfortably flying out and stepmom is not comfortable having DD in her home, the best solution since they have a newborn is for you to fly out with DD and get a hotel and DD and Dad can spend time together outdoors. That's no different from when Dad visits DD in your home. If he's done it for 16 years, you can now take over and do it a few times. That is fair! And, if he has paid for all the other visits, you can pay for this one out of child support. Problem solved.

And, driving lessons don't cost $3K. You sound like a scammer.