Anonymous wrote:I have three boys in travel and have been watching youth soccer for a long time. Certainly the PPs are right that because he is relatively better compared to the other players in the park, he looks better to you, feels better, and plays with more confidence.

To break it down further, my guess is that it has to do with the speed of play. I see the same discrepancy often when a star from the B team moves to the A team and looks totally lost. So often, the problem is adjusting to the speed of play. The same kid can look like a genius if he has time to look up, or time to take an extra touch, or time to make a decision OR look totally helpless if the speed of play is relatively faster. On the other hand, a less skilled kid who can make quick decisions might adjust much more easily.

I think strong defenses and fast play are two huge factors.

Anonymous wrote:

Bottom line is that he looks better because he is playing against worse kids. It is as simple as that.


And that's where he is feeling confident. Competing with peers or those above your level confidence plays a bigger role than most realize. Most naturally have enough to compete on level. Some have enough to overcome deficiencies in physical aspects. Confidence is a skill that can be learned. So dont feel like its over. Find some books on sports psychology and try some mental exercise with him. What do you have to lose?

That makes sense. He clearly does have a lot of anxiety when playing travel, he has a little physical movement that he does with his hand whenever he is nervous (like public speaking) and he does it all the time during travel games. It's not noticable to most, but since I am his mom, I definitely see it.

Anonymous wrote:

Bottom line is that he looks better because he is playing against worse kids. It is as simple as that.


And that's where he is feeling confident. Competing with peers or those above your level confidence plays a bigger role than most realize. Most naturally have enough to compete on level. Some have enough to overcome deficiencies in physical aspects. Confidence is a skill that can be learned. So dont feel like its over. Find some books on sports psychology and try some mental exercise with him. What do you have to lose?

That makes sense. He clearly does have a lot of anxiety when playing travel, he has a little physical movement that he does with his hand whenever he is nervous (like public speaking) and he does it all the time during travel games. It's not noticable to most, but since I am his mom, I definitely see it.

Anonymous wrote:It's probably his teammates.

At that age the boys are much too self aware and know they are on the bottom or second to bottom team. They may not care enough and a player may not want to show like he is trying too hard.

Bottom line is that he looks better because he is playing against worse kids. It is as simple as that.


And that's where he is feeling confident. Competing with peers or those above your level confidence plays a bigger role than most realize. Most naturally have enough to compete on level. Some have enough to overcome deficiencies in physical aspects. Confidence is a skill that can be learned. So dont feel like its over. Find some books on sports psychology and try some mental exercise with him. What do you have to lose?

Anonymous wrote:Bottom line is that he looks better because he is playing against worse kids. It is as simple as that.

Anonymous wrote:My 14 year old son is on the second to bottom level travel team in his club. He's just mediocre, his better sport is baseball, but he doesn't enjoy it as much. We can afford to pay for travel anyway, so since he loves it, that's fine.

DH and I have started jogging in the local park where DS plays pickup soccer games, and we have noticed that he plays much, much better in these games than travel. He is more relaxed and looser, and his shot seems better. Not only that, he runs faster in these pickup games, and is more aggressive. DH mentioned the kids he is playing against at the park are not as good as his travel opponents, and that is likely a factor, but my son is also noticably different. What gives? He's had a series of different travel coaches, most of whom have been fine. Why does he play better at the free soccer in the park than the soccer with a professional coach that we pay $2K a year for? I don't deeply care, but I do find it weird.

Anonymous wrote:My 14 year old son is on the second to bottom level travel team in his club. He's just mediocre, his better sport is baseball, but he doesn't enjoy it as much. We can afford to pay for travel anyway, so since he loves it, that's fine.

DH and I have started jogging in the local park where DS plays pickup soccer games, and we have noticed that he plays much, much better in these games than travel. He is more relaxed and looser, and his shot seems better. Not only that, he runs faster in these pickup games, and is more aggressive. DH mentioned the kids he is playing against at the park are not as good as his travel opponents, and that is likely a factor, but my son is also noticably different. What gives? He's had a series of different travel coaches, most of whom have been fine. Why does he play better at the free soccer in the park than the soccer with a professional coach that we pay $2K a year for? I don't deeply care, but I do find it weird.