OP, DBT is very effective for self-harm. Have you looked into DBT?

OP here. Thank you all so much for your comments and suggestions.

Anonymous wrote:If you're going to try to hide sharps as a PP suggested (which by the way, didn't work for us because our kid would just break a drinking glass or a plate or a bottle out of a neighbor's recycling), the razor blade in a pencil sharpener is popular and they can easily be hidden in the magnet of a purse closure or phone wallet closure of the magnet on a popsocket.

OP here. The razor blade from a pencil sharpener is what DD has been using.

If you're going to try to hide sharps as a PP suggested (which by the way, didn't work for us because our kid would just break a drinking glass or a plate or a bottle out of a neighbor's recycling), the razor blade in a pencil sharpener is popular and they can easily be hidden in the magnet of a purse closure or phone wallet closure of the magnet on a popsocket.

It definitely sounds like you could try a different therapist, especially one that specializes in cutting if the current one does not. DD's relationship and rapport with her current therapist, as well as their training, may not be effective enough to help her. Switching therapists greatly helped our DD when one didn't seem to be helping after months.

One thing that helped my DD when she was tempted to cut was to put a hair band on her wrist. When she felt the need to release the strong emotion through cutting, she would pop her wrist with the hair band. It gave the same sensation of pain and release but did not leave a lasting mark.

You can’t actually stop it, but you do need to take it seriously. Hide all your “sharps” which includes scissors, pens, pencils, nail files, razors, nail clippers, kitchen knives, etc.
Let her know you are not mad, and are taking steps to keep her safe.
Go through her room for hidden sharps. Tricks include hiding it in books, cutting a section of pages out and hiding it in there, and cutting a slit in a stuffed animal and hiding it in there.

Every time she does cut, treat the wound with care: wash with soap and water, apply neosporin or similar, and bandage it - even if the cut is superficial. Deep seeded anxiety or depression is likely driving this, and she’ll need treatment. DBT can be outpatient and intensive.

Not all places are great at preventing cutting/self-harm. It can be provider-specific, unfortunately. If choosing residential, make sure you can see her often so you can see how she’s doing.

DBT (individual and group) helped both our DD and us a lot. DD must have been feeling some very deep, difficult emotions to be hurting herself. We still don't know what the cutting was really about as DD hasn't shared with us, but she isn't cutting right now that we know of and she seems happier. I kind of think the whole world should learn DBT skills, to be honest. It's very practical and helpful.

Anonymous wrote:As devastating as the cutting was to us, we tried not to focus on the cutting itself. We told DD that we are going through treatments so that the cutting becomes less of a thing in her life. (Mind you, i did want her to stop but she asked me not to ask so we didnt). She went through years of CBT that continues to today. DBT helped a lot at the time. Lots of calls and texts to the suicide hotline. We didnt pursue in patient or outpatient because of the other exposures she would have gotten. No regrets on that at all and I thank that dcum parent who made us aware of that.

Thankfully, she eventually "outgrew" it and gained better coping skills. It was a very dark time. DD would say to this day that therapy, even though it took a long time, really did help.immensely.

Thank you! Very interesting and helpful post.

As devastating as the cutting was to us, we tried not to focus on the cutting itself. We told DD that we are going through treatments so that the cutting becomes less of a thing in her life. (Mind you, i did want her to stop but she asked me not to ask so we didnt). She went through years of CBT that continues to today. DBT helped a lot at the time. Lots of calls and texts to the suicide hotline. We didnt pursue in patient or outpatient because of the other exposures she would have gotten. No regrets on that at all and I thank that dcum parent who made us aware of that.

Thankfully, she eventually "outgrew" it and gained better coping skills. It was a very dark time. DD would say to this day that therapy, even though it took a long time, really did help.immensely.

Anonymous wrote:Cutting is usually a coping mechanism to get relief from strong emotions. Or it can be a form of self-punishment. If your therapist isn’t effective, switch over to a DBT therapist.

Thanks. This is who we’re looking for as well as inpatient.

Cutting is usually a coping mechanism to get relief from strong emotions. Or it can be a form of self-punishment. If your therapist isn’t effective, switch over to a DBT therapist.

Thank you.

Lots of hospitalizations and residential treatment but it’s now a thing of the past. Therapy did nothing at all. Just not intensive enough.

Anonymous wrote:DD has been cutting herself and it’s getting worse. Her therapist isn’t addressing it enough as she’s still doing it. Does anyone have a recovered cutter and can give us some path or hope? She says she wants to stop but can’t. It’s killing us all.

Thank you.

We used the intensive outpatient program at Dominion. We were prepared to go inpatient, but did not like the options available. DD hated the IOP, but understood not cutting was a condition of getting out of it.We also used a therapist -- DD is still seeing her 5 years later. She has not cut since the 10th grade (that we know of). And she is doing better socially. It is tough and traumatic, but she got through it.

DD has been cutting herself and it’s getting worse. Her therapist isn’t addressing it enough as she’s still doing it. Does anyone have a recovered cutter and can give us some path or hope? She says she wants to stop but can’t. It’s killing us all.

Thank you.