Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind them that one toilet shared by 9 people for three days is a recipe for disaster. And then say no.

OP here. Do you think it would actually kill our plumbing? I admit I never thought of that. The house *was* built in the 1930s!

I agree it does seem a bit much. What about offering to host the adult DDs (they're lovely)? That way basically everyone gets something like a real bed, and it's only... 6 adults and 1 kid? Still too much? No dog in this scenario, at least!

No it will not kill your plumbing.

Just tell them that they'll need to sleep on air mattresses in the basement or where ever you can fit them. Although we did that once and they agreed to our unfinished basement.

I can fit them. There's no basement (it's rented out). It's just a very very tight fit.

OP again. Just out of curiosity, does anyone NOT think it would be a nightmare? Don't worry, I'm leaning against! But this family has all these happy memories of 12 cousins sleeping on the living room floor together while adults took all the bedrooms and everyone shared 1 or 2 bathrooms so...

The more I think about it, I do think older BIL was being shortsighted and self-centered in his way (which he is prone to). "Oh, we'll just stay with X and Y!" Not thinking through the logistics, his brother's allergy, etc. More oblivious than straight up narcissistic, but frankly, maybe a little of Column B as is his tendency. I have a feeling he will be a little put off if we say no, but I guess that's his problem.

(DH will handle it! Not me. I think he's even more comfortable than I am in setting boundaries-- but he also finds this idea at least a little more appealing than I do.)

If this is your husband's family, why isn't he working out the logistics? And why are you getting the crappiest sleeping arrangement of the bunch?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remind them that one toilet shared by 9 people for three days is a recipe for disaster. And then say no.

OP here. Do you think it would actually kill our plumbing? I admit I never thought of that. The house *was* built in the 1930s!

I agree it does seem a bit much. What about offering to host the adult DDs (they're lovely)? That way basically everyone gets something like a real bed, and it's only... 6 adults and 1 kid? Still too much? No dog in this scenario, at least!

No it will not kill your plumbing.

Just tell them that they'll need to sleep on air mattresses in the basement or where ever you can fit them. Although we did that once and they agreed to our unfinished basement.

This is a nightmare. I hope nobody gets a stomach bug.

Anonymous wrote:Remind them that one toilet shared by 9 people for three days is a recipe for disaster. And then say no.

OP here. Do you think it would actually kill our plumbing? I admit I never thought of that. The house *was* built in the 1930s!

I agree it does seem a bit much. What about offering to host the adult DDs (they're lovely)? That way basically everyone gets something like a real bed, and it's only... 6 adults and 1 kid? Still too much? No dog in this scenario, at least!

We have fit that many people and made it work but its very uncomfortable especially when the kids are teens/adults.

I apologize. Our plumbing can’t handle any more guests and we already promised X he could stay here first. We would love to host you at a different time. Could you stay at a nearby hotel instead?

Remind them that one toilet shared by 9 people for three days is a recipe for disaster. And then say no.

"Our house can't fit 8 adults plus my child. We only have one bathroom and you guys would all four be sleeping on the floor in the living room. Plus you probably remember DH is allergic to dogs! We would still love to see you of course but unless we undergo a home renovation for an additional bathroom at minimum, this isn't going to work. I hear there are some good airbnbs within a few miles that allow pets- why not try that and then we can all hang out together during the day after showers etc are taken care of?"

No
Full
Stop

No way!!!

NOPE. This will be hell. He needs to get a nearby airbnb. Ask your neighbors if anyone has a unit.

This sounds like hell. Can the older BIL get a hotel nearby for his crew?

DH, DC (8) and I live in a smallish house with 3 bedrooms containing 2 beds and 1 sofa bed. We also have exactly 1 small full bath-- and that's it.

His younger sibling and spouse arranged to stay with us later this month, which is great. We've had them over before. Bathroom logistics can be challenging, but not too bad with 2-3 guests, which we've hosted pre-COVID. And of course, we've had parties with up to 25 people and it's been okay.

But DH's older brother, who is moving nearby for a short term assignment, is now hinting at an invite for himself, his wife, and two adult DDs, along with their dog, to our house while younger BIL and spouse are staying with us. Proposal is 2 nights, 3 days.

This kinda kills me, because in general I am a "the more the merrier" person and I do love them. They've certainly hosted a few of us at their house for a night or two over the years, but in those cases, the total was more like 6 adults and 2 kids to 4 BR/2BA, with a large main floor. In this case, it would be 8 adults and 1 kid to 3BR/1BA.

In theory I'd like to make it work. Here are more details-- let me know what you think.

-2 people in queen, 2 in full loft bed (DC and probably DH), 2 in full sofa bed (same room as loft bed), 2 on air mattress and 1 (probably me) on non-fold out couch-- just sleeping on the couch in the living room.

-Entire main floor (LR/DR/Kitchen) is about 25x20. We can fit 6 at our dining table and 2 at the counter and 1 maybe a TV tray?

-We do have a little screened in porch though, if the weather isn't disgusting.

-9 people (including 8 adults) to 1 bathroom. Shower sign-up sheet? Portable camping toilet in backyard? (I'm joking... unless?)

-DH is allergic to dogs. They can't/won't leave the dog anywhere else. DH acts like it's no big deal (he loves animals even though he's allergic to half of them), but he has moderate+ asthma. (Older BIL forgot this or doesn't think it's a big deal.)

-Our downstairs tenant had/has a flea problem that is nearly and should be eradicated and isn't affecting us currently, etc. DH has some concern that their dog could get or attract fleas up here somehow. DH mentioned this to older BIL but it didn't deter him or anything.

-We have a fenced yard, but it's an old fence and I don't know if it would contain a *determined* dog. Not sure it's an issue, but just saying.

-We have small caged pets, so would have to keep them 100% away from the dog, but I don't think that would be hard.

-If part or all of older BIL's family instead stayed at the house he will be living in (with a friend), his furniture won't be there yet, and it's 45 minutes from us.

-We haven't all been together in years, we haven't seen younger BIL/spouse in 2 years and only briefly caught 3/4 of older BIL's family once last year.

-Everyone is fully vaccinated except my DC.

Thoughts?