Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With breastfeeding, people's results vary. The payment is up front (first weeks and months) and the benefits come later. I agree with the advice to try first.

In traditional societies when breastfeeding worked, it was due to robust direct support (aunts, sisters, friends, etc). In our society this support comes from lactation consultants and breastfeeding groups, like the one at the Breastfeeding Center. I wouldn't abandon it until you've gotten support and advice first.

What were the benefits? I didn't breastfeed at all. I didn't feel guilty about it so the decision wasn't hard for me. It seems like my friends who did breastfeed did it because they said they would feel guilty if they didn't. What benefits did you see? Just curious.

NP. For me, the benefits were that it was just so easy. Baby’s hungry? Here’s the breast. We did incorporate bottle feeding, so I’ve had experience with both, including in the middle of the night. The easiest way to feed (from my perspective of both breast and bottle-feeding) is breastfeeding. Hands down. Especially in the middle of the night. No prep, no cleanup, no “if I use this bottle now, are there enough clean ones for daycare tomorrow.”

I also enjoyed breastfeeding more than bottle feeding. There is a hormone release that feels great, in my personal experience—it’s this wave of love and connection that washed over me, especially in the early days. The prolactin doin’ it’s thing. I also feel that it helped me to lose weight and get more comfortable in my body more quickly.

But I’m grateful for bottles and formula, and definitely would keep those options in the mix, so that other caregivers can feed, and so there’s not quite so much pressure to produce.

Breastfeeding for me was hard in the beginning with my first but, man, so worth it it terms of ease after the first two weeks. And immediately easy with the second. There is no debate about the benefit of breastfeeding in the first six weeks and you aren’t going to be sleeping much anyway.

Taking out your breast is so easy and convenient once you get established. You never have to warm, make, or wash bottles. You never run out of formula or have to pack bottles if you’re with the baby. My youngest is now nearly ten months and, although no one knows for sure, there seems to be covid immunity passed from the vaccinated mom to the baby.

Try it, OP. You might love it. Get a good lactation consultant and take a breastfeeding class if you can. Try it and then decide.

OP, every woman can and should decide for herself if it’s worth it.

For me, personally, it was one of my favorite parts of the newborn/infant/baby stages. Some of my best memories of being calm, close, connected and snuggling was when we were breastfeeding. I also loved that we always had an excuse to carve out some quiet time during hectic family events and other busy times. There was always an opportunity for me to focus entirely on my babies.

The first time around, it did take some practice. The second time, we were off to the races from the first latch. In both cases, I pumped when I went back to work, and didn’t find that to be a big deal, at all.

Everyone’s mileage will vary on this one. For me, pumping was fast and I got full bottles every time. I have one friend whose supply was so great that she donated milk. And another friend who barely got an ounce when she pumped.

My sister had an easy time of BF from the very first; my cousin had a hard time and it never worked for her, so she switched to formula quickly. It’s such an individual, personal thing.

If you want to try it, that’s great. If you don’t want to, that’s also great. Because either way, you’re going to feed your baby and snuggle with your baby.

Anonymous wrote:Breastfeeding was the singular thing with my first baby that went right. It was easy, painless, and he gained weight immediately and quickly. Everything else went poorly - I healed poorly and was in pain for a long time, I had severe PPD/A, was in an abusive relationship, No support network because I was far from my own family, and it was absolutely the worst year of my life.

Without breastfeeding I don’t think I’d have bonded with my son at all, so I’m glad I did it.

That said, if you’re in a good relationship and have support from family and friends, none of that will be true for you. Do what works for you. Don’t worry about what anyone else says.

There's a myth that all babies in traditional societies thrived and were without breastfeeding problem. This isn't true, many babies died and many babies starved.

If OP or any other woman wants to try breastfeeding that's awesome. But this earth mother myth of this idealistic traditional society of perfectly functioning breastfeeding needs to die.

Anonymous wrote:You cannot sleep train a newborn. In fact, you wake a newborn every few hours to eat, so they gain weight. Beyond that, there is not much scheduling to do and I have seen some parents be extremely cruel because their kid inevitably needs them at an unscheduled time. Please adjust your expectations. Please be there for your kid.

There is plenty for your partner to do, even if you are feeding - bring you the baby, change the baby, get the baby back to sleep. Many people find breastfeeding easier than making up a bottle. I enjoyed it and loved the closeness I felt with my baby. If it doesn't work for you, that's fine. Some people can't or don't want to, and as long as baby is fed and loved it doesn't matter.

But -- having a baby is hard. It will disrupt your sleep. It will change your roles in your marriage, at least temporarily. I am more worried about your expectations than about whether you breastfeed.

Your first lesson is to learn to ignore the smug mommies such as pp

It's worth it if your baby is getting enough nourishment from it. It's worth it if you and baby are both happy doing so and not continuously stressed out over it.

It's okay if you want to try it's okay if you don't. It's okay if you start and decided to stop. It's okay if you don't want to now, but change your mind after the baby is born.


I have 2 children, 2 were formula fed, and 2 were breastfed only. They're all intelligent, well-adjusted, and fully functional adults leading productive lives.

You cannot sleep train a newborn. In fact, you wake a newborn every few hours to eat, so they gain weight. Beyond that, there is not much scheduling to do and I have seen some parents be extremely cruel because their kid inevitably needs them at an unscheduled time. Please adjust your expectations. Please be there for your kid.

There is plenty for your partner to do, even if you are feeding - bring you the baby, change the baby, get the baby back to sleep. Many people find breastfeeding easier than making up a bottle. I enjoyed it and loved the closeness I felt with my baby. If it doesn't work for you, that's fine. Some people can't or don't want to, and as long as baby is fed and loved it doesn't matter.

But -- having a baby is hard. It will disrupt your sleep. It will change your roles in your marriage, at least temporarily. I am more worried about your expectations than about whether you breastfeed.

Breastfeeding was the singular thing with my first baby that went right. It was easy, painless, and he gained weight immediately and quickly. Everything else went poorly - I healed poorly and was in pain for a long time, I had severe PPD/A, was in an abusive relationship, No support network because I was far from my own family, and it was absolutely the worst year of my life.

Without breastfeeding I don’t think I’d have bonded with my son at all, so I’m glad I did it.

That said, if you’re in a good relationship and have support from family and friends, none of that will be true for you. Do what works for you. Don’t worry about what anyone else says.

I found I struggled on the first weeks with baby one. I needed a lactation consultant who got us in the right track. But that made breastfeeding baby two easy! I knew what to do.

There is absolutely no way to tell until you try it.

Anonymous wrote:With breastfeeding, people's results vary. The payment is up front (first weeks and months) and the benefits come later. I agree with the advice to try first.

In traditional societies when breastfeeding worked, it was due to robust direct support (aunts, sisters, friends, etc). In our society this support comes from lactation consultants and breastfeeding groups, like the one at the Breastfeeding Center. I wouldn't abandon it until you've gotten support and advice first.

What were the benefits? I didn't breastfeed at all. I didn't feel guilty about it so the decision wasn't hard for me. It seems like my friends who did breastfeed did it because they said they would feel guilty if they didn't. What benefits did you see? Just curious.

For me, it was easy. It was worth it. Ymmv.

You can't make the decision to breastfeed until baby is here imo. You can make the decision not to breastfeed, but your experience trying will dictate whether breastfeeding with be worth it for you.

That said, if you really want to breastfeed, don't give up because it's difficult at first. A good LC is worth their weight in gold.

With breastfeeding, people's results vary. The payment is up front (first weeks and months) and the benefits come later. I agree with the advice to try first.

In traditional societies when breastfeeding worked, it was due to robust direct support (aunts, sisters, friends, etc). In our society this support comes from lactation consultants and breastfeeding groups, like the one at the Breastfeeding Center. I wouldn't abandon it until you've gotten support and advice first.

I prefer breastfeeding. There were no bottles/nipples/caps to wash/sterilize and keep track of. No making bottles in the middle of the night, I’d just roll over, latch baby on and we’d both fall back to sleep. I had a few latch issues early on but went to a lactation consultant and she helped me figure it out. I find breastfeeding so much easier and more convenient than bottlefeeding.

I’m expecting my first baby in the fall and I’m unsure if I want to breastfeed. I know there are many benefits for baby and mom but it seems very hard. Almost all of my family and friends had issues with breastfeeding from poor latch to supply issues. Most ended up having to pump or supplement with formula. I don’t see the point in breastfeeding and supplementing as it seems like double the work. Pumping seems terrible. Then there is the issue of the mom always getting up and no shared responsibility with feedings or getting any sleep in the newborn days. I’m considering formula feeding but there is some guilt around it for not even wanting to try. I’m also pro schedule and sleep training ( plan for start from birth) and worry breastfeeding will not be conducive to have a baby sleeping through the night and on a schedule. I have many people telling me I should try it first before deciding not to breastfeed. Is breastfeeding really worth it?