DO NOT DO HORSE SHOWS!!

That is where the costs skyrocket. Just tell her that she won't be competing.

---signed, mother who learned that the hard way

That does seem like a lot of really expensive sports, and I too would probably have her do just one. I will say that we pay a ton for figure skating (our biggest expense after mortgage) but it makes DD happy, both because of her love of the sport and her good relationship with her coach, and it’s worth every penny. I don’t demand that she work hard at it or hope she will compete at a high level. It’s something she needs in her life, just like an education or good friendships, so we can’t deny her skating, even if the cost looks crazy to other people.

I did the same thing with my DD. I wanted her to have the experience and challenge of trying things out before fear and boredom sets in at age 12 for us. I did nip horseback riding, way too outrageous. Now she’s into basketball (school team sport) the pandemic is putting a damper on it though. I would encourage her towards a team, school sport. Do the other activities on occasion ie on vacations.

Choose one to focus on.
IDK about the others but if/when she is old enough to work for her horse lessons that's an option as others have mentioned. It's called being a working student. Also you can lease a horse instead of owning one. I have a partial lease on a horse and I get to ride him 2-3 times a week.

How old is she? What’s the school sports situation?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. DD’s riding teacher says she doesn’t need to have her own horse to progress. I’m skeptical as most girls there have their own horse. Everyone on the team certainly does. Is this the first thing I should nip in the bud?

Nip in the idea that she needs to be on a team. If she likes riding she can just ... take riding lessons. You don't have to compete at everything.

Yep, this is what my daughter did. She had no interest in competing; she just wanted to ride.

I have a daughter who figure skates. If your daughter wants to skate recreationally, it is not terribly expensive - you can do group lessons and buy inexpensive used skates. If she wants to skate competitively, it is hideously expensive. My daughter's skates cost close to $1000 for boots and blades. Ice time is $400+ per month, plus private lessons at $50 per half hour.

Anonymous wrote:Op here. DD’s riding teacher says she doesn’t need to have her own horse to progress. I’m skeptical as most girls there have their own horse. Everyone on the team certainly does. Is this the first thing I should nip in the bud?

Nip in the idea that she needs to be on a team. If she likes riding she can just ... take riding lessons. You don't have to compete at everything.

Horses are expensive. She can pick one of those activities, skating and skiing are more practical.

Op here. DD’s riding teacher says she doesn’t need to have her own horse to progress. I’m skeptical as most girls there have their own horse. Everyone on the team certainly does. Is this the first thing I should nip in the bud?

Do it less often? Horses aren’t like figure skating in that you don’t need to be putting in major hours to get to a nice comfortable amateur level.

You can shovel shit to get to ride horses. You can buy used ice skates on Ebay, but that's it - the lessons will always cost the same.

Why all three? Pick one if that’s what your budget allows.

If is willing to muck stalls and help around the stable she might be able to reduce costs, but generally no.

I wanted to let my daughter try anything. A luxury I never had. Well, whoops. She likes the expensive stuff (see above). Are there less expensive ways to participate in these sports (esp Horseback riding).