No one goes on about their ability to pay. That would not be well received. Most schools are need blind. Just fill out your FA if you need it and see if you get enough.

After our four interviews we sent "thank you and why DC would be a great fit for "X" school" emails (we didn't send handwritten letters through snail mail). I sent to each person directly who interviewed us, I remembered the name of the parent who gave us the parent tour after the interview/mentioned them and things we talked about and I noted things about our time on campus during either the interview and/or open days etc.

Once we made our firm, final decision on first choice we sent another letter to just the one school, head of admissions, letting them know we were committing first choice, reminding them of DC, why it would be a great fit for DC and our family etc.

I think it's very important. Our head of 6th grade/outplacement at former school told, not asked, everyone to do this and then inform her of our first choice school so she could further advocate our kids into those schools.

The time between the interviews/thank you emails and the first choice email: months based on how long the process is. So it's not like I felt the school thought I was inundating them.

Anonymous wrote:If you are a full pay family and you kid is bright and well behaved then, yes, write a first choice letter.

In these economic times it helps schools to know what their FA budget is going into making FA decisions and best place for them to be in to make those decisions is to know for sure how many parents who are full pay are def going to commit if offered a spot.

Do people really inform schools that they will be full pay? We did not say one way or the other to any of the schools where our daughter applied several years ago and it didn't hurt her. Schools always say that the financial aid process is separate from admissions - perhaps I was naive to believe that?? Genuinely curious if most full pay families are overt about their ability to pay.

Your kid's application can and should make clear why the school is a great fit for the kid, and, if there is a relevant part of the application for this, a great fit for your family. I'm not sure "first choice" letters work at all (it's just more stuff in the file beyond the core things they look at anyway), and though I can't claim to have worked in the admissions office of these schools, I have worked in grad school admissions for years. Part of putting together a good application is being able to convey why the school is one your kid loves and is interested in--in the application itself. The questions in the application cue this question up time and again, and it is a weak application that cannot answer the questions while simultaneously conveying their fit with and interest in the school--in the application. Tacking on a letter would not change this view so much as confirm it. For whatever that is worth.

Perhaps more importantly, a LOT can change in a short time (hello, 2020?). What if your "first choice" in the fall isn't your first choice come spring, for any number of plausible reasons? Given how unnecessary I tend to think a first-choice letter is, this would push it over the edge for me in terms of not including one.

I will include one exception: If you have turned down a school previously and are reapplying the same kid at a later time or a different kid but in the same family, you might want to include something extra in the application that makes 100% clear why you're reapplying, and then you should find some way--whether through that letter or some other communication--to make very clear that, if you get in, you're coming.

We always sent a short note thanking the admissions folks we met during tours, interviews, and the like, but ultimately didn't send a 1st choice letter because we really weren't sure. I think the worst thing you could do is send two first-choice letters. If you do send one, I would keep it short and be able to articulate concisely why the school is the best fit for your child in a way that is meaningful. If you can't do the latter, the letter should be a couple of sentences, max. These people are busy.

We had our child write a first choice letter because the school was a first choice and child went to a k8 that most top students went on to a certain school. That certain school was not our child's first choice and we were worried the first choice school would not think we were serious. This school was also tough to get into and could easily have other great candidates so could see them passing our child over thinking we would send child to the usual natural next school for a good student coming from this k8. It worked and we were happy. K8 did not encourage the first choice FYI. We had our child do it anyway. I do not think first choice means as much if your child is not a top student. I don't think it hurts but it doesn't mean as much from what I am told because every school assumes you would be grateful getting your kid in with so so grades.

If you are a full pay family and you kid is bright and well behaved then, yes, write a first choice letter.

In these economic times it helps schools to know what their FA budget is going into making FA decisions and best place for them to be in to make those decisions is to know for sure how many parents who are full pay are def going to commit if offered a spot.

I just wrote a letter stating it would be nice to get an acceptance for the child of an alumni. The head of the board wrote similar in support.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I was told by the admissions staffer at a big3 (at a school event mid-year once my kid was in the school) NOT to write them. They often turn-off members of the committee.

Really? I've heard just the opposite from admissions people at Potomac, the Cathedral Schools and Maret. They don't want long winded letters, but they do care about yield -- and a brief note that it is your first choice may help, but won't hurt.

You asked all three about writing a "first choice" letter? How many are you planning on writing?

Anonymous wrote:No, I was told by the admissions staffer at a big3 (at a school event mid-year once my kid was in the school) NOT to write them. They often turn-off members of the committee.

Really? I've heard just the opposite from admissions people at Potomac, the Cathedral Schools and Maret. They don't want long winded letters, but they do care about yield -- and a brief note that it is your first choice may help, but won't hurt.

No, I was told by the admissions staffer at a big3 (at a school event mid-year once my kid was in the school) NOT to write them. They often turn-off members of the committee.

^^PP here: if you want it to sound sincere, you write it yourself instead of looking for a sample.

Yes. But it’s disingenuous to write more than one. You send one only to your first choice. Make it really personal: something that you saw during your tour that really resonated with you/ your child; an interaction with a faculty member/ student that convinced you of the perfect fit, etc.

Anonymous wrote:Do you guys think they're necessary/critical? did you do both? or only 1? where can I find a sample of what to write.

I'd bet schools get lots and lots of those, so a generic sounding one will be pointless, and might even come across as insincere. I'd think that for it to have impact, you'd really have to write specifically about personal stuff. HTH.

Do you guys think they're necessary/critical? did you do both? or only 1? where can I find a sample of what to write.