SES is so not worth it. Go private sector- more money and you can afford to have great help or a non-working apouse

DW is one. I’m a non-supv GS14. I have pushed back at my bosses for promotions; I do not want supervisory for tiny GS15 pay bump.

I handle much of kid related things, but my job is still not part time nor parent friendly (it’s sort of like park service, in that WFH is usually hard to do and hours can be unpredictable depending on the ground situation) If I could translate into a much higher paying job in private industry DW would quit, but my field is too niche to make that jump in any reasonable timeframe.

We have 3 kids, youngest is 3, so it’s a slog. She would demote herself but unclear how to accomplish that without lots of weirdness.

I do it. My husband handles a lot of the home care life, we have used au pairs and other child care. You can do it.

My husband is one. I work a regular 40 hour week. We have three kids. Their care all falls on me. Some weeks are nuts and I think I'm going to lose it, others are a bit better

I am one, kids are 6 and 9. My dh works 50 hours a week. You can do it.

Yes, I know several. Two women with one child each, kids are both late elementary, but they've been SES since the kids were toddlers. Their husbands both work. Also know two men. One guy has a stay at home wife; the other has a wife who travels frequently.

At my agency there isn't much difference between the work and hours put in by GS-15 managers and SES. (I'm a GS-15 manager with two kids under 7.) There's nothing about SES that would make it harder to have kids at my agency, vis-a-vis other managerial roles. Travel here isn't tied to being SES or a manager -- I travel less now than I did as a rank and file worker.

If it's something you're interested in, pursue it. You can always step back at the last minute but if you don't put yourself on the track now when you have the chance, you'll never even have the opportunity to try for it.

Yes, my wife was SES while I also worked full time. It was stressful but doable. We had a nanny from 3 to 7 pm every day who fed the kids and drove them to things if necessary.

we did occasionally have stress about who was going to be home on time, and every now and then when we were meant to be on work travel at the same time.

But I don't think it would have been much less stressful if she were a high gs level...

Yes - my DH. Youngest was 5 when he started as an SES and I work FT but took myself off partner track. To echo others, you can not have 2 "Majors" without outside help. You can have 1 Major and 1 Minor OR 2 Minors.
A partner in my organization shared this perspective. She and her husband were both consulting partners. They made it work with lots of outside help. She was very clear that it was a requirement to flex to the demands of the schedule expectations.

Regarding SES, I think it is very agency specific regarding the culture and expectations for hours. DH's current agency is very family friendly - 2 of his peers have young kids (2 and 4 year old for 1 co-worker, 3 and 6 year old for another). At his previous agency, most SESers had older kids. College or empty nester.

My female boss of 3 years is a SES with a 10th grader currently. She has a husband in the fed gov as well, but does have a hard stop two days a week to tend to her family.

My husband is one. I work full time. After we had our first child I took a “demotion” to a non supervisory role with minimal travel at my agency and have been on the mom track ever since. You have to look at the big picture-this is definitely what works best for our family (we now have 3 kids), but I would be lying to you if I never think about what if I had stayed “all in” the game. I helped write my husband’s ECQ‘s, discuss work issues with him all the time so I know I could have done it. But here we are. And as a result I have thrown myself into the kids, tennis, our house, etc. Going to work (when we were in the office) was the easiest part of my day. For one of you- this has to be the case unless you have full time help. Good luck!

Yes, my friend is SES and his wife is a consultant. They have a 5 year old and 3 year old. They have an au pair, too.

No. I know a woman with kids who became an SES and had to quit in under a year because it wasn't family friendly. All the other SES I work with are childless women, or men with older kids.

Yes, my former boss, woman in her 40s, kids were about 5 & 8. Traveled internationally 1-2x/month. Husband also working though I think not as high level a position. She had an au pair to help her out. I think having reliable, flexible childcare (grandparent, nanny etc) is key.

I only know one at my agency. She seems stressed out all the time but they make it work. Her husband works full time as well but I'm not sure what he does. By young, I mean she has one kid in elementary school and another in middle school. All the other SES-ers I know at my agency don't have kids or their kids are grown.

If so, does their spouse work? Trying to figure out if this is something I should pursue. Obviously not a sure thing, but I’ve been encouraged to think about taking steps toward it in the future.