Um, it's not that he won't leave you alone. It's that you won't leave.

LEAVE.

Break up with him. You aren’t in a real, healthy relationship. If you need to move, move. He may get angry. You will feel sad. None of that can keep you from doing what you need to do. You are a plant and he is ivy smothering you. Rescue yourself. If you have friends or family, lean on them for support. You will look back and thank yourself for freeing yourself from him.

Doesn’t matter if you’re ugly or if you’re a beauty queen. There are people out there who will love you and treat you well. And I’m betting that being in this relationship has affected how you look and how you present yourself. Dump this guy ASAP! Let us know what happens.

This can't be real.

If you really aren't a troll, then you need to break up with him. Not just "suggest you break up" and let him make the decision. Where is your agency???? You are FINE looking. MOVE. MOVE. MOVE.

and get into some therapy to learn how to love yourself.

Anonymous wrote:I have had the same boyfriend for 11 yrs. He says he loves me and he's attracted to me but he never takes me anywhere even pre covid. We have never been on a real vacation. I've suggested we break up and he gets angry. The first time he had sex with me was when I tried to end it. At that point we had been dating for nearly 5 years. We have had sex a few times since then. He says it's not really his thing. I am a bit awkward not very attractive. I am not hideous but I am objectively not pretty either. We live next door to eachother because he says he likes living alone. How do I break it off for good without feeling bad.

Thank you for any advice or help

Wait, what? Were you raped or was the lack of sex the reason for the breakup and he did it to keep you?

Please move on and realize what a healthy relationship is. This is not it.

Move.

Never feel bad about doing what is best for you. He sure as hell doesn’t feel bad for anything he’s done. Honestly he sounds very abusive, healthy people don’t respond to breakups with anger.

I was stuck in bad relationships for years because I felt bad. Those are years of my youth that I’ll never get back, and now I’m stuck with one of them the rest of my life because we have a child.

Anonymous wrote:He sounds controlling. You need to move.

+1

Anonymous wrote:Are you a troll?
Why would you stay with someone for 5 years that you never had sex with? That’s not a boyfriend, that’s just a guy who is your friend.

And you stayed for 6 more years? You don’t have a boyfriend problem, you have a YOU problem. Get into therapy and figure out why you accepted a crappy relationship for 11 years!

We were young and I was a virgin

Are you a troll?
Why would you stay with someone for 5 years that you never had sex with? That’s not a boyfriend, that’s just a guy who is your friend.

And you stayed for 6 more years? You don’t have a boyfriend problem, you have a YOU problem. Get into therapy and figure out why you accepted a crappy relationship for 11 years!

Maybe he is asexual? Either way it isn't working for you. Just tell him the relationship isn't meeting your needs so you have to move on. Then go no contact. No reason to waste anymore years.

You're going to feel bad - that's just a part of breaking up. You may want to break up with him when your lease is up so you can move at the same time.

He sounds controlling. You need to move.

I have had the same boyfriend for 11 yrs. He says he loves me and he's attracted to me but he never takes me anywhere even pre covid. We have never been on a real vacation. I've suggested we break up and he gets angry. The first time he had sex with me was when I tried to end it. At that point we had been dating for nearly 5 years. We have had sex a few times since then. He says it's not really his thing. I am a bit awkward not very attractive. I am not hideous but I am objectively not pretty either. We live next door to eachother because he says he likes living alone. How do I break it off for good without feeling bad.

Thank you for any advice or help