I hate it when people say that arriving on time is arriving late. If I wanted to schedule something for 5:55 instead of 6, I’d make that arrangement. I don’t like when people show up in my office 30 minutes before their appointment. It creates anxiety for me — now I feel like I’m keeping them waiting even though I planned my schedule appropriately to see them at the appointed time. Showing up at the agreed upon time is the courteous thing to do except for social calls to someone’s house, in which case I arrive about 10 minutes late.

Anonymous wrote:Some people believe 5 -10 minutes early is on time.

Some people think if you say join us for dinner at 6:00, you should arrive a 1/2 hour ahead so you are not showing up right as the meal is being served. This one needs to be spelled out. We we eat around ______, feel free to show up anytime after_____.

Some people are just odd.

This is me. But there are times when I believe it is not appropriate to come early: a party, when friends invite you over, carpooling, pretty much all the examples you listed. Showing up early can be a sign of good work ethic and curtesy, so long as your earliness isn't inconveniencing others.

Anonymous wrote:I think they have anxiety. I hate it. I especially hate when people show up at your house early for an event. So rude!

I always wonder what they do when they are hosting the event and everyone shows up on time. Do they get everything ready, then just sit and wait for an hour?

Some people believe 5 -10 minutes early is on time.

Some people think if you say join us for dinner at 6:00, you should arrive a 1/2 hour ahead so you are not showing up right as the meal is being served. This one needs to be spelled out. We we eat around ______, feel free to show up anytime after_____.

Some people are just odd.

lol to the poster at 9:40. I love making early birds wait in the zoom meeting room!

Like, the meeting is at 10. I'm not getting on at 9:30 to talk about what you had for dinner last night.

Anonymous wrote:Since it’s trending among so many you know - adjust to them.
Start thinking 15 minutes ahead.
3 means 2:45
8:30 means 8:15

OP here. I started doing that with my coworker who then started to adjust earlier. One time we agreed to meet in Tysons at 10 and he was there at 9:00

I asked him just what the hell he was doing and he was flustered, no answer.

It's like he's trying to 'win'.

But there isn't a contest.

Freaking bizarre.

Anonymous wrote:I think they have anxiety. I hate it. I especially hate when people show up at your house early for an event. So rude!

Or they are just a**holes. Like a person who showed up 45 min early to an event at my house with three people we had never met and let themselves into our house using our garage code! The only reason that person even had our code was because of an extraordinarily act of generosity we had done for this person. DH and I were running around doing our last minute stuff, lucky to even have been dressed and not in our undies when all of a sudden there are 4 people in our house.

That's crazy, that's annoying, and they are in the wrong.

I had this colleague who would show up to this huge presentation/meeting I ran twice a semester half an hour early, each time. I would still be setting up equipment, checking the lights, checking the presentation, putting out folders, etc. And she'd sit there or stand there in the way, just inanely chatting.

Finally one day I wised up and showed up earlier than usual, and locked the door to the conference room behind me. I ignored her knocks. When I finally opened the room 10 minutes before the start time, I simply told her I was busy setting up and knew there were plenty of chairs and benches in the hallway. Each end of the hallway also had a sitting area. Water fountains, bathrooms, etc.

It's now a secret pleasure of mine that I don't allow her into Zoom meetings until 5 minutes before start time either. She'll call into the waiting room and sit there for 20 minutes. With apparently nothing better to do.

I'm an early bird and am very prompt, but I ALWAYS entertain myself before the start time of anything. I would never dream of trying to go into a conference room super early while people are setting up. I'd go for a walk, check my messages, or whatever.

Very rude and irritating. But with people who are known to be this way, I say things like: "Billy will absolutely be ready at 5, but he won't be ready any earlier, because we'll be doing X beforehand. If that doesn't work for you, I'll drive him, or I'd be happy to be in your driveway at 5 to pick Jason up."

Or lie and tell people the event starts at 7 so you will be fully ready at 6:30. But it is rude, for sure.

I feel like 5 minutes early is on time, on time is late, but 10 or more minutes early is nuts.

15 minutes is a bit too early to show up; however, the other party was there already, so.....

Since it’s trending among so many you know - adjust to them.
Start thinking 15 minutes ahead.
3 means 2:45
8:30 means 8:15

All of those people are in the wrong. They are all rude.

Anonymous wrote:My coworker and I agree to meet at a client site at 10:30. He shows up at 10:15 and begins introductions. I show up at 10:25 and appear late.

My son's soccer carpool agrees to pick up at 5. They show up at 4:40 and act irritated that he's not waiting on the porch

Friends we invite for burgers and dogs in the yard at 7:00 show up at 6:30. My DH is just getting out of the shower to get dressed


What's wrong with these people?

What?? That’s crazy. Your friends are heathens.

I think they have anxiety. I hate it. I especially hate when people show up at your house early for an event. So rude!

My coworker and I agree to meet at a client site at 10:30. He shows up at 10:15 and begins introductions. I show up at 10:25 and appear late.

My son's soccer carpool agrees to pick up at 5. They show up at 4:40 and act irritated that he's not waiting on the porch

Friends we invite for burgers and dogs in the yard at 7:00 show up at 6:30. My DH is just getting out of the shower to get dressed


What's wrong with these people?