Anonymous wrote:I want my kids to be generous in every way. Generous with a smile, generous with friendship, generous with their possessions. Just generous. It’s all that truly matters.

How do you teach that? How did you learn to teach that?

Empathy, self-love and self-care, communication skills.

Though I think the biggest things I can do to teach this is to model it. I think the world would be better off if we all had this, and I try to live it as much as I can, and fill our lives with people who live it, so that my kid really sees how it works.

I want my kids to be generous in every way. Generous with a smile, generous with friendship, generous with their possessions. Just generous. It’s all that truly matters.

I wanted my kids to be ordinary, to fit in. But they take after DH and me. They aren't ordinary, they don't fit in.

When DS was born it suddenly hit me that it was my job to make sure he didn't grow up to be a mass shooter. May sound strange but it has to do with how serious a responsibility it felt like. Also not a conservative--but I did not criticize him when he voted for George W in his 5th grade class "election". He got over that pretty quickly though.

5 and 8 year olds. I hope for them to find happiness. Part of that will come from finding a solid career so I hope to prepare them for that.

A classical education

10 and 12 year olds. I want them to have a love of learning, appreciation of nature and to be able to enjoy their happiness.

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to fill every part of their day or trying to entertain them constantly. My young kids can play by themselves for long stretches. It’s great.

+1. One of the surprise benefits (or lesson for me) of covid. My toddler seems to learn more and be more creative without the classes I thought were so important to his learning. Standing back and watching him find a million uses for a stick in the park has been enlightening!

Since this is general, it would be interesting if people specified how old their kids are.

I think the answers will really vary from parents of babies versus teens versus adults.

Love of learning

Education

Treating everyone with respect

Simple things like learning to swim, ride a bike, ride the bus is mass transit

Not trying to fill every part of their day or trying to entertain them constantly. My young kids can play by themselves for long stretches. It’s great.

Reducing anxiety or the rat race in my children. I want them to be the best they can be, not compared to...

Yes, absolutely empathy and community. But just to add a bit of flame, I also feel strongly about about education from birth - narrating, talking, reading, and singing to newborns and infants. Adding rich vocabulary before they can even talk. Early reading and early potty training.

... (please fill in what is a priority for you raising your children)



For me, I feel strongly about NOT raising narcissists. I push acknowledgment of feelings and empathy. The “rules” apply to us. We are a part of the community.