Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

That’s exactly right. Instead they spew misogynistic and racist garbage through their video games because nobody is watching. Your kids are exposed to all kinds of things you don’t know about on there.

They do this in the gym, on the playing field and everywhere else.

I’ve never heard my son say anything inappropriate on Xbox live or on the playing field. Sorry your son was so poorly raised though.

Anonymous wrote:If your child is going to have issues with addictive behavior, delaying their access to video games isn’t going to help. If anything, it means that they will first get meaningful access at a time when you can’t provide as much guidance and oversight (eg, college), and they are therefore more likely to get into trouble with it. By allowing kids to have video games while they are still living under our roof, we have the ability to set rules in a way that teaches them healthy ways to manage screen use.

Do you have evidence to support this view? All the research I've seen on addictive behavior suggests the opposite-- that the longer first use is delayed, the less likely addiction is. The research on alcoholism, too take one type of addiction, is unequivocal. Research has found that people whose first exposure to alcohol is at age 13 and 14 are 9 times more likely to develop alcoholism than people whose first exposure is at age 19 or older. Given what we know about the brain chemistry of addiction, there's no reason to think a similar pattern isn't evident with other addictive "substances."

Your opinion about addictive behavior is a common one among American parents. But the reality is that kids who delay drinking e.g. until college are statistically much less likely to get into trouble with it than kids who start drinking in high school (especially early high school).

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/10784467/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

That’s exactly right. Instead they spew misogynistic and racist garbage through their video games because nobody is watching. Your kids are exposed to all kinds of things you don’t know about on there.

They do this in the gym, on the playing field and everywhere else.

Ha! All these parents acting like their sons can’t get sucked into the vide game vortex. Come on. I don’t see a problem w/ some gaming, but let’s be real, it’s addictive. Especially for younger boys.

Anonymous wrote:You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

That’s exactly right. Instead they spew misogynistic and racist garbage through their video games because nobody is watching. Your kids are exposed to all kinds of things you don’t know about on there.

My son has been saving his money for several years...initially for getting a gaming computer, but now would prefer a PS5.

Like the other posters, playing PS4 is his social time (even moreso now that he is home 90% of the time.) By not having extremely strict restrictions, it is relatively easy to get him off when he needs to do other things (sports, cleaning the house, riding bikes with friends, etc.) He also knows that his grades, participation in physical fitness, and attitude is directly correlated to him being allowed to play video games.

Anonymous wrote:You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

This. I never bought my son any gaming systems. He saved his money and bought his own Playstation. He then saved his money and bought a desktop so he could play games on it. He has limits but it is the only way he has socialized since March with a few exceptions.

You can play games with a group of friends online. Boys no longer call each other to talk. They talk while playing games using Xbox or PlayStation. If you have no gaming system it can be hard to be social.

My son started a new school for 5th grade. He now plays with 3 other kids from his school for 30 minutes to an hour in the evening. He would feel really isolated without that connection.

We're getting it because we are capable of parenting our child and limiting his time on it. We lock up electronics when we are not home, and he doesn't have the key, so he can't cheat. It's fine in moderation, which we ensure.

If your child is going to have issues with addictive behavior, delaying their access to video games isn’t going to help. If anything, it means that they will first get meaningful access at a time when you can’t provide as much guidance and oversight (eg, college), and they are therefore more likely to get into trouble with it. By allowing kids to have video games while they are still living under our roof, we have the ability to set rules in a way that teaches them healthy ways to manage screen use.

Anonymous wrote:Our teen son claims every one of his friends is getting one. Are we the only parents who don't allow these addiction machines in our house? I don't understand how parents not only welcome this addiction into their homes, they pay $500+ for the privilege – it's a freaking drug. Boys are far more likely to drop out of college and twice as likely to live at home as adults. These video games are sapping their ambition and attention span, and often end up controling their life.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-creativity-cure/201603/the-silent-epidemic-young-men-dropping-out-college

Psychology Today sucks.

Mine earned it with good grades at a tough private school, and in sports accomplishments. But he will still be limited on time he spends on it.

I suppose it’s a problem if your child has an addictive personality and no other social or physical interests, but that’s not the case for many kids. DS has one and hardly ever plays with it. He’s outside hanging out with other kids right now (within our pod).

Because they're home all day and being shut-in in the fall/winter with only virtual school they'll need something to do.

These parents are being proactive. You'll be up sh*t creek with no paddle with everything sold out for months past Christmas and a teen that hates you.

Good luck.

Our teen son claims every one of his friends is getting one. Are we the only parents who don't allow these addiction machines in our house? I don't understand how parents not only welcome this addiction into their homes, they pay $500+ for the privilege – it's a freaking drug. Boys are far more likely to drop out of college and twice as likely to live at home as adults. These video games are sapping their ambition and attention span, and often end up controling their life.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-creativity-cure/201603/the-silent-epidemic-young-men-dropping-out-college