Anonymous wrote:Before COVID, they had been best friends. They’re both 4. DS kept going to school during COVID, as we’re essential workers, but his friend did not. Just found out his friend is now going back to the school, but has been placed in a different room.

We could request a change, but DS is being placed in an accelerated program (at the recommendation of the school) that we think would be good for him. Apparently his friend has been talking about DS all summer. DS has made some new friends, as young kids do, but I’m sure will be upset to find out his friend is in a different room.

Just wanted to say this sucks. I’m sure they both would have been in the same room without COVID, but my guess is the school is placing his friend in the regular program, solely because he hasn’t been at the school for months and so they can’t evaluate him to see where he is.

time for DS to leave the dumb dumb behind and move forward- college applications are only 14 years away, now is not the time for sentimentality

Anonymous wrote:OP, it took me a while to learn this, but here it is:

Model for your child what is best for your child.

So, instead of saying: "Larlo! Oh no! We are so sad Sammy isn't in your class! We will try to see Sammy whenever we can! It will be ok, I promise!"

Say this instead: "We are so excited that you are in Ms. Smith's class! We can't wait to make new friends! YAY!"

If Larlo asks about Sammy, say "Sammy is a good friend! We will Zoom with him on Friday at 4. Yay!"

I agree with this so long as you also give space to allow your child to express sadness, disappointment, fear of loss of friend, whatever negative emotion they may be feeling. It's important to do both (allow child to have and express any negative feelings/offer empathy AND find the good part of whatever situation is at hand), IMO.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your family's problems are simply enormous. My heart goes out to you.

I never said it was a big problem. We can’t post about small things here?

Of course you CAN. Free speech doesn't mean freedom from commentary. You opened this up, OP.

+1. Especially when you start the thread with "This pandemic sucks."

Because, for many people "This pandemic sucks...

my dad died.
I lost my job.
my cousin is very sick.
my kid has special needs and struggles with remote learning.

This pandemic sucks."

So sure, whine about this, but don't be surprised when people don't trot out the violins for you.

Also, maybe take a second and think about what you're modeling for your kid. You're setting him up for a lifetime of nursing petty grievances.

OP every year this is going to happen to your kid as classes and schools change. This isn't Covid, this is just life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your family's problems are simply enormous. My heart goes out to you.

I never said it was a big problem. We can’t post about small things here?

Of course you CAN. Free speech doesn't mean freedom from commentary. You opened this up, OP.

OP, it took me a while to learn this, but here it is:

Model for your child what is best for your child.

So, instead of saying: "Larlo! Oh no! We are so sad Sammy isn't in your class! We will try to see Sammy whenever we can! It will be ok, I promise!"

Say this instead: "We are so excited that you are in Ms. Smith's class! We can't wait to make new friends! YAY!"

If Larlo asks about Sammy, say "Sammy is a good friend! We will Zoom with him on Friday at 4. Yay!"

In elementary school the kids change each year so there are always some new kids and some old friends. This was hard on me when we had the first big “school year” change in September between 3s and 4s, but my kid took it in stride. Prior to the big school year change, all changes had been gradual - a kid moving away, moving up rooms, a new kid joining. We maintained relationships with families our kids liked and kids come back together on soccer teams or future classes. At our school, pre covid, classes could mix at recess and kids would see old friends that way.

Anonymous wrote:Your family's problems are simply enormous. My heart goes out to you.

I never said it was a big problem. We can’t post about small things here?

So many hardships.

Anonymous wrote:Your family's problems are simply enormous. My heart goes out to you.

LOL.
Sorry, OP. There are so many sucky things about the pandemic, it's hard to believe that this is even worth giving a moment's thought. Your DS and his friend will make new friends and can maintain or reignite their friendship if you are committed to that. It will be ok. I know it's hard to see our kids disappointed, but you will see how fleeting this is as time goes on.

OMG. Get a grip. Your kid is 4. They will make new friends and barely remember the old ones.

They are 4. They'll have a new best friend soon. And if not, keep in touch outside of school.

Your family's problems are simply enormous. My heart goes out to you.

Before COVID, they had been best friends. They’re both 4. DS kept going to school during COVID, as we’re essential workers, but his friend did not. Just found out his friend is now going back to the school, but has been placed in a different room.

We could request a change, but DS is being placed in an accelerated program (at the recommendation of the school) that we think would be good for him. Apparently his friend has been talking about DS all summer. DS has made some new friends, as young kids do, but I’m sure will be upset to find out his friend is in a different room.

Just wanted to say this sucks. I’m sure they both would have been in the same room without COVID, but my guess is the school is placing his friend in the regular program, solely because he hasn’t been at the school for months and so they can’t evaluate him to see where he is.