Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 09:19     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


If it helps, there was never a possibility of giving birth to a man, so nothing was lost on that front.

Vent and then move on. Look at little girls playing softball or whatever you pictured the boy doing to get over this feeling that you're bringing home the wrong kind of baby. If you had an expectation, it's normal to feel like you've lost that future you were planning but you've gained a new one, so focus on that. If you feel like your relationship with your mom is going to present an issue with parenting your daughter, it's smart to see someone to talk that through. You don't have to recreate the same dynamic in this generation.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 09:13     Subject: Gender Disappointment
I never really understood gender disappointment (not in a judgey way but just never felt it before). However, I have a DD and we just found out this baby (our 2nd and last) is also a girl and I've been surprised to feel fleeting moments of "I'll never have a son". I know it's normal and I'm not dwelling. I'm pumped for DD to have a sister, but I think it just takes time to take in the finality of your family. You spend your whole life daydreaming about what your family will be like and it's a lot to take in when you finally KNOW who will complete your family.

Congrats on your girl, OP. My DD is the light of my life and my own mother is my best friend in the entire world. I'm nothing but hopeful for you!
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 07:40     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Feel sad for a few days and then move on. Maybe you were blessed with a daughter to help you work through your issues with women. Often women that do not get along with other women have some internal issues. Hopefully your daughter will motivate you to work through those.


NP here. Internal issues??? WTF?


She already mentioned she and her mom have issues so its not that surprising.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 07:26     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


Well, go ahead and mourn your idea of two boys for a while, but give your little girl a chance. You don't even know her yet. I believe she will surprise you.


This was snarky for no reason. When women post about gender disappointment for having a boy instead of a girl there are always nice messages. Why not give the same support?

OP. I know it sucks but god had other plans for you. Follow his path. You will meet your baby girl and be so in love and overjoyed that you won’t care. You will be a great mom to your little girl.

PP here, I’m sorry, I really didn’t intend this to be snarky at all. I think I’m trying to say the same thing. It’s ok to want two boys, but wait until you meet your little girl, and you will be surprised at how happy you will be.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 07:11     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:Feel sad for a few days and then move on. Maybe you were blessed with a daughter to help you work through your issues with women. Often women that do not get along with other women have some internal issues. Hopefully your daughter will motivate you to work through those.


NP here. Internal issues??? WTF?
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 07:10     Subject: Re:Gender Disappointment
Wow, OP. This baby could have had a major health condition or disability, and here you are complaining about its gender. Count your blessings.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 07:06     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Take a few days to process, then move on. There’s no bigger case of you get what you get and you don’t get upset.

Hell, it could have been twins. Count your blessings!
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 07:01     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Feel sad for a few days and then move on. Maybe you were blessed with a daughter to help you work through your issues with women. Often women that do not get along with other women have some internal issues. Hopefully your daughter will motivate you to work through those.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 01:51     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


Well, go ahead and mourn your idea of two boys for a while, but give your little girl a chance. You don't even know her yet. I believe she will surprise you.


This was snarky for no reason. When women post about gender disappointment for having a boy instead of a girl there are always nice messages. Why not give the same support?

OP. I know it sucks but god had other plans for you. Follow his path. You will meet your baby girl and be so in love and overjoyed that you won’t care. You will be a great mom to your little girl.


Because of the self hate that it shows.

OP is a woman...but she does not want a girl? She prefers being the guy's girl surrounded by boys. And then she wonders why she does not have female friends. She will probably favor her daughter and see her as competition. It's really sad and toxic. Wanting a girl after having a boy is different - it's wanting that mother daughter relationship, especially if you already have a boy


Not OP. I have two boys and I have no self hate. There is nothing wrong with wishing you had a house full of boys or a house full of girls. Would you say this about a man who is disappointed he isn’t having a girl?

I have plenty of female friends but grew up around boys more and always wanted boys. They can be best friends. I would not favor my child or see her as competition if one of my children was a girl. You’re clearly projecting your issues on to OP.

Not every woman wants a girl, and not even man wants a son. Not every women wants a a girl to be best friends with. I’m tired of this stupid bs that women can only want a girl and vice versa. I guess the women who posted about being upset their baby is a boy and not a girl must hate men? That’s what’s you’re equating this to.


There is really something wrong with PP’s logic that she feels women only want a girl. Many women want boys and there is nothing wrong with it.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 01:49     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


Well, go ahead and mourn your idea of two boys for a while, but give your little girl a chance. You don't even know her yet. I believe she will surprise you.


This was snarky for no reason. When women post about gender disappointment for having a boy instead of a girl there are always nice messages. Why not give the same support?

OP. I know it sucks but god had other plans for you. Follow his path. You will meet your baby girl and be so in love and overjoyed that you won’t care. You will be a great mom to your little girl.


Because of the self hate that it shows.

OP is a woman...but she does not want a girl? She prefers being the guy's girl surrounded by boys. And then she wonders why she does not have female friends. She will probably favor her daughter and see her as competition. It's really sad and toxic. Wanting a girl after having a boy is different - it's wanting that mother daughter relationship, especially if you already have a boy


Not OP. I have two boys and I have no self hate. There is nothing wrong with wishing you had a house full of boys or a house full of girls. Would you say this about a man who is disappointed he isn’t having a girl?

I have plenty of female friends but grew up around boys more and always wanted boys. They can be best friends. I would not favor my child or see her as competition if one of my children was a girl. You’re clearly projecting your issues on to OP.

Not every woman wants a girl, and not even man wants a son. Not every women wants a a girl to be best friends with. I’m tired of this stupid bs that women can only want a girl and vice versa. I guess the women who posted about being upset their baby is a boy and not a girl must hate men? That’s what’s you’re equating this to.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 01:04     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


Well, go ahead and mourn your idea of two boys for a while, but give your little girl a chance. You don't even know her yet. I believe she will surprise you.


This was snarky for no reason. When women post about gender disappointment for having a boy instead of a girl there are always nice messages. Why not give the same support?

OP. I know it sucks but god had other plans for you. Follow his path. You will meet your baby girl and be so in love and overjoyed that you won’t care. You will be a great mom to your little girl.


Because of the self hate that it shows.

OP is a woman...but she does not want a girl? She prefers being the guy's girl surrounded by boys. And then she wonders why she does not have female friends. She will probably favor her daughter and see her as competition. It's really sad and toxic. Wanting a girl after having a boy is different - it's wanting that mother daughter relationship, especially if you already have a boy
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 00:56     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


Well, go ahead and mourn your idea of two boys for a while, but give your little girl a chance. You don't even know her yet. I believe she will surprise you.


This was snarky for no reason. When women post about gender disappointment for having a boy instead of a girl there are always nice messages. Why not give the same support?

OP. I know it sucks but god had other plans for you. Follow his path. You will meet your baby girl and be so in love and overjoyed that you won’t care. You will be a great mom to your little girl.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 00:22     Subject: Gender Disappointment
It’s okay. For a while there you had something like shrodinger’s baby. You had both a boy and a girl and you could imagine both. When you see the baby you’ll love her too. Your relationship with your daughter will be your own and nothing like yours with your mom. My kids are opposite sex and they love to play together. I had a sister and didn’t realize how much boy and girl siblings play together.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 00:19     Subject: Gender Disappointment
Anonymous wrote:I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.


Well, go ahead and mourn your idea of two boys for a while, but give your little girl a chance. You don't even know her yet. I believe she will surprise you.
Anonymous
Post 08/25/2020 00:10     Subject: Gender Disappointment
I have an almost two year old son and I’m due with a second baby in March 2021. I just find out I’m having a girl. I’m disappointed. I really wanted two boys. I never had a great relationship with my mom and I just get along better with men. I really wanted two boys and that was it. I’m grateful to be pregnant but I’m bummed.