im so jealous. its a struggle to get my 14 yo to even leave the house, let alone meet up with friends.

It all depends what they are doing. My youngest is 12 and she's been out some nights until midnight. But, there is no set curfew and there is no difference between weekends and weekdays. Everything requires my approval and find my phone being on. Mine doesn't leave the neighborhood. It's not like there is any good reason to get up early.

My ds just turned 14 and this summer is the first time he's stayed out later. Basically just hanging out outside at firepit with small group or something along those lines that is pretty safe. As long as we know where he and who he's with we've let him go till 10:30 or so.

Anonymous wrote:My 13 year old is in bed around 10pm. 10:30 at the latest. I don't see us letting him outside until 10pm anytime soon.

This. What is your child doing after dark out in the world without you or a trusted adult with them? They are 14 not 17. Huge developmental difference.
At 14, without covid I would say I need yo know where he is. If biking general idea of where he is headed etc. who he is with, a general idea of their plan, home before dinner or if going out after dinner home before dark.
During covid, my son has gone on bike rides with friends for a hour or so with masks on but I know where they are and so do the other parents, he diesnt just go out as if he’s in college with complete freedom.
Young Teens need boundaries even without covid. Now they need more.
Also my son is 13 1/2 and is in his bedroom by 10ish. But always home before dinner from bike rides. He talks to friends via phone some evenings.

If he's out there hooking up, then midnight is likely OK as that takes time when younger. If he's out there causing trouble, bring him in.

My 13 year old is in bed around 10pm. 10:30 at the latest. I don't see us letting him outside until 10pm anytime soon.

My 14 year old is a great kid, but no way would I let him hang out with friends without us there during Covid. They all forget because humans are naturally social. Even when we have gotten together as families from a distance with our kids' friends families we have to remind them to stay apart. They naturally move toward eachother.

If Covid weren't an issue we still would expect our kid inside before it gets dark. There is nothing they can be doing outside in the dark. We live near woods so we have all sorts of creatures roaming some of which are nocturnal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wtf. Where is your child going?

This.

+1

My kids hardly go anywhere without us. Actually, they just go together to the park a half a block away and exercise and then come back. They are gone no more than 70 min and always are back before dark.

Stay out to midnight or later doing what? At 14 years old? WTF?

Ok thanks. I figured I was getting gaslit.

At 14, the time my child would need to be home would depend on what he is doing. If he is just out in the neighborhood biking or doing some other activity with friends, then I would want him by dark or shortly after. If it was an organized activity with adults present, then he could stay out later. I would have to know where he is, what he is doing, especially now with covid and the restrictions that are going on, to determine a curfew for that day.

Anonymous wrote:Wtf. Where is your child going?

This.

Wtf. Where is your child going?

Very social? Have you heard of Covid-19?

Weekends and weeknights?

We were saying 9pm weeknights and 10pm weekends but is this too late? Too early?

14 yo would stay out until midnight or later if we didn’t have a rule. He’s very active and very social so thinks any limit is unreasonable. Not that I care about his opinion.