Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a nanny for years and many neighbors also have nanny’s. If you can door dash a lunch every Friday it’s worth it’s weight in gold. It’s just a food karma thing to do. Along with grabbing coffee for her once a week or so if you yourself grab one. The little extras will yield you the good ones. It’s not always about a high hourly, I find these small deeds actually mean almost as much if not more.

This is a good compromise. I'm so glad I'm not crazy. DH thinks its rude not to order her lunch bc he gets himself lunch each day, and if he had a guest over he would include them. I've tried to explain to him that our house is her office... I've already asked her for a list of snacks/drinks/etc that she would like us to have in the house for us.

He orders lunch out every single day? How bizarre.

Anonymous wrote:Poster above- we did that already. This is a hospitality quirk of dh where he feels uncomfortable not offering anyone in the house food if he’s ordering...

He orders from door dash every day for lunch? Maybe the nanny will be a good reason for him to stop doing that?

Poster above- we did that already. This is a hospitality quirk of dh where he feels uncomfortable not offering anyone in the house food if he’s ordering...

Anonymous wrote:This is my first time having a nanny. My dh and I disagree about whether we are supposed to order her lunch everyday or otherwise provide lunch. She starts this week. I’ve already told her to treat our home like hers and eat whatever she wants but he thinks we need to proactively door dash meals for her. I dont even do this for myself. . Can someone give me some guidance on this and also how to approach with nanny? Thanks so much.

Just ask her what she wants to eat (~$50/week maximum) and keep it on hand. Nbd.

Nanny here. My bosses have never provided me with daily meals. If the kids are old enough to eat real food then I cook for them and the parents will often say something along the lines of “I hope you are making enough for yourself too!”

Families will usually also clear out a little space in the fridge and pantry so I can keep some staples at work. Now that everyone is WAH, the parents usually order takeout for lunch once a week and they always offer to buy the kids and me lunch too, but it would be very unusual (not to mention expensive!) to buy her daily lunch.

I think maybe your DH is confused because it is very common to order dinner for date night sitters if they will be there during dinner time and the kid is either not eating solids or only eating like macaroni or something. But that is more of a perk for weekend sitters, since they are giving up a valuable Saturday night, making it as relaxing as possible is a great way to make them prioritize your family.

No, not order her lunch unless you’re getting lunch for everyone home as a special treat. Our nanny brings her lunch but is welcome to anything we have and certainly anything she makes for our little boy’s lunch.

in the house for her*

Anonymous wrote:I had a nanny for years and many neighbors also have nanny’s. If you can door dash a lunch every Friday it’s worth it’s weight in gold. It’s just a food karma thing to do. Along with grabbing coffee for her once a week or so if you yourself grab one. The little extras will yield you the good ones. It’s not always about a high hourly, I find these small deeds actually mean almost as much if not more.

This is a good compromise. I'm so glad I'm not crazy. DH thinks its rude not to order her lunch bc he gets himself lunch each day, and if he had a guest over he would include them. I've tried to explain to him that our house is her office... I've already asked her for a list of snacks/drinks/etc that she would like us to have in the house for us.

No. She doesn't get lunch from restaurants each day, paid for by you. We looked at what our nanny was eating, and said "Put what you'll eat for lunch and snacks on our grocery list," and we've done that for years.

I was a nanny for 5 years and was with 3 families. Family 1 expected me to bring my own lunch but also had plenty of snacking food that I was told I could help myself to. But they had pretty strict dietary restrictions (not allergy related) and while nthey didn't care what I ate they were not going to go out and buy foods that they didn't normally buy. No big deal.

Family 2 was basically help yourself to whatever and here is petty cash you can use to buy lunches or whatever you want. While it wasn't meant for specifically the kids, I usually used it on a weekly adventure and treats for them.

Family 3 specifically asked what I ate for lunch and would supply it weekly.

All those options were fine with me. The best though was families 1 and 3 ensured I had downtime to actually eat which involved the kids being allowed 30 min of electronics after their lunch. It was so nice to have that "off" time.

Agree with the PP. If you have her preparing the family lunch or someone else doing it make it clear she is always included in that number.

I had a nanny for years and many neighbors also have nanny’s. If you can door dash a lunch every Friday it’s worth it’s weight in gold. It’s just a food karma thing to do. Along with grabbing coffee for her once a week or so if you yourself grab one. The little extras will yield you the good ones. It’s not always about a high hourly, I find these small deeds actually mean almost as much if not more.

No way!!

What? Like everyday?
That's a nice gesture, but completely unnecessary. If you are home and are ordering food, I'd get something for her as well, but otherwise, she can bring her own lunch or eat whatever you/child are eating.

This is my first time having a nanny. My dh and I disagree about whether we are supposed to order her lunch everyday or otherwise provide lunch. She starts this week. I’ve already told her to treat our home like hers and eat whatever she wants but he thinks we need to proactively door dash meals for her. I dont even do this for myself. . Can someone give me some guidance on this and also how to approach with nanny? Thanks so much.