It sounds like you both have some major red flags going on. I"m curious as to how old you are? Also, I agree with PP who said it sounds like his mom wisely said not to put you on his insurance.

Anonymous wrote:The issue isn't whether or not you should have asked him.... you did and he agreed, and then he flaked out on you. Huge red flag. You can't rely on him, because even when you tell him something is important to you, he doesn't care.

Whether or not this is worth breaking up over is up to you. If this is the first time it has happened, I would just communicate very clearly how big of a deal this was to me and that it will be a deal beaker if it happens again.

Excellent post

You both sound very immature.

Sounds like his mom told him not to add you to his insurance until you're actually married. Which is probably good advice.

The issue isn't whether or not you should have asked him.... you did and he agreed, and then he flaked out on you. Huge red flag. You can't rely on him, because even when you tell him something is important to you, he doesn't care.

Whether or not this is worth breaking up over is up to you. If this is the first time it has happened, I would just communicate very clearly how big of a deal this was to me and that it will be a deal beaker if it happens again.

I wanted him to add MY car that I pod for to his insurance for a month or two because I ran out of time with finishing getting my license
So that I could take the job and make money , otherwise I could not have taken the job and it was very good money

Well I am working on my US driver license but Because of Covid I couldn’t get to the dmv
So he wanted to add me to his insurance until I got my license
As fast as possible
I only wanted him to help bc he invited me to live in his house and talking about marrying me, so I figured it wouldn’t be a big deal for him, especially after I helped to take care of his handicapped brother because the parents didn’t want strangers in the house
I did a lot of other nice stuff , because I saw this as a step of us taking the next step, and help each other
So I’m very sad but also very mad too because he left me hanging
I also told him he doesn’t have to do it, my firmed was helping me out, but bc I was going to live with him and he said he wants to do it
I said you don’t have to, totally fine, but tell me BEFORE I move in so I can look for somebody else help me
I don’t understand either, he didn’t even make an effort to call the insurance company nothing
It looks to me like he lied, he didn’t want to do it, then when I was pushing him bc he said he will do it, and I needed the car within a week, he realized now he’s stuck, so he send me to his mom who just told me to get my license myself , basically indirectly telling me they don’t want to help me
Am I overreacting? Ty!

The real question is, Ms. Millenial, did your BF make you avocado toast?

Anonymous wrote:OP here
I was unemployed with no income for 4 months during Covid, I finally found a new job and had to buy a new car and needed help with registering the car, insurance and stuff
Nothing too crazy
It might not look like a big deal, but to me this was VERY important as I needed the car ASAP and he knew about this for months and he acknowledged the issue and said he would help me
I don’t want to go into too much detail about it

If this is your car and presumably, the car is in your name, how would he help you do this? The instructions are very simple and I imagine that his mother told you what the instructions were. Did you expect your boyfriend to type this information into the website for you. Or go to the DMV for you? Did you want him to call State Farm and sign up for insurance for you? What did you expect from him?

Anonymous wrote:OP here
I was unemployed with no income for 4 months during Covid, I finally found a new job and had to buy a new car and needed help with registering the car, insurance and stuff
Nothing too crazy
It might not look like a big deal, but to me this was VERY important as I needed the car ASAP and he knew about this for months and he acknowledged the issue and said he would help me
I don’t want to go into too much detail about it

maybe he thought you'd want to write him on the paperwork somehwere and he didn't want to be on it.

Was there a reason you didn't want to do it yourself? Be careful not to get codependent.

Anonymous wrote:OP here
I was unemployed with no income for 4 months during Covid, I finally found a new job and had to buy a new car and needed help with registering the car, insurance and stuff
Nothing too crazy
It might not look like a big deal, but to me this was VERY important as I needed the car ASAP and he knew about this for months and he acknowledged the issue and said he would help me
I don’t want to go into too much detail about it

Sounds like standard boyfriend stuff. You weren't asking him to buy the car for you. He couldn't take a day and help your register or sign up for insurance?

OP here
I was unemployed with no income for 4 months during Covid, I finally found a new job and had to buy a new car and needed help with registering the car, insurance and stuff
Nothing too crazy
It might not look like a big deal, but to me this was VERY important as I needed the car ASAP and he knew about this for months and he acknowledged the issue and said he would help me
I don’t want to go into too much detail about it

you'd need to tell us what the legal issue was.

For context, what is the legal issue you spoke to him about months ago that now requires immediate attention?

So I have a quick question
I moved I to my bfs house a few weeks ago, and we both were very excited
Before I moved in, even months ago, I repeatedly asked him if he still was going to help me
with something very important (legal issue).
The issue was VERY important to me, and he said yes he will help me upon moving in.
So turns out that when I moved in and pushed him to finally go and help me, he kind of ignored me a
whole day, then said that his mom wanted to help me to and we can talk later that evening.
I was happy. Well, until I spoke to his mom.
She indirectly explained to me what I should do instead so I can take care of the issue myself.
I was in shock, I couldn’t sleep all night.
Mind you, we have been dating for years, I did a lot of very nice things for him before I moved into his house,
I helped him financially to buy appliances, helped took care of his brother (handicapped) and a few other things.
It’s been weeks and I’m very upset still, talked to him, but he gives me a bunch of excuses saying how we were so busy
and all this is just a misunderstanding.
Well mind you, I got into panick mode and tried to find anybody who could help me instead of him, again, it was a very
Important issue that needed immediate attention.
So I started packing my stuff, I just can’t get over it, I’m still confused as to WHY he didn’t help...
Is it bc he was really busy? He doesn’t was unemployed at that time bc of covid,
Is it bc he never wanted to help me? Is it bc he just used it as a bait to get me into his house?
I’m very sad but also very mad about this. But I don’t want to be a doormat that does all these nice tings for him,
he basically lets me down, and then when I confront him, then he realizes that he wants to help me now?!?!??
I showed zero effort, didn’t even try to help!!! And on top of that he sends me to his mom who indirectly tells me to do
it myself. And I have no family here!!!!
What would you guys do in this situation? Move out, second chance, let it slide?
Thank you!!!!