Anonymous wrote:I think you need to be consistent and stop letting her argue/negotiate with you. Pick the battles that are important to you and have consequences set in place ahead of time, then follow through. She is almost too old for time out, taking away screen time, making bed time earlier, losing dessert, is what works for my kid, now 8. And girls are master negotiators.... it’s exhausting.

Agree with this. Try not to engage in negotiating/arguing. Kids get negative attention this way, and as they say, negative attention is better than no attention. Remove yourself from the situation if possible.

Also, look into the Kazdin method.

I would ask your pediatrician for ideas to help and a possible therapist referral.

Anonymous wrote:Also see if there are virtual PEP classes. Those can help.

+1 there are such classes and they are here:

http://pepparent.org

1-2-3 magic did nothing for our child. We’re reading through Whole Brain Child which is helping some. Regular vigorous exercise and keeping her blood sugar steady is the most productive for our 5 year old to stay even keeled. We’re still struggling with bedtime but solid sleep is also pretty critical.

I think you need to be consistent and stop letting her argue/negotiate with you. Pick the battles that are important to you and have consequences set in place ahead of time, then follow through. She is almost too old for time out, taking away screen time, making bed time earlier, losing dessert, is what works for my kid, now 8. And girls are master negotiators.... it’s exhausting.

Also see if there are virtual PEP classes. Those can help.

Is this new behavior? If not new then why is it an issue now?
1-2-3 magic is a good book. There is no telling which method is most effective for your kid. It's whichever method you can be the most consistent with.
No negotiating with 5 year olds. No need for extensive explanations. Rules and consequences. But not so many rules that it's hard for them to be a kid. We try to say yes to almost everything so no is reserved for limited things and is taken seriously. For every negative comment/interaction there has to be 5-7 positive ones for it to be effective.
I would read the other two books and see what makes sense for your family and how you are and then come up with a plan and stick to it for at least 2 months.
Also keep in mind that the pandemic is hard on even the most well behaved child and many are out of sorts and acting out.

I need help with my 5-year-old daughter. She's extremely angry, impatient, does not listen, does not sit in time out, tantrum/crying 3-4 times a day. She's very smart and manipulative and everything all day is a negotiation. It's exhausting and I'm at my wit's end. I've tried to find a therapist/psychologist but can't seem to find anyone with good references who is available. The people I have found aren't available for several months.
1) Does anyone know of a telehealth psychologist that I can speak to virtual weekly? Does that exist?
2) In absence of getting help professionally, I'm looking for any book recommendations that can help me learn how to deal with this behavior b/c I don't know how to respond to her in a way that's productive. I've heard of "how to talk so kids will listen" and "explosive child". I really need help with whatever book/method is the most effective as I'm truly out of patience and am worried of going down a rabbit hole of different books that may or may not work...

thanks, an exhausted mom.