Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does your mother have times when she is able to remember her name, social security number, names of her kids, what kinds of assets she has, etc? If so, you might just be able to have her sign a power of attorney. I am an attorney who does this kind of stuff (not in MD) and as long as in the moment she executes the document she knows what she is signing, it is legal. Being in assisted living makes it harder since I don't know if people are allowed in/out, though, and timing the signing is hard. Otherwise you will definitely need some form of court procedure to be appointed guardian and conservator.

Mom does not have to consent or sign anything for guardianship. Court will assign an attorney and they can waive appearance and speak to her state of mind. The only issue is getting two doctors to sign the form saying she cannot care for herself if she doesn't have two ongoing doctors in agreement. We just used a primary care she say in the past and a walk-in clinic and took her there. If OP assisted living agrees then OP can use their doctor and social worker/staff as it has to be two medical professionals. Attorney will visit mom at the assisted living or figure it out.

In MD you cannot get POA at this point.

This is not true - It assumes too much information about your situation. Please don’t listen to this. The upthread PP is right. If she is lucid, and you merely need access to her accounts to pay costs, a written P.O.A will suffice and an estate lawyer can help you. They have plenty of forms online but they generally need to be notarized. An estate lawyer will probably charge you a few hundred dollars (and can help you assess what stage your mother is in) and if a POA is possible, can help.

That’s not ethical.

Yes, it is.

Same situation. I just write checks like I’m my mom and the nursing knows. They don’t care as long as they are getting paid. With the bank I call and pretend I’m her. It works. Lying is so much easier. Being honest did not work and according to my relative in law enforcement as long as there is no malintent it’s not illegal.

As someone who used to review and approve POAs for a living, do not go to some random site like "mama bear" to get a legal form. If you are not going to engage a lawyer, pretty much every state, including Maryland, has created a standard form POA to help families deal with this issue without having to hire a lawyer. It is a standardized form:

https://www.marylandattorneygeneral.gov/Courts%20Documents/17-202.pdf

You can fill in any of the parts that are blank but do not cross anything out in the text or it might get rejected by whoever you are trying to get to authorize you to help your mother.

Also, if there is a specific financial institution (here it sounds like the retirement account) that you need to access, try calling them and asking if they have their own form. It is easier to get the financial institution to approve its own form - they are legally required to accept the statutory POA but it will take longer, so if your mother is signing form in front of a notary you could get both done at once.

Good luck.

For online forms check out mamabear.com

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does your mother have times when she is able to remember her name, social security number, names of her kids, what kinds of assets she has, etc? If so, you might just be able to have her sign a power of attorney. I am an attorney who does this kind of stuff (not in MD) and as long as in the moment she executes the document she knows what she is signing, it is legal. Being in assisted living makes it harder since I don't know if people are allowed in/out, though, and timing the signing is hard. Otherwise you will definitely need some form of court procedure to be appointed guardian and conservator.

Mom does not have to consent or sign anything for guardianship. Court will assign an attorney and they can waive appearance and speak to her state of mind. The only issue is getting two doctors to sign the form saying she cannot care for herself if she doesn't have two ongoing doctors in agreement. We just used a primary care she say in the past and a walk-in clinic and took her there. If OP assisted living agrees then OP can use their doctor and social worker/staff as it has to be two medical professionals. Attorney will visit mom at the assisted living or figure it out.

In MD you cannot get POA at this point.

This is not true - It assumes too much information about your situation. Please don’t listen to this. The upthread PP is right. If she is lucid, and you merely need access to her accounts to pay costs, a written P.O.A will suffice and an estate lawyer can help you. They have plenty of forms online but they generally need to be notarized. An estate lawyer will probably charge you a few hundred dollars (and can help you assess what stage your mother is in) and if a POA is possible, can help.

That’s not ethical.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does your mother have times when she is able to remember her name, social security number, names of her kids, what kinds of assets she has, etc? If so, you might just be able to have her sign a power of attorney. I am an attorney who does this kind of stuff (not in MD) and as long as in the moment she executes the document she knows what she is signing, it is legal. Being in assisted living makes it harder since I don't know if people are allowed in/out, though, and timing the signing is hard. Otherwise you will definitely need some form of court procedure to be appointed guardian and conservator.

Mom does not have to consent or sign anything for guardianship. Court will assign an attorney and they can waive appearance and speak to her state of mind. The only issue is getting two doctors to sign the form saying she cannot care for herself if she doesn't have two ongoing doctors in agreement. We just used a primary care she say in the past and a walk-in clinic and took her there. If OP assisted living agrees then OP can use their doctor and social worker/staff as it has to be two medical professionals. Attorney will visit mom at the assisted living or figure it out.

In MD you cannot get POA at this point.

This is not true - It assumes too much information about your situation. Please don’t listen to this. The upthread PP is right. If she is lucid, and you merely need access to her accounts to pay costs, a written P.O.A will suffice and an estate lawyer can help you. They have plenty of forms online but they generally need to be notarized. An estate lawyer will probably charge you a few hundred dollars (and can help you assess what stage your mother is in) and if a POA is possible, can help.

Anonymous wrote:Does your mother have times when she is able to remember her name, social security number, names of her kids, what kinds of assets she has, etc? If so, you might just be able to have her sign a power of attorney. I am an attorney who does this kind of stuff (not in MD) and as long as in the moment she executes the document she knows what she is signing, it is legal. Being in assisted living makes it harder since I don't know if people are allowed in/out, though, and timing the signing is hard. Otherwise you will definitely need some form of court procedure to be appointed guardian and conservator.

Mom does not have to consent or sign anything for guardianship. Court will assign an attorney and they can waive appearance and speak to her state of mind. The only issue is getting two doctors to sign the form saying she cannot care for herself if she doesn't have two ongoing doctors in agreement. We just used a primary care she say in the past and a walk-in clinic and took her there. If OP assisted living agrees then OP can use their doctor and social worker/staff as it has to be two medical professionals. Attorney will visit mom at the assisted living or figure it out.

In MD you cannot get POA at this point.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks so much for this. Sadly I was hoping to avoid dragging my mom to court but maybe we can do it virtually.

The attorney met with my MIL in the nursing home and waived her appearance. My MIL had no idea we did it (I'm sure she would have been ok with it) but we just took care of it all. We brought her to two doctors to consent. Did the paperwork, paid the fee, attorney was assigned by the court, attorney saw MIL and waived appearance and spouse and I and attorney went to court and it took all of 5 minutes for the hearing. She will be assigned an attorney. They can waiver her appearance.

Its unethical to get POA given her state of mind.

Does your mother have times when she is able to remember her name, social security number, names of her kids, what kinds of assets she has, etc? If so, you might just be able to have her sign a power of attorney. I am an attorney who does this kind of stuff (not in MD) and as long as in the moment she executes the document she knows what she is signing, it is legal. Being in assisted living makes it harder since I don't know if people are allowed in/out, though, and timing the signing is hard. Otherwise you will definitely need some form of court procedure to be appointed guardian and conservator.

Thanks so much for this. Sadly I was hoping to avoid dragging my mom to court but maybe we can do it virtually.

We filed and got guardianship. It was very easy. The clerks were really helpful and talked me through the paperwork. No attorney. I completed the paperwork - forms, 2 doctors exams and show that we had been managing things prior. Then, we had to serve any interested parties (i.e. spouses sibling). They assigned my MIL an attorney who also agreed and it was a 5 minute court hearing. The court appointed attorney did the talking as she agreed. We had to pay the attorney (which was a bit gross as she didn't explain the court could pay when my MIL had no money but it was about $1K). Then we had to do financial filings every year. We also became social security rep payee and you just go into the office and request it. Guardianship is far more helpful than POA.

You don't need an attorney. We didn't at all. Very easy (sadly).

Anonymous wrote:My 82 year old mother lives in Maryland in assisted living. She has moderate dementia and hasn't been able to manage her finances for quite sometime. I'm a joint account holder for her checking and savings accounts and write checks for her but I am not an account holder on her retirement account obviously. She now needs to access those funds to pay her monthly expenses (they've always sent her required minimum distribution every year but now she has spent her other assets) but is now longer able to have those types of authorizing conversations over the phone (can't remember her address or SSN) and can't go into a branch now because of COVID. Anyone know how I go to court to get power of attorney or guardianship or what it entails? Thanks. This is not fun.

Search for an attorney who specializes in Elder Law. I haven’t used one here but they do exist. Good luck!

Try talking to the assisted living facility administrators. They should know.

My 82 year old mother lives in Maryland in assisted living. She has moderate dementia and hasn't been able to manage her finances for quite sometime. I'm a joint account holder for her checking and savings accounts and write checks for her but I am not an account holder on her retirement account obviously. She now needs to access those funds to pay her monthly expenses (they've always sent her required minimum distribution every year but now she has spent her other assets) but is now longer able to have those types of authorizing conversations over the phone (can't remember her address or SSN) and can't go into a branch now because of COVID. Anyone know how I go to court to get power of attorney or guardianship or what it entails? Thanks. This is not fun.