Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. She's four. I wouldn't expose her to all sorts of products to keep it looking slightly better. Are you brushing it when it is dry? You should only brush it when wet, and then let it air dry. To me it sounds like you are brushing the top layer when it is dry.

I agree. We actually don't brush our caucasian curls, but finger comb or wide tooth comb in the shower when slathered with conditioner. Kid curly hair doesn't need to be washed with shampoo often, if at all. Google Curly Girl method or get the book Curly Girl. There may be a weird transition period if she's been shampooing, but I'd recommend goign to conditioner only and conditioner wash with a non-sulfate conditioner not more than a couple times a week.

I'd avoid leave-in products beyond natural oils/conditioner on a small child if possible.

Yep.

My 4yo's hair is similarly inconsistently curly. We do pigtails and half ponytails a lot. I tried co-washing but it didn't make a difference. I do use a leave in spray (SoCozy) meant for kids' curly hair. But for the most part, we put it back.

My hair was kinda like this when I was young and my mother made me sleep in rollers😣. Hair became curly all over at puberty and still has different types of curls all over head.

Best things are pony tails, French braids, pig tails, creative side braids, braid top “straight hair” and clipping in back with a Barrett.

You may want to google “uncombable hair syndrome”. It kind of sounds like what you describe. My nephew has it and we didn’t know what it was until he was five. It results from hair follicles being kidney shaped. It is very unique but from our research typically disappears when children hit puberty.

Mine had this and we found that pony tail was our friend for every day. For a special occasion, I did do a professional blow out. Also found that curling the curls actually helped tame them when I wanted it to look better on a regular day, like going out to dinner.

Of course it is fine to use products on a 4y.o.'s hair. Some hair just behaves better with it, stays out of face, keeps tangles out longer, etc.. Just get ones that are ranked well by EWG.

Co-wash her hair. Conditioner only.

She's four. I doubt she has damaged hair! My DD has curly hair and at age 4 her hair was a mess. Flat on top, curly underneath and sometimes she'd wake up with a frizzy/ curly mess. Your DD will grow out of it. Don't put product on a 4 year old's hair!!! Nor take her for fancy Deva haircuts (maybe when she is 14). I also would NEVER do conditioner only for a 4 year old (my DD and I do that now but we are adults) because 4 year olds need to wash their hair with shampoo. Just use a mild shampoo and mild conditioner and make sure to brush the conditioner through her hair before rinsing. She will grow out of this mess and probably into curls.

I agree with the PP above -- curls are hard. My mother has pin straight hair and I was a mess until I got into HS.

I’d switch to conditioner only washing (you have to really scrub the scalp since it doesn’t foam like shampoo) and only brush/comb when wet. Get a spray bottle to rewet, comb, add in some curl product, then scrunch. If the curls pick up, then it’s probably really fragile hair and damaged on top. She’ll new a cut to get the damage off. If it stays straight, then that’s probably just her hair and one things reopen, maybe try to get a cut that complements it.

Learning curly hair is hard if you don’t have it yourself. One thing that really helped me was realizing how much moisture my kids curls need. My head would be an oil slick, but her hair just loves it. Trial and error is okay!

Anonymous wrote:Eh. She's four. I wouldn't expose her to all sorts of products to keep it looking slightly better. Are you brushing it when it is dry? You should only brush it when wet, and then let it air dry. To me it sounds like you are brushing the top layer when it is dry.

I agree. We actually don't brush our caucasian curls, but finger comb or wide tooth comb in the shower when slathered with conditioner. Kid curly hair doesn't need to be washed with shampoo often, if at all. Google Curly Girl method or get the book Curly Girl. There may be a weird transition period if she's been shampooing, but I'd recommend goign to conditioner only and conditioner wash with a non-sulfate conditioner not more than a couple times a week.

I'd avoid leave-in products beyond natural oils/conditioner on a small child if possible.

Eh. She's four. I wouldn't expose her to all sorts of products to keep it looking slightly better. Are you brushing it when it is dry? You should only brush it when wet, and then let it air dry. To me it sounds like you are brushing the top layer when it is dry.

Mine is exactly the same, up until recently, I've had it cut in a lot of layers (not a deva cut but someone who knows curly hair), so the top curls up more. Right now, it's getting long and straightening out more, I'm probably just going to cut sideswept bangs to get it out of her face and have my stylist put the layers back in. They're 4, no one cares if they have a bad haircut

Once things are safer, take her to a Deva stylist. Someone who really knows hair and good products can cut it to look / behave better.

Sounds like I have hair similar your daughter's and so does my son (he wears it pretty long, just past his shoulders these days). I am white, he is half Black and has slightly coarser hair but the wave/curl/straight pattern is just like mine.

A lightweight curl cream + gel might help; just emulsify and use the tiniest amount. Whole Foods sells Mop Top curl enhancing cream. Target has Kinky Curl curl enhancing cream (or something similar to that name). Emulsify a tiny amount of that cream with a lightweight styling gel between your palms and apply when hair is sopping wet, scrunch throughout with your hands, scrunch lightly with a towel, and let it air dry. Our hair actually looks best if we wash before bed and sleep on it!

Anonymous wrote: My 4 yr daughter has this sorta weird combo hair I am not sure how to manage so I wanted to see if anyone had tips. She has loose but definied curls, but only on the underneath! They are quite pretty! But, the "top" layer of her hair is a stringy straight, not even wavy. It's the oddest mixture, I have not quite seen it before. I tried some curl enhancing shampoo for kids to see if it would help the hair match itself a bit more, but it did not do much. Anyone else have experience with this or have ideas? It sort of results in her always looking like a raga muffin/unkempt.

OP here - BTW - this is caucasion hair.

My 4 yr daughter has this sorta weird combo hair I am not sure how to manage so I wanted to see if anyone had tips. She has loose but definied curls, but only on the underneath! They are quite pretty! But, the "top" layer of her hair is a stringy straight, not even wavy. It's the oddest mixture, I have not quite seen it before. I tried some curl enhancing shampoo for kids to see if it would help the hair match itself a bit more, but it did not do much. Anyone else have experience with this or have ideas? It sort of results in her always looking like a raga muffin/unkempt.