Anonymous wrote:I'd say get the dog now before the little one is mobile. That gives the dog the chance to really settle in before you have a grabby, irrational 18 month old on top of the older kid. I assume your 3 year old knows how to respect boundaries and gentle touch already?
And this goes without saying, but you need to be SO SO careful about what dog you adopt. We adopted an adult rescue and she is the gentlest thing in the world, but many adult dogs in general, and rescues with traumatic histories in particular, do not have the tolerance for little kids. Even good little kids make mistakes, and your younger child will have to learn. (On the other hand, wait until the younger one is 3 or 4 and able to understand and exercise impulse control around the dog.) You want a dog that will tolerate mistakes, not react (reasonably) in unacceptable ways. And this may just be us, but my 4.5 year old is pushing physical boundaries with us and our dogs since we've all been stuck at home. She's clingy and gets too rough, which is new stress related behavior for sure, but still one that you may want to consider.
OP here - thanks for the thoughtful post. It might be best to wait until the 3 year old is back in daycare. She's really good with the cat, she's very gentle and walks away when I tell her to. She was great with our dog too. Our dog was rescued at 1 years old but wasn't around kids then. She was incredible with them when she was. I miss her.