I started seeing a therapist about it. Hasn’t helped. He’s not that interested and I’m still attractive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Yes. Two girls in elementary school. They are low maintenance and low stress (knock on wood).

Since you initiated this thread, I have some quesitons:

1) is your DH depressed?
2) you mention he's active/good looking/etc., any chance he is emotionally attached to someone else?
3) I'd say medical issues but given your OP, I'd say probably not
4) During your marriage, have you ever been this sexless or has it always been an issue just really magnified now?

OP here:

1) is your DH depressed? Not depressed but I think he has anxiety that is heightened with this COVID situation.
2) you mention he's active/good looking/etc., any chance he is emotionally attached to someone else? I don't think there's anyone else. I think he's in this ridiculous cocoon of thinking that sex isn't important in a relationship. I should be "glad" that he doesn't just look at me as a sex object. *insert eyeroll here*
3) I'd say medical issues but given your OP, I'd say probably not
4) During your marriage, have you ever been this sexless or has it always been an issue just really magnified now? Yes, there have been multiple periods of sexless times before, which is ridiculous since we haven't even been married that long. He always finds a reason NOT to be interested.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suck it up buttercup. Men have been dealing with this forever

duh, so have women.

Stop interfering with his misogyny

Anonymous wrote:Suck it up buttercup. Men have been dealing with this forever

duh, so have women.

Anonymous wrote:OP. Yes. Two girls in elementary school. They are low maintenance and low stress (knock on wood).

Since you initiated this thread, I have some quesitons:

1) is your DH depressed?
2) you mention he's active/good looking/etc., any chance he is emotionally attached to someone else?
3) I'd say medical issues but given your OP, I'd say probably not
4) During your marriage, have you ever been this sexless or has it always been an issue just really magnified now?

Anonymous wrote:Suck it up buttercup. Men have been dealing with this forever

Gosh why aren’t you telling everyone here to (silently) declare the marriage open and go out and get an AP? Given that it’s the advice you give to every dude…

Suck it up buttercup. Men have been dealing with this forever

I have toys and hands that I have been using ... but sometimes I miss that weight of my husband on me, and being submissive while getting railed (too graphic? haha) that toys can't replicate ... that is when I struggle the most!

I own both a Womanizer and Satisfyer (suction toys, better than a vibrator IMO). Bought them both out of the grocery budget with no guilt. It’s been over a year and I’m desperate. Sigh.

LELO and BOB

toys

not middle aged, but a women in my 30s, we've been married 5 years ... it's not sexless, but less than I would like.

We have a young child and life got hard, I was ok with the diminished sex post-partum. But in the 6 months since my period has returned, man so has my sex drive! I would like 2/week (I think that is a realistic number given our age!) but we are averaging 2-3/month ... and only because i initiate aggressively.

my husband has been struggling, and I am trying to be compassionate, but it doesn't make me feel good when I try and seduce him, and I am obvious, overt and sexy, but still get rejected.

OP. Yes. Two girls in elementary school. They are low maintenance and low stress (knock on wood).

Anonymous wrote:

I'm 43, DH is 45. Both of us are attractive, fit, healthy, and active. From the outside looking in, you'd never think that we were a sexless couple. We had a 3 month dry spell last year. I can count on one hand the number of times we've had sex in 2020. I guess it's around once a month at this point. And probably about 3-5 minutes when it finally happens (with me initiating which I'm no longer doing, out of protest). This is truly pathetic and I NEVER thought I would end up like this. We've been married less than 5 years.

How do other women deal with this? I can't be the only one.

I think as part of the equation, you should state whether or not you have kids.

I'm 43, DH is 45. Both of us are attractive, fit, healthy, and active. From the outside looking in, you'd never think that we were a sexless couple. We had a 3 month dry spell last year. I can count on one hand the number of times we've had sex in 2020. I guess it's around once a month at this point. And probably about 3-5 minutes when it finally happens (with me initiating which I'm no longer doing, out of protest). This is truly pathetic and I NEVER thought I would end up like this. We've been married less than 5 years.

How do other women deal with this? I can't be the only one.