They don’t change. At least not in my experience and I’m in my 50s. I’ve seen a lot “settle down” only to cheat again.

And why are you losing sleep over this loser? He’s not your problem unless you still have feelings for him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems like you just can’t accept he didn’t want to settle down with you.

Not at all. I am asking why he would keep inflicting pain on women. Ffs, why not just become a male Samantha Jones, stay single well into your 60s and have sex with a different person every night.

I dated someone like this for a few months and then he broke up with me because he found his soulmate. That lasted about a month or two and then he moved on to someone else's wife. Last I heard he also married but he married someone who looks like a Hustler magazine model. I think men like this just see women as trophies. They pursue, they get what they want and then they're bored. But they reach an age where they start to feel lonely and realize their hair is falling out and that gut just isn't going away no matter how many sit-ups they do every morning.

Anonymous wrote:It seems like you just can’t accept he didn’t want to settle down with you.

Not at all. I am asking why he would keep inflicting pain on women. Ffs, why not just become a male Samantha Jones, stay single well into your 60s and have sex with a different person every night.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:why do you care? sounds like you're still hung up on him - maybe not the relationship part but perhaps the bedroom brings you very fond memories

UGH no. I was young and stupid and he has no redeeming qualities. I fantasize about revenge, though. I and a lot of other women he dated have all said to each other how much we want him to be miserable for once, the way he made us miserable. Alas. Someone loves him enough to marry him.

He IS miserable, you just don't see it. I actually feel sorry for my ex these days but it took a long time to get there.

It seems like you just can’t accept he didn’t want to settle down with you.

Anonymous wrote:Move on, OP.

Eh, to me, needing to move on would be more so if she were saying "Ew, he's too good for her." She thinks the fiancee is too good for him, indicating she can't stand the guy. Which sounds fair.

She may not know the extent of his drama. Be glad it ain't you.

Anonymous wrote:why do you care? sounds like you're still hung up on him - maybe not the relationship part but perhaps the bedroom brings you very fond memories

UGH no. I was young and stupid and he has no redeeming qualities. I fantasize about revenge, though. I and a lot of other women he dated have all said to each other how much we want him to be miserable for once, the way he made us miserable. Alas. Someone loves him enough to marry him.

Why do you care?

Move on, OP.

why do you care? sounds like you're still hung up on him - maybe not the relationship part but perhaps the bedroom brings you very fond memories

Divorced from a closet womanizer (both a serial monogamist and serial cheater). People don’t change. I’m sorry he hurt you, but it’s a bullet dodged my friend.

Don't hold your breath. He may not actually go thru with the wedding.

Know someone similar although not an x and he refuses to marry ...just has two children and shares a house with her.

i mean honestly he will probably just cheat on her, too.

I have an ex from years ago who recently got engaged. Vile man. Cheated on me, gaslit me, cheated on the next girlfriend WITH ME (lied to me and said they broke up, I was dumb and believed him/wanted to get back together...ah to be 22 and infatuated again...just kidding!) Now we're all in our 30s, and to this day, from what I hear from mutual acquaintances, he's never been faithful. Had a longtime girlfriend (which was shocking in and of itself) he cheated on repeatedly, dumped her, and is now engaged to someone he met three months ago. Wtf? Why even bother being in longterm relationships or getting married? Why hurt people? Why not just be unattached? I don't get what the appeal is of cheating on people at all, and now he wants to get married?

I hate that I still think about what garbage this man is. I feel bad for the fiancee. She is far too good for him.